#1223 - Greg Fitzsimmons

January 11, 2019

Greg Fitzsimmons is a writer and stand-up comedian. He also hosts a podcast with Alison Rosen called "Childish" that is available now on iTunes & Stitcher.

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my guest today is one of my best friend's one of the guys I started out doing stand-up with one of my most brilliant friends and just one of the most fun guys a fucking man's man he's Greg Fitzsimmons ladies and gentlemen let him know

The Joe Rogan Experience

that's it wow to count from young Jamie Gregory Hawaii fella Joe Rogan always a pleasure to be back in the days that you kept the studio the same as the old one cuz the vibe was perfect I tried to recreate it as long as we had the desk we have the heart of the heart of the studio the rest of it's just stuff Jamie the heart Jamie guide us the some about I really think that when you use a desk for a long time there's something about desks like if you found out like

Hunter S Thompson desk what's for sale right yeah and I sold one of those old like railway station roll-top desks

check my shit while I'm out so nobody reads my journey of my all-time favorite photos of him was him typing in Big Sur like sitting on like this this outside table typing I think he's

on the edge of a cliff or something like that in the background you see the water yeah you know that photo Jamie yeah that's it right there conic writing photos of all-time Hunter S Thompson with hair in front of the water at Big Sur and probably like 1960 something and you know his schedule is your read his schedule at his daily schedule

not only did I read it he lived I read it on air and I might have it on there with you yeah I think you did

so this position in Big Sur house when he was in the early stages of his a ruption that was like right around when he was writing Hells Angels probably 161 but the one that was the mainstream one what was that so yeah yeah it was called Gonzo and then there was there's another one that was made by BBC that's really good too

but yeah but you can't hold us fucking Hemingway's desk

yeah anyway maybe like worth too much if you would want to write on it for first describe the excess Coke off of why did you learn from the underside of the table

get the vag sauce off the sides what about its typewriter how much is a used typewriter Hemingway's house and hangouts preserved in Havana wow

so they preserve where he lived

and I wonder if that's why he killed himself I think he was in Cuba when he killed himself

yeah man hit some

his style of writing in like that whole bravado that went with him and he was a different cat is like a you thought of him is like an aggressive male writer but that's an odd thing like Hemingway horrific depictions of violence and Gore and Terror in his books he's not thought of his like this opposing physical thing you know he gets his elderly age he was he used to go skiing in the winter in I think it was Switzerland and they would all there was no chairless back then so you would fucking grab your 50 lb skis and walk up the side of the Alps Jesus cry like a half a day to take

one fucking around and he would do that every day. Must be amazing for you yeah goddamn

what kind of exercise like carrying skis uphill in the snow

that's incredible exercise I can pet them what they were jacked up at those skiers from the olden days they had to be like crazy athletes and their like twice as long as they are now when did anybody figure out a ski lift

I don't know but I mean Hemingway would have been skiing and what the 1930s God damn dude the walk uphill and ski down you'll be dedicated how could he ever going to get I mean normally you do in a day maybe you do a dozen runs going up a couple miles and this when you do one run that's it you got to be dedicated try getting up like a lazy person to do that lazy people ski you know I mean because you just kind of get into it and you can you don't have to like you get crazy right you can just be like I'm I'm not good so I ski like a lazy person didn't fall because I've had knee surgery so crazy it's crazy how quickly you can fuck up your body

my whole life never had an injury and I ski hard I hit every fucking jump I can find might be the only one that I know that like my friend Matt he broke his ankle re broke his ankle and happen in the course of like just a year to friends at school parents at school blew out their ACL

yeah I want to do that when your 43 you don't write that's the thing as you get to a certain age and you the risk-reward because injuries take so much longer to heal and you have so much less time to live you just the math doesn't work anymore ski you got to protect your knees if you can or so goddamn important whenever people have liked hurting these

and they keep working out I always cringe I'm not going to get it fixed I'm just going to rehab it might we we talked about rehabbing. Rehab and you just going to ignore the fact you don't have an ACL rehabbing yeah in your knee so there's a lot of guys who blow it out and they keep exercising they just chew the inside of their knee apart get some going out of my the inside of my left knee to fucking months if I try to squat down and kills is like a tendon on the inside of the knee and so I'm going to start some physical therapy this week to try to figure it out cuz I can't I have an exercise in fucking two months just because this one thing to do ever thought about getting like PRP or Regina King or anything into it now what's that well PRP is platelet rich plasma and what they do is they take your blood and there's some sort of a process they do

and they separated and then they take this platelet rich plasma in the injected into the wounded area and accelerates healing lot of people have really good results with that that's like platelet rich plasma but it's apparently the next step up and what they do the heat your blood and by heating it produces some of them for sure if your doctor I'm so sorry I'm butchering this your scientists but I think it produces some sort of anti-inflammatory serum because your blood is reacting to the heat explains I've had this done and it was really effective removed from the layer and cultured with glass beads that are white blood white blood cells produce irap which is a natural anti-inflammatory glass beads going into your knee is removed from this layer and cultured with glass beads so this room

after the platelet rich plasma said they get the serum and then they and then they culture it so the white blood cells produced this natural anti-inflammatories they tricked the white blood cells I guess maybe for lack of a better word anyway so this shit it's really good for accelerating your recovery process for an injury like a lot of people like to do it like Wally if they get surgery to get surgery and they have some of this done to it accelerates the healing right especially as you get older just provide you with an idiot actually natural to worry about it but it provides you with this just an extra boost of healing injuries and back injuries people like it for inflammation you know today is it local they shoot the blood into the area

it's like it's yellow Serum is squirted into your back and Damned weird in my car to I don't know if it's legal you can sell all kinds of things right but you can't sell some of your own blood is that right I don't think so you think you can sell your whole blood blood bank right for the website and it would be doing it if you could. If you could just give someone who was selling blood like something you know there's a lot of those young enterprising young gals on the internet that sell like dirty socks they sell toe nail clips and Chantix

nothing nothing goes to waste no nothing goes with blood for sale India's illegal red Market what is this Jim L this is like this is out there doing it like medically though an Alleyway yeah but that's how they do it there

man that's crazy is there still a ban on Haitian people in gay people giving blood

that's a very good question cuz they've they've gotten so close to stopping HIV they can get it like not a correct me if I'm wrong then get it like to you to the point where you can't even detect it oh yeah which is incredible Peter current he lives in Zimbabwe and Mozambique and he used to work for the health department in LA county he was the guy that was in charge of AIDS prevention and so he got a job working over in Africa and he said that you can now cure not cure but stabilized somebody with HIV with a pill that's like $60 a month or something like that yeah they've got the price Way Down in Africa now that's incredible

why is there so many cases of HIV in Africa

well I think what nutrition is poor then there's more cutting and bleeding cuz I had heard that a lot of what you see in terms of like if they're talking about AIDS in Africa that it's a very easy to put AIDS I put like that category AIDS but sometimes it's people with damage immune systems from a host of different diseases that it's sometimes the people aren't getting tested always wondered like how many those people are tested for HIV right right what is the fact that a guy like Magic Johnson is had it since remembered when he heard Magic Johnson I was in a panic I felt like it was a zombie movie like it's happened started and then people just going to get it we're all going to die of AIDS everybody Our Generation when you and I were like twenty one that's what everybody thought he was going to die from AIDS

any All-Star Game and all the players are like the sound good

do you slam dunk contest by Jesus Christ but what did what did fucking Damon Wayans used to have a bit about Dennis Rodman

status about Dennis Rodman spitting in Magic Johnson's mouth accelerated symptoms he's like if you wanted to try to get hardcore with them

I'm freaked out I hope Damon's I'm a huge Damon Wayans fan so I hope I'm not butchering his bit but I think that was one of I know that was his life I'll spit Your Mouth accelerate your symptoms

dude I'm Damon Wayans my opinion is like one of the most ignored greats and twice I remember him coming in on a Thursday night it was Thursday to Sunday Faneuil Hall comedy connection Thursday night he comes in fucking yellow pads he goes up and just regurgitates a new hour and gets okay laugh for a new hour Friday night he comes back tighter tighter Sunday night it's like he would fucking destroy the new our it was crazy he's really good man he would go out who would just go up at The Comedy Store and literally let whatever thought came into his head and you take long sets

he would take that stuff and he would turn that stuff into Taylor closing bits but for whatever reason I think you just got into doing sitcoms more right

yeah he's a he's got interesting family man they you know they grew up in the projects in Manhattan dude palette in that family Marlin Sean when Jesus Christ yeah that's a lot of killing and it isn't Damon son doing stand-up tuna dude at Damon Junior right crazy family now

as a crate you better be in Show Business in that family are you doomed yeah we think about that it's like right or if you want to compete with your brothers Keenen Ivory Wayans Damon Wayans Kim Wayans Shawn Wayans Marlon Wayans Damien Dante Wayans Damon Wayans Jr

that's all of them all of them show business amazing

good luck until a fucking great talk show how the air for whatever reason Matt Damon did this one HBO special I think he called his last stand

and it was really good man was really good and the end of it he just throws the microphone down and says like this the last time we doing stand-up that's it last stand with?

Yeah

he got them you know just got into other stuff but I'm telling you man when he was like go up and above go that photo though the one like that was the stage the beret-wearing stage yeah dude I'm telling you people forgot he's one of the best at one of the best ever do he would murder that one particular special it's just murderous got a lot of great sets on television

but just like real Regional to like one of those guys we'd watch him you go God damn why didn't I think of that and it's just it just sucks that just sounds like the guy raising his voice does Noah like female intonation do it or anything and his kids voices and his wife for a girlfriend just fucking amazing

yeah they're L and then of course it's so many characters in In Living Color how about handyman you could never do that you could never do that to a homeless guy dude that's another show In Living Color is another show that people forget they forget how good it was yeah there is this handy man you don't even show reruns of that show do that are free

I remember when I was on TV man no one could stop saying Homie don't play that everybody would say that everybody is like Homie don't play that like every kid would say that his homie the clown Homie don't play that people forgot

Homey the Clown

they should come back Netflix please throw some money at getting back on the air and I don't know if it was going to be the original cast I met have been part of the original cast I bet it would have more Jennifer Lopez you want to be a Fly Girl know if she jumped back in with a Fly Girl Again how much time would it take

give it

I know who else was a flag run the other famous ones do that show was so good I remember watching it I was playing pool in Yonkers New York and I looked up at this this TV set and it was Jim Carrey doing the the the fire marshal Fire Fire Marshall bill was like what the fuck is going on Rosie Perez the choreographer for the first four seasons Rosie Perez a giant boxing fan boxing expert expert Liska trained Fighters but like people ask a question about boxing. She is always around box I think it's okay cuz you always think of her as having that that cute voice and you know what all those comedies and to see her at like boxing matches really into it

cool Jim Carrey I mean Jesus Christ who did he would do the the convenience store security guy and he was just so big and so big so different than like I mean you have to go back to Jerry Lewis to think about somebody doing physical comedy that well yet he was he was at 10 like his energy and everything was like the fucking Ace Ventura movie but then we was just all performance what is this what is this Vera De Milo do that fucking show was so good people forgot yeah there's Fire Marshall Bill so I'm as in I was in this pool hall and I looked up I'm like what the fuck is that they like that's Fire Marshall Bill that's that's what it is he came in like that like that is the creepiest thing I've ever seen a can't believe they have a character like this I'm so over-the-top do you think Jim Carrey or maybe that one of the Wayans brothers has bought up the rights for reruns be

they don't want that

black yeah no it's a different era and you have to accept is a different era

you just people are different look people are changing and it's really interesting obvious sign that things that were super acceptable and when was this In Living Color I want to say it was like 90 to 94 1994 so that the way you could do certain bits and what you get away with him put on television is just different so I think that's one of those like probably one of the least understood things that's happening with us with social media is as rapid evolution of what's acceptable not acceptable anymore and is changing very quickly in terms of subjects in terms of the way you approach things in terms of like obvious bigotry or obvious bias it's like it's all getting very highlighted well I think the big question is whether or not you see an artist as somebody who's taking their inner vision and putting it out and you

for the rider you don't or is it are we supposed to be representing Society in our stand up or is it all supposed to be fair balance representations of different ethnic groups in genders you know and it's like when did it all have to become a morality tale when did every depiction of every race have to be fair new can't you have an asshole who's black cat you have a killer who's gay without it becoming a depiction of that entire so you know what group yeah it's like if what are a real problem that prejudice does exist so when it does exist you kind of look for it and things and you say hey this has the characteristics of prejudice I see this here I see what you doing here. I think this is prejudiced this is making fun of Puerto Rican men is not prejudiced this is an account of real occurrences that I've turned into humor

does the flamboyant masculinity of Puerto Rican men like in New York like that's if you if you thought of a type of Latino sort of the bravado you know the music the food everything spicy like like you can make fun of that come on in Puerto Ricans you never inside or outside they're always both like this always a window in the car this is observing can I take an object can I tell you that yesterday about twice a week I go to this Japanese Market in Mar Vista and they've got all different kinds of you know you can get sushi temp or whatever

the parking lot for this place because 80% of the people that are Asian film it and put it on a fucking television channel 8 is it is just people who produces I can announce it like I was AJ foyt here in Emmy award-winning writer you could actually do something like that you like a legit right or you can totally produce that can you imagine an ounce to like NASCAR it's just people like not getting how to get out of a parking spot without taking like 8K turns and people on the wrong side of the street and backing up without looking over their shoulders and they're all agent and it's fucking hilarious I didn't I didn't tell them to do it I didn't say it was wrong but it's happening explained it why it's a stereotype but why also Dwight Asian people would be more likely to walk straight and you don't like if you if you go to watch Ina or if you go to any of those age

company Asian countries when people walk straight out of each other they all kind of have this way of touching and they just there's so many people that just grinding past each other when you're in China in particular people are like indifferent to bumping into you doesn't bother them at all they just bump into U of A Plane they've just bump into you walk right through you it's just that's how they did not rude just like how you doing why can't you comment on that boy couldn't you come in on that if that's a real thing cuz that is a real thing they do do that yeah they also do a lot of great stuff it's not like you're not it's a negative judgment on the entire race because they had this one characteristic but to ignore that one characteristic seems crazy why can't I talk about something like I'm not it's not mean not a bad person to talk about a real thing that you see and I see

times now that never used to happen for what would you say I did a joke we don't say the joke but just like I say I don't care because I don't think it's offencive but there's but this person did you know I was girl it's Girl Scout cookie season those little horses are out there popping up the tables wherever you are selling those stale shity overpriced but you buy them cuz it makes you feel good like you're a good person you know and then you walk through the parking lot and some black kid comes up with a box of Snickers gone hey we support my basketball team and you're like that's a fucking scamps

they're not all like that's not what we're saying stupid you're doing a character but they got a very real thing by entire life I have bought Girl Scout cookies and I have not always bought that fucking Snickers bar in the Subway or the sometimes I do

yeah the Girl Scout cookies it's universally accepted

yeah right then we have like the ones that I like are the ones that it's like a coconut while I'm with my son I like chocolate on that one called

but then there's also like the steps away from Girl Scout cookies where when you don't have to participate like when kids come over with chocolate or candy buy Girl Scout cookies won't support the Girl Scouts you know it's such a scam all that money goes to the manufacturer apparently this girl scouts make like 20% of the the cookie money for someone came in so ruthless man probably the Moa some milk don't come yet yeah I almost taste the honeyed look at it chocolate coconut goodness

so far they have to be so bad for you but I was when I was working on a TV show one of The Producers had a daughter who was in the Girl Scouts and I guess you win contest if you sell over he saw the most cookie boxes so when the audience Woodstream out after the shows The Daily Show and the only two extreme out and the girl had a table set up to sell cookies and she was selling a hundred bucks is a day and for every day she was there fucking won that contest

and where the audience warm-up guy like plug it during the show like after the show like a comedian selling a CD that's what should I go buy some Girl Scout cookies on the way out

all these least fat people from the Midwest are like cookies

I like Marie Callender's they just have pie just buy just pie not even good pie it's good but it's not great considering it's all they do I should have eaten there I don't think I've ever eaten that maybe I hate that one I don't think I had their pie that seems a weird thing like I'm selling pies and have a good luck

good luck sound pies

but they're everywhere we know yes or no flour

like how genius is that company owns Entenmann's cakes and cookies too but they do they used to have this this I God damn it this pastry I'm trying to think of what the hell it was but it had like like hard sugar on the outside of it and it had some sort of creamy sweet stuff on the inside and holy shit was a good goddamn we lived out that she is every night they had like they had one that had like a chocolate filling it in about 1 powdered outside filled my day went out of business and then they seemed that was the cheese one that was a good one too I remember the cheese filled crumb dad some ridiculously delicious shit have any other big ones you know I decided to fight in the tournament once because I had a crazy sugar high from Dunkin Donuts

I hurt myself I heard something in my crotch I couldn't work out for like a week now that I pulled some sort of a muscle and there was a big tournament was coming up and my although the guys are competing with we're going to the tournament is like I just fought like a week before like I don't think I could do it I'm like this doesn't feel right I'm just going to take the whole week off so I decided I'm just going to take off let us think he'll and so we deliver my newspapers and I go to Dunkin Donuts and I got this powdered lemon filled donut I got one of those and I got a a Boston cream donut at one of those and I got to eat like three Donuts up exhausted tired drinking coffee delivering fucking newspapers for 3 hours and I was so jacked on sugar and coffee that I said fuk it I want to fight and so I drove into town like right before everybody was leaving me like why you hear I said I'm going to fight anyway man

Beavis and Butt-head I won I won the tournament tournament for me it was big is the American open was like a big a big deal wow yeah it was going to do it I got jacked up on sugar and made it a rash decision I can see you winning the first match but then I let them then you crash. Keep fighting no it didn't it worked out somewhere another I guess I ate when I got there too but also the week off I never done that like taking a week off sometimes when you do something like that where you if you exercise too much you really always in a state of recovery and your body doesn't get a chance to look fully charged back up again so the time I was probably 19 and I was going hard like everyday everyday that I could say I've never really taken at week off so taking a week off and just be like wow this is did take a week off when I started getting laid that is one thing that happened first time you got laid when it first started getting laid

took a long time off he yelled at yeah. I wasn't doing any training but came back all tan and shit

all you did was fought that's a workout at that age that's a workout. You know that those were a 20 minute sessions your body changes from no no urge to fuck to like fucking is your whole life like when you're 18 years the craziest drug ever in like 2 years ago wasn't in your life you're having sex if we're stopping you now they're initiating us can we they want you actually want me to fuck you yeah this is what you like yeah okay yeah feels wrong

but if you insist feels wrong with you like it

your mentality that we think it's wrong that they like it is that a Christian thing so crazy I think it has to do with initially if you read sex at dawn he's got a really interesting series of thoughts on the origins of sexual behavior and why why we all sort of adopted this one thing now it's me ask you I think it's Christian I know it is for me you know I got a lot of a shame about all that stuff has to do with people getting pregnant too yeah I think it had to do with it was too easy for a girl to get pregnant and if a girl got pregnant back when people are fucking just barely making it out of the caves right it was either really good cuz you had food or it was a real burden because you had to take care of this baby now no near you're not going to be gathering food for us all right I think there was a lot of that going on so if you were going to be with a person decided to make babies you got to be sure

this person is going to be there and take care of everything and you're you're all set up so you can get a bunch of guys on the side and having kids with everybody there who's going to raise your kids to come over and talk to his kid he's got to come over talk to his kid right that's having kids back then for guys a reason why a guy stuck around

was you know we have 401k and Ira accounts back then it's like when you when you couldn't gather anymore you were at the mercy of Charity and so if you have a lot of kids you had a chance of being able to actually live in to your old age. Yeah yeah they will take care of you yeah it's also interesting to because there was so much infant mortality back then that there was a lot of places with his real good evidence that they had fertility Cults like they were trying to figure out ways to get pregnant more and easier really trying to have a bunch of kids that died from injuries and sickness and lot of people died from sickness you know no vaccines right and you just at the mercy and then also it's the beginning of Agriculture so all these diseases are emerging that we don't have immune systems for because they're being there being jumped from like they're they're jumping from pigs to people the jumping from chickens and birds to people that's where the source of most of these pandemic

Jesus come from a comes from large-scale agriculture those funky pigs off tuck together in these little cages that doesn't come for free like there's some demons are being brewed in that mix oh yeah what was the what was the source of the Spanish Flu which I think was the most deadly epidemic in US history I was at right it was International to what I was in was International for sure I think for sure was the most deadly epidemic in the US but I think I want to say it came from somewhere around Virginia

simple shit

is going to take time probably New Jersey I feel like it came from some sort of farm situation I don't know why I feel like I'm guessing that surprises some of these like pig farms they have links there are lakes of waste if you see the Drone footage is that we're talking about oh my God some guy one of them just got shot down somebody sent me an e-mail that something would have maybe was Idaho or Iowa one of those Place one was I states that the gag Clause got shut down to a gag clause or say if you were working in slaughterhouse and you saw horrific conditions you got your cell phone out filmed it you can get prosecuted you would go to jail you could be sued because if it came out well it's I think those ag-gag laws existed as soon as they figured out the people get filmed

you know because a few people released videos of her and it look those ag-gag laws capped you know cat people from talking about a lot of creepy shit like this video video this guy decided since no one's going to give him access to film The Place openly she's going to fly over its who flew over with a drone that is Spanish flu thing okay for many years medical historians an epidemiologist hypothesize that the outbreak could have started in a British army base in Etta Place Frost or at Fort Riley in Kansas were the first American cases of the new strain of flu or recorded in March of 1918 more recently have experts have proposed a third hypothesis the Spanish Flu originated somewhere in northern China in late 1917 and swiftly moved to Eastern Europe within a hundred forty thousand Chinese laborers and the French and British governments recruited to perform manual labor to free up the true

for wartime Duty when I killed because of this bow just think about closest will hear a 50 million people claiming claiming more lives in a single year than either the first world war or the four-year Long Black Death Bubonic plague outbreak that swept Europe and Asia in the Middle Ages and this is one that for whatever reason people talk about the plague you talk about you Bubonic plague what you're going through but no one talks about the Spanish flu but that's a rare it's not getting it brought up that off and if you see this number this number of people die 50 million people in a year

in a year man people talk about how bad were says right now but that's not what they're saying they're saying he killed more lives in a single year than either the first world war or the four-year long black Deputy but I have killed in a 1/3 of the population was sick with it at least they didn't all die goddamn bad shape we don't have plagues you know what there is the poverty rate for the average poverty rate in the world has gone up for like the last 10 years does less poverty was less starvation this more education you know there's a lot of there's a lot of good chick going on to it just think about that we haven't had a World War in what 70 years

yeah yeah it's been it's been quite a while that are happening now but something that really affected you know the entire population is Felix even since high school. It's always been like around the corner to go to war with the Russians put your head between your knees did you have to do that did the dark get under the desk drill hilarious get out of the desk so stupid as if they had some way to alleviate our stress attending

yeah nobody knew what the fuck to do so they just made up some nonsense skin under your desk look at this this is the drill all these little kids underneath the tables what a fucked-up thing to put in the kids headband just stop and think about how close we were to doing something so stupid that this could have become a reality and how now think about all this is a reality in certain parts of the world

hiking in our place it's not but another place is it is and that's that's their life mean especially when it comes to things like drone Warfare that freaks me out I know it's very effective at shooting terrorists I know it is I know it's accidents also super effective at killing civilians super effective

he and there's something about when you think about how we're being perceived in the rest of the world is something about not even being present for The Accidental killing that makes it just you know

twice as bad just seems weird apparently gives some pretty severe PTSD you know I'm laughing cuz I'm like thinking like that's so crazy that they don't even have to be there and they're getting PTSD but just the fact that they're doing it from a remote location some of them by the way this is just what I'm reading the last but I would imagine that would kind of fuck with your head

yeah the first couple times would be fun if you like a video game and then and then would start to sink in when you hurt when you heard the reports later you'd have to show detach yourself from it then it would be like this growing thing in the back of your mind you just launching missiles into apartment buildings

and they're telling you it's okay everybody says it's okay it's what you're supposed to do when I talk to this gentleman that I know that was in the CIA he said that all those decisions are done by lawyer how really know whether or not to do it or not do it because at the end of the day lawyers or deciding whether or not it's like likely to be successful with the legal ramifications to go when you're talking about that kind of stuff is like seriously a lot of is decided by lawyers and operated the deciding and yeah yeah and they want to make sure that all the Ducks are in order which I mean is that better or is it better to just leave it to the generals to design

can you get this cartoonish impression without be like some general like the fucking guy from Avatar with a cool-down are the cartoonish out-of-control murderous Soldier

it was Qbert movie

00 Full Metal Jacket now the one with the Peter Sellers was in it and it was about how I how I something the nuclear bomb Oh yes Doctor Strange yeah like the General in that

man you better hope guys like that are on your side dr. strange so there was a great movie man I was with so weird to watch it today I watch the few years back that you really wow to Wild watch these little captured moments in time we can see that people were different then like old movies when you watch old movies you know what the the biggest indication that something different is women didn't work out then they weren't like fit like you used to seeing a lot of actresses that are on TV the new movie called you like CrossFit or something they're all working out they're all taken gymnastics or something or they're doing spin classes and and they have trainers some shit like girls are built now it's a different thing as you go looking like King Kong look like Fay Wray and King Kong

they're built different and they don't last season do manual labor till last

some of them deal when they do at the shock like Raquel Welch like deep in their 60s their spell lasted they're they're tired just it just started as a desk Jane Fonda workouts what was that like 1970-72 should be back here damn that was crazy that was so fucking big it was the first time women were marketed to for exercise I think so I think so I think before that women may be competed in athletic events like it like that when they were young but then when they probably got families or moved on a job they probably stopped what is this one Jamie oh my God look at this is a choreographed dance this is so strange

Robeks Everett Clinic glass they turned everybody gay for about five years we all these guys look at these guys these guys are straight as fuck and they don't even know they're doing gay stuff you know it's like it's like before everybody knew that Rob Halford from Judas Priest is it is gay he used to make everybody dress up like him because everybody like the kids that were straight kids we're huge fans of Judas Priest they would wear the cap and the wearing gay aesthetic like gay biker looking tough guys don't everybody got into it because they loved him cuz you was like he's so badass and he's such a fucking awesome front man that like he had it straight guys dressing up like a gay bike that's fucking hilarious and then he comes out and they're all still

Elizabeth concert is a hundred thousand men

I had him on a show I did once I was like this thing for VH1 called the list bro seriously leather Paperboy hat on was Morgan a soldier's hat and he's got leather vest on with no shirt underneath leather gloves at spice all S&M shit yeah tight tight tight leather pants cellarius like Freddie Mercury

what was my point

what were we were talking about something right before we talked about that are Robux they had dudes wearing singles look at his look at this outfit this is that's like a singlet from wrestling but with long pants this is bananas that they got men a dress like this look at what they're wearing you see their nipples like their nipples are popped out there all supergate out and they speak on string that is 3/4 length Reebok high tops exactly with velcro velcro that's the newest technology profession so look every girl is dressed like you know I guess they look more like why they have two different outfits the girls have some of them exposed the mid drift like the dirty girls that they are in the other ones they wear a one-piece Alan Thicke was hosting this motherfucker course he was wonderful

look at his jacket solve Miami Vice doubt he's got shoulder pads

yeah you got to go get rid of shoulder pads back then you could have shoulder pads in my first jacket it's nice yeah

stuff bra for a girl do you remember people actually dressing like that in a classic situation do they go to classes dress like that class but see if you can find video footage of an aerobics classes of all the guys that dress like that those just got punked somebody talk to me in the dressing like a dancer yeah yeah

and they're not showing the kids video why not so used to be stupid so what if you're stupid once you're stupid Forever it's not real, and your kids love seeing you looking stupid too and you should tell him I had a mullet they laugh one thing that I always do and I told my kids would do something wrong they've done something wrong I say I did worse way worse I did exactly what you did and I lied about it I always lied my parents asked me what do anything wrong I always lied and I'm like I know if you did something that you didn't do it I'm not mad at you I'm just trying to make you not do it in the future cuz I want you to learn why it's bad sometimes sometimes especially as they get older they get upset about things and you got to go you got to calm down going to let you figure out how to calm down and stop screaming at each other sister's name in each other and that you took my thing

that's not you gave it to me don't I thought I can take it back on

it's amazing the pics I can get cuz usually when people get that hostile to each other you see you you're worried is going to be a physical fight like sisters can take it to three times that level that makes you so uncomfortable but then I would cuddle with each other that's Suites New facts and learn new things and watch that little brain filled with information and vocabulary starts growing they like this before but it Bears repeating we look at people in a static state where was looking at people are going to see a guy and he's 40 years old he's an asshole oh that's at 40 year old ass hole that fucking guy know that I got so annoying but you don't think that was a baby a baby with a bunch of shity data thrown out of them a bunch of shity interactions

Gene's bad environment may be some alcohol is bad nutrition throw it throw it on there bunch of bad breaks in life throat on their you know and that happens to so many people so you look at them in instead of always like look at what they are now it's this guy but what they are all of them including you and me is a baby that became an older thing you know a great deal of people whose lives are chaotically fucked up it's through no fault of their own it's a great deal of them it's a large number right you know and as I've gotten older and try to be more compassionate and more more understanding more patient those are things that I worked on a lot and I still struggle with it but

it's all think it's anything you ever really totally get over but you get better you get to see a lot over the years you're a lot more patient yeah I think a lot of that has to do with just getting better at being a person when you work on it but I think I'll also a lot of it has to do with my the change of my attitude about people and that I started to think of them as a product of a lot of different interactions and that we like you should have turned white privilege II fucked-up term right it's weird but you have to admit if you're a person and nothing completely catastrophic is happened to you and you became this fifty-year-old successful Comedians and Emmy award-winning writer and yeah it bad things happen to you right but they could have been fucking way worse

Kevin way worse and for some people it is fucking way worse they just got a shit roll the dice from the jump and it's been bad experience after bad experience and fucking abuse and violence in jail and the the you can't get out there's no way out you can't even read seems like you're around at Sea trying to keep your head above water

and you run into them when the 32 the gas station and it's as much

it's it I mean it's not saying it's not their fault because whenever someone does anything to you it's their fault like someone commits violence on you they they should have done that it's their fault week that's agreed but what were the underlying factors that led this to happen and for all this talk that we do in this country about about violence and crime in the problem of violence and crime nobody ever looks at it in terms of like how do you stop children from being raised fucked up and violent how do you stop them from being abused Chris step in that cuz that's the root of all of it right and I think early childhood education can make a big difference because if you have a kid growing up and you know the dad took off there's no monies living on the street if you can create an environment for that four year old to come in and have two decent meals a nap time some structured play it makes all the difference in the world because that can

come like the family to that now let me ask you this

cuz this is the word in the the biggest crisis in terms of immigration in terms of national discussion the biggest discussion of it that I can never remember right now this Walsh it with a government is completely shut down and no one's Budget on either side and all these government workers are not getting paid and some because Trump wants five billion Dodge for this wall

I'm not let's just

in an ideal world it would be ideal if the way the world worked was the way America works we can just go wherever you want that be the ideal world if the whole world was America in the sense of you can go to New Mexico you don't have to get paperwork signed you don't have to know has to tell you whether or not you're allowed to go visit or not go visit you just drive there that's that's a nice thing about America it's almost like Europe but you don't need a passport not and it's like you're up I know you guys been around longer and all that good stuff that's not what I mean I mean in terms of there's a bunch of different feels it's all speaking one language but there's a big difference between visiting Montana and visiting Miami you know if you go to Billings Montana and hang out with the local folk at a coffee shop and then you go to some fucking crazy after hours after hours party in Miami and Miami Beach at 4 in the morning and P Diddy shows up and fucking you know what is all these celebrities and people are doing coke on the floor and like what the fuc

does a different world is a different world and is a bunch of these different world is a different world you're allowed to go there when it be great if the whole world was like that you just kind of go wherever you want to go and they would all sort itself out the ideas you can't because of a fuk up our quality of life would make us less safe

and I get the argument the certainly you don't want to bring in criminals and murderers you don't want drug dealers making their way into this country and starting gang violence and all that stuff yes you're absolutely right and to deny that I think it's pretty fucking foolish yeah I think it's a matter of like it's a lot to it it's a fluid the border is always going to be fluid and it needs to be fluid you know we need MD immigrant Spirit of coming in and a lot of you start small businesses when you know when you get when they're brought in Legally and so how do you how do you create a flow of people that is good for us cuz they say most of the immigrants that come here are the smartest sharpest people most driven and wherever they're from so we're actually drawing a really good you nobody talks much about the criminals but the truth is most of them that are coming over here are the ones that probably have the most to offer this country exactly like our parents generation like our grandparents like my grandparents like when did your your grandparents come over here it was it your grandparents or

10 my grandparents you might as well and 12 of them came over here and they lived in a two-room fucking mud-hut somehow they kept finding the money to send one kid over the time like you sitting there about fifteen crazy yeah. Kind of shit is what I'm talking about like those kind of people

should they be allowed to come here that's that's how this thing got started the real problem is that their spot that suck that's the real problem so we're talking about like white privilege the white privilege is not the problem the problem is racism racism doesn't exist in everyone's exactly the same and then we're okay now you don't need to worry about white privilege the real probably you're not getting your not getting racist things thrown at you the way black people yeah for sure but that's not the problem the problem is racist things being thrown a black people something I don't get it right so you get it right and it's like to highlight the fact that it's not happening to me I get what you're saying but the real problem I think it's a distraction that the real problem is the racism itself the real problem is me when you see actual Nazis in 2018-2019 actual ones real ones like not not just dressing up as they think the hoot Uomo I got a piece of tape under my nose

there's a fucking people that aren't really Nazis but they're dumb right thinks you're real Nazi in 2019 you like that's real racism I was in Portland they said there's regular clash it's like once a month there's a demonstration and it's either the alt-right having a demonstration and then the what do they call me something far and Tifa antifa show up and they have regular fights and it's fucking Nazis God damn it because it was originally there were no black people allowed in Oregon you know cuz that Portland is for a progressive super Progresso soup arrested but there's no black people there so it seemed they were it was all white

it was all white it was weird weird there. If I was black I would go to Portland a second you have so many friends instantly everybody wants a high-five you have you over for dinner yum

it's all the real problem for sure is any kind of discrimination cuz that that also fux with us too cuz if the if people are discriminating against people we can even make fun of now we have to leave a punching down like that but it's right there that's the best joke and when you think about is a stand-up what your topics are race racism

sexuality Politics the average comic is talking about two topics racism and sexuality you did a great job of covering politics

without actually being political you do a great job. I did this thing during the election about her and I didn't mean it to knock her but it really wasn't about knocking anybody it was about her having a dry pussy and you know that's the kind of political comedy you can expect for me it was also about countdown till Trump calls her a country

that was my favorite is my favorite line about the election jokes about her and then Drew Carey was in the audience and he came up to me after the show he gave me an entire piece of paper with more jokes on that premise he had tears in his eyes like that's the funniest thing I've ever seen here take these he loves filth Drew Carey's when the nicest guy he talks to everybody he was given young Comics advice tell him write a joke a day just one joke a day

fast way to ship to the store together last night and the last time I came home wrote yeah yeah I'm just in this stage of a cup of these bits in the morning right now with them like they're on Bambi legs go go south on me because when you go from doing a special and then Chuck and everything out and starting from scratch it's the most fun time you're a beginner again you think about it all the time I've got to get back to that bit that you think that you're thinking about it all the time you thinking about bits all the time where is once you have an act together and you do you do an hour 20 minutes easy then you're not thinking about it that much thinking about when you do everything about it when you arrived yet I thinking about it all day now you're tweaking it in in motion like when you're on stage and you've got the hour down that's when we you and I were talking about it that a comedian you just told to take a little extra time before

especially and it really isn't that extra few months that you find emphasizing this syllable makes the joke get an Applause break instead of just laughs it's also one of the most interactive art forms ever where is you need other people to do it you need other people to watch there's no way I can do that without you without people debauching whatever it is I can't you can't do it you need them because they help you make it their reactions to what you're saying Titans up what you're saying their reactions make you throw away certain parts just aren't working right. Think it's funny before you decide that part might not to be that good because you in this part this part seems to have fruit to it this far this is the part that kills I didn't expect this part to work but his partner has become a bigger part of the bit in the first part and then weird stuff starts Branch out but I don't think branches off in front of people weird

interesting if if you could track a comedian writing a bit a good comic who really takes on a premise like you do like take on a thought or a philosophy and step it out as far as it can possibly go and what track that person doing that set for 6 months it can morph to wear this almost nothing left from the original premise all the time yeah sometimes I'll take an old joke and I use it as a scaffolding like when I'm writing again and I've got no like I'm trapped and I'm like a kind of way to get from this picture. But I could have told Joe, shove a old joke in there and then from that like the little bursts that you get out of that will carry you want to make this the next premise better it's got a little bit more momentum to it and now you can explore it a little light-headed or a little lighthearted little easier last chance cuz the new stuff think about that fucks me up the most is that I'm not exactly sure what's the best way to do it so I'm thinking about while I'm saying it instead of just being in the moment

until you can just get it to the point where you can be in the moment it's just clung keypad because it's clunky you're nervous because you're nervous or thinking about it all the time so becomes like this Obsession so if I feel like more premises start popping up that way it's weird it's like you have this hyper-focus that's way less comfortable than being like having an hour and 20 down ready to film comfortable but it's probably more productive and turns of like creatively of course but I was I was sick of like it's like learning a new language every time I have a new bit it's like how do I translate this thought in my head into like you said what's my Approach what's my strategy to get that idea across so you're thinking about that and it slows down you that you're not in the moment as much I think I'm going to start doing some real late night sets to that's a good idea but you do tired people write 13 people in the room you'll try those will spots out to you can get a little too used to do in crowds and

a little too used to in crowds what happens is people want to laugh they want to laugh the dare to have a good time when you get it 1 in the morning they've already laughed laughed and laughed and laughed and they've got for our some of them some of them get there at 9 and they stay till to get up to pee and order another drink another sheet and you're watching a crazy lineup of comedians you get on at 1 in the morning I like the Don Barris hour

that fucking you're you're getting in front of people that seen everything so if you make them laugh like that that's a legit bit if you can get through these people when they probably heard everything but I guess you and your voice more because when is only 15 people out there vs. 300 couple hours earlier at 300 you're performing something out to the back of the room they talked about playing to the back of the room and bigger rooms you have to be more physical you have to slow down and and then we have 15 people all of a sudden you're in your human being talking to human beings voice sometimes that's where you can find really the flow with a joke a lot better cuz you're not you're not pumping it up you just saying it yeah I agree but I think you have to do those larger places to just to know how to do them like they're a different thing to do a big theater

a big theater you need to be comfortable with the fact that there's you know x amount of thousands people in that room and unless you do a bunch of those like you and I've done a few of them together are fun but you have a time there's a timing thing this difference you have to like wait a little longer you can't you can't beat your punch lines after the other like you can in the club the club you can just keep you can keep hammering because there's only so many people in the room it won't overpower the sound system for so long, Central demand it was always they want the special shot in a nice theater like a you know 1500 mm Cedar where they can get that big is a crane camera shooting down and and the truth is Formosa including myself I'm not a theater,, Club, so I'll send that shoot my special in a room that holds 1,600 people and it wasn't I don't look back at it and go that's exactly how I wanted to be saying I was slower I was pretty much bigger it's like

I would have rather done it in like a nice little 400-seat Club also you weren't doing a lot of those places so you weren't comfortable with it like Ryan to those really big places once you get comfortable with that you start treating it like a club like one of my most comfortable sets was one of the biggest bass ever did the Scotiabank Arena and in Toronto at the end of my tour what is at the end of the tour the very last spot before the Netflix special came out so I admit I've been doing stand-up like real regular in these big giant ass places for months so when I got there it felt like the store felt like doing the main room was just a bigger main room all right you know you just had fun just have a good time yeah it's just doing a lot of those who got to do them but you really do have to do the little tiny shity ones you got to do those 1 a.m. spots you going to do a belly room spot that's a big one that's how it is if you are not connect to them they do not laugh and if you are connected it's the greatest cry

the price is only 160 people in there something like that sometimes I go to Largo the cool kids and you know have to be a little more PC you should have a fake act that you do only for Largo like put together I'll actually I why did Largo with the Whitney I like Largo someone else maybe I'm right no Adam DeVine and was fun time and it's really fun Largos a really interesting old place to but all those those are all seen things like I would love if somebody did they put an act together that's only for like that crowd but it's like just onion ask nuff that sneaks through you know that right it's a really like a guy who plays like the strongest Ally possible for everything for Trans rides gay rights black Riot swim

rides like the Ultimate Ally, everything right really good jokes right really good jokes like that would be an interesting project almost like a Borat type project like create an ALT comic who's who's really calculated who's really probably just trying to get pussy but but but puts together the right words you know if you don't support intersectionality then get the fuck out of my face like some and then he should try to get laid after every show us part of the characters with Coke and needles he's got shaky bottles of bills can I fix a pussy hat off his head and starts foot on it backstage flashlight for a pussy hat oh my God

where is character but the thing about people is who are you really and when you're like when you're talking to people do you know who you are do you sure you know who you are like are you a hundred percent certain and cooling, don't think most of us are like most of us are like constantly evolving the way we behave in think consulate thinking about it maybe things went wrong last night I got to stop drinking is always like something I got to get my ass to the gym there's always something you try to improve and move around so if you are a person who is you know if you don't know exactly where you're coming from but you want to sell that you know where you're coming from you want people to believe you know where you coming from then when you get all this momentum behind you

and don'ts can't get away from it you know what you're you're like really see that's a lot of with people that are trying to be spiritual

whether we should sell you on the idea of their spiritual always pushing those this is me man this is me by Kishore I sure I got them who we are all of us is a lot of it is like who we've encountered and how we've interacted with those people he and then the uniform comes along with it and a diet is like a whole follow this manual that mean at least talk about hipsters which you know it's a pretty wide umbrella about what kind of hipsters there are but just the idea of wearing a uniform always kind of puts me off on people I have you stopped you stop growing if you're going to put on what all the other people that you want to be like or wearing your this is the thing is like the opinions aren't necessarily wrong because they're your opinion but the thing is the thing of any kind of ideology whether to Hipster all ideology or if it's a fucking conservative right-wing farmworker ideology

adopt those very little deviation entirely about what they're saying they just know what is going to get the right positive reaction from their Clan I feel bad my mom who is you know we grew up for a pretty liberal family in New York my dad was in radio and he talked Politics on the air and it was pretty far left

reading that you know my mom worked at the New York Times you can't get any more liberal than that and so is then she moved down to Florida where everybody watches Fox News in her building and they all sit around the pool and a fucking buried her because they don't agree with them and I just said good for you Mom you haven't cuz a lot of people go down there and they were they change their views because they are so you know intimidated by not fitting in with its your social group two different country Florida's different country like I was saying American Europe if not three because you've got the locals which I put them against Mississippi and Alabama for being Deep South yes and then you've got the retired people which is old juice from New York and then you've got the Latino element Florida it's very it's three different kind lot of old Italians from New York to all those people just said fuck this winter

can get in the boat and especially that's like all that mean might as well be any other Southern State and then I'll City it's like an international City that's in America that be that is so different in Seattle like in terms of feel and like the way you walk around everybody's like Fanning in tight clothes and party in fucking dancing and music coming out of cars like whoa that's a live and it's going to be underwater soon when they get a suit and when the moon is in certain positions in Florida doesn't even matter with Tide is this sucking if it is a high tide and no storm they still Street still flood in Miami get bad

well here's they got to do it they're going to dig under the city and then lift it up pants right let's go all the way under Elon Musk use that tunnel machine thing going to put some giant metal bars it just Jack it out chick chick chick chick chick

yeah I got the Italians down there they do construction but what if they do in New Orleans deal with a put up a levy to do Jesus Christ I think the problem with that though what I read was that there's something about the poorest nature of the soil in Miami that the water is going to come to the ground the ground of the cities of South Flores Washington for the area is largely Boris live Jamie's on the ball largely porous Limestone which means water will eventually rise up through it so they're fucked they're fucking are what you going to let either fucked that water just going to get through the ground right after you know how like you're on the beach and you can dig a hole in the sand and eventually hit water

that always freaked me out I know I have whatever this water under your how much water for my kid was sitting in one of those holes and I'm like you're going to get fucking sucked underground yeah I didn't like it but in like it I was just listen to Radiolab podcast on quicksand was really cool podcast because it made me think I want ya nobody worried about quicksand anymore is that a real kids do DJ Suki watery Sandy shit and if you don't try to swim out of it if you try to walk out of it you could drown you can die in their people have definitely. And you might not even get out if you try to swim out but that's how you handle it handle it the same way you handle water and which are walking through a hat like people just get sucked into the murk mean if you if you happen to think about this like a certain amount of density to what you need to stand on right that's why I Mudd it's not hard because we just go in there and you can get released

right love is more watery than that then what happens will then you can't even stand then you won't

people just panicked what yeah you got to swim if you can because there's all this weight on you too you have to realize that that's tough dense so it's watery but it's also Kevy and then your clothes are covered in it yeah so your clothes become really heavy and so nobody can save you because if they get closer going to fall in yes you know if you're going to drag them down Man is Hard to swim with somebody you know that as well as anybody you say if somebody is in Costa Rica and we were down at this shit this water is the biggest waterfall ever saying it was like hundreds of feet high and it landed in this Lagoon this round Lagoon and the water they told you don't go near the water and so there's these Japanese girl sitting on the edge they got their feet in and then one of them like jumps in and the water fucking sucks her down immediately and I don't have the lifeguarding degrade from when I was stoned in 16 and so I dove into the water and I grabbed her and luckily

I was checking them out because they were these beautiful Japanese I had my eyes on them and so I dive in and I grabbed I grabbed her and I pulled it in the surface I do the cross arm carry and I pull up I pull her out and you know what you did just turned turn to her friends they all I can solder nobody said thank you I fucking saved your life so anyway so there was these kids

how about a little she died. In Japanese Japanese Japanese Japanese Japanese she probably thought you were a lifeguard with my family and they didn't see it happen so I was so fucking bummed that we get to the parking lot and that this is busload of kids from school and they had seen the whole thing and they started chatting hero to me right now

that's it that's got to be a great feeling even if they didn't say thank you saved them superhero

not not directly maybe you did this podcast rally did I bet those people that have been suicidal at her this and it's you're the mom I bet it ruined a few people to let's be honest

you should do everything I do don't listen to me I'm a fucking idiot why you listening to me

because if people say I changed their life okay if I accept it on the positive then I have to accept it on the negative 2 that's right you did it you did the whole thing yeah you might get some shit that you enjoyed I'm I'm very happy for that and I talked to some people that brought you some great information I'm very happy for that to We're All in This Together I'm not saving anybody's save yourself listen to me call the hotline don't even do it don't go to fucking carbs don't do Jiu Jitsu you going to get hurt when I get hurt

in 40 year old man was trying to choke people for stop it don't listen to me I need mushrooms your break your head once you go crazy like that guy from Pink Floyd huh what if you go crazy what if you never come back

but the thing is what if you do like for sure some people have smoke too much pot and below in the fucking gasket let's be honest right there finding my wife just told me this yesterday she read this article about people with schizophrenia are getting older and they're smoking pot more because it's legal and they're finding people are coming in with schizophrenic episodes from smoking too much pot that were schizophrenic or ready or became schizophrenic from the pot not sure I think when you especially when you get to high it feels exactly like being crazy and I think when there's been moments for sure that I smoke too much pot and I freaked the fuck out and when that happens it it almost always feels like wow if I had a live life like this and that's one of things I tried to take into consideration when it when I think about people having something wrong with the way their brain Pro

this information or the way they talk is like thing about how you feel when you're on like a 200 mg edible and you're like oh my God I just can't do this is just too much everything is like anxiety in the freak out in life and death in all of your memories pouring back in your head like a waterfall you can't collect Circle spinning plates and all you and please and lie down here when you take a shower and helps in the shower you still freaked out if that was your whole life so you got to think what is what's your State of Consciousness versus another person's you have to guess I don't I've never been in your mind I don't know how your mind works have to guess that your mind is some reasonable it's got something like the way my mind works the way you look at life and we talked about so many things we agree on so many things I got to think your processing is very similar to mine

but there's going to be people out there where it's chaos where it's just like you would a 200 mg edible you just like the fuck all day it's just I just people watching me like and they can escape escape the escape the trapped in this is fucking constant Snowball Effect of anxiety and chaos and you got to wonder like what how much of that is brain chemistry how much does brain chemistry that's been adjusted by nature and by life experiences and abuse and all these different factors that happen to people that make them lose their grip on the street and you just know there's a woman that is near my house she's at a bus stop and she's been at this bus stop for 3 years and I have never and I passed her two or three times a day and I checked I'm kind of obsessed with checking on her every time I drive by and she's never not been

Anapa stop sitting down she's either reading or just under a blanket she's chain smokes I don't know where she gets a cigarettes she got a cell phone don't know how she charges it but I guess you just the bathroom at the gas station maybe just maybe people give her money and she doesn't beg doesn't engage just sits at this and itself is that she's in front of the gas station and a busy road it's it's a worse spot is it pouring rain she's out there cold winter she's out there crazy

does the bus stop have a cover but not not like a besides they're not there so I'm driving rain it's you know so she just fuck man I see you're talking to yourself a little bit and you just think Jesus Christ and so I looked her up online I researched her in and it turns out she's from Venice she went to Venice High and she's got she's got parents in the neighborhood and they know she's there they can't get her to leave social workers come by and they just realized she's happy there you know not happy but if she's safe there something about that spot maybe cuz it's like the busiest spot around and makes her feel safe

Madison at you kid

yeah magic kid blows a gasket and you got to let go at a certain point fuck you can't make them take their medication after the age of 18 and for some reason a lot of skitzofrenic still like taking their medication cuz the way it makes them feel god dammit

what are the other options mining lithium is the main drug and then there's a couple other ones that work is there any behavioral therapy or physical therapy is right I think it's about replacing thoughts it's cognitive behavioral therapy they have to when they start thinking something they have to replace it with another thought and I have to train in that until they can stop the the voices but I did but I think it's mostly medication I think we have an aversion to treating the brain say when we treat other things that get broken like you know a few

if something wrong with your liver they you've got liver disease or going to give you medication for the liver do something wrong with your brain like you sure you sure there's something wrong with your brain know what's wrong with your brains really not producing enough chemicals is that it or is it just the way you look at things because sometimes it is sometimes we were weak but sometimes that's not it sometimes there's something wrong and so if you are person who's got something wrong and people are telling you just week this is fucked up like this is this this is a terrible feeling in this is every day for me all day there's just something wrong going on there but it has to be that there's variables do when your brain works just wide like this variables to the way your eyes function or any other part of your body does vet give me just it's not equal everybody get the same dose right I mean depression

it's something that it's funny cuz I think I've asked you and you don't have depression and my my my buddy Mike Givens he's my best friend and we can act like you and me and everything but I have so much fucking depression that I deal with it everyday you know and I can't I have to meditate I got to exercise I you know

Medicaid everything do you while you're injured right now you can't work it out right. Affect you when you decide to help you not exercising when you do exercise a lot does it a alleviate your symptoms and feel very much really recommended it and yeah BMS strength transcranial magnetic stimulation for 10 weeks every single day really yeah I just did it this morning you do it to yourself now you go in for an MRI in a map out your brain and the whole theory behind it is that they can use magnetic stimulation to sort of like waking up one of the lobes in your brain is associated with depression and so you go in and force him up at your brain and then you go in and for like a half hour they just pulse this magnetic thing onto your head it's like a very low-grade MRI

I almost and I've had amazing results and It Last Forever you know you go through this cycle of it and then he kneels have the same experience that's crazy and forever they say some people have to come in and get it get a tune up but generally it's the one time there's a woman in cats and gone off she's one of the UFC bantamweight sand she fought UFC champion Amanda Nunez back in the day and actually beat her before she won the title but in that fight she got hurt real bad and she talked about it on the podcast that she she developed a bunch of brain issues after that fight cuz like her cortisol levels are all fucked up and hormones are all fucked up to develop thyroid problem to hit in the head so hard I couldn't keep weight off trying to figure out what the fuck is wrong with her and want two things that helped her the best talked about it really openly an in-depth on the podcast 1 things that help with the best was they have this

I think it's a different kind of magnetic therapy than this one cuz I think this is only don't the Centre only exists around San Diego and a lot of military guys come back and use it football players people had injuries and someone recommended it to her and it helped her tremendously really brought it back because electric shock therapy with pretty good results but a lot of side effects did you get hit in the head a lot when you were a kid sometimes

is it was raining like moments would you get knocked out get hit with a bat or a really hurt doing that never that my back my neck is still fucked up to this day from a from a check a head check that I made but no I don't think I ever had any concussions my friend Mark I'm sorry my mind runs in the family my mom my dad's got it it's it's it's very genetic depression though I'm sure it is but I think it's accentuated by trauma even though you probably I mean I know you played a lot of hockey hit it with you probably don't think about it like every time you Collide and even falling down slamming into the walls and she like that all that stuff rattled your brain concussion from getting hit in the chest sometimes it says EEG and vitals for my rmd of streets FDA-approved treat migraines depression improves anxiety PT

dtb I sleep ADHD excetera excetera now accepting Insurance in Tricare mindset Rancho Bernardo check them out and this is you can find us on cat zingano's Twitter page she's got a picture of her with this apparatus on her head but I know it helped her effective it helped her a lot to talk about the what's pouring was like before and afterwards she asked your coordination is off shoes that's one of things that happen to people when they get brain damage if they get knocked out or in a bad concussion to see Yuri your system is not firing correctly so you'll see their bodies not moving right so it almost resets resets to hard drive damaged yes damaged the signals aren't getting to the muscles correctly was so if you see one of the things that you see an older boxers when they're taking too many horrible fights and they're really starting to lose it is baby steps look shorter than legs look closer together they have it on there having a harder time moving

don't have the confidence to have the balance to move around and that they're there their systems short-circuiting you know when you're seeing it in their coordination it's a weird thing to see to I've seen it and Fighters why I remember them in their Prime and then I see them now I'm like woah just to two possibilities could be an injury they could be dealing with injury but if you find out there's no injury you like this is not good just look at Ben Roethlisberger out there in the pocket when he tries to run it is like little steps to know moving to the shoulders and that guy used to be fast back there but he's gotten hit a lot just no getting away from it man it is what it is. Have you had a knocked out unconscious I got stopped and kickboxing match I got hit with a big left hook my legs went out from under me is crazy what did even hurt it was like a like because you're full of adrenaline so we don't feel it in terms of like a ouchie not like a couch eat her right it's like it wasn't like

painful thing it was like being and then my legs are stopped working like what what the fuck that was the hardest I ever been had cuz I was just on the button it was a perfect I zigged when I should as I was exhausted already it is with third fight of the day

the kickboxing tournament and just prank and my lights just went whoopsies knocked out Super Lucky but I definitely got hit in the head a bunch and I know I didn't get knocked out there's a lot of sparring there's a lot of them punched in the face there's a lot of getting kicked in the head less Kick In The Head believe it or not cuz I was terrified always moving fast do you know we wear these things the first tournament switch to wear these things in the back of the head and that that was so when you get knocked out your fucking head doesn't bounce too hard off the ground I'm not bullshiting if there's a video of me fighting with one of those on is a video of me on YouTube that's I've got this spot in the back of my head that looks like a like a bald spot like I would have if I had here now but it's a yamaka it's a red plastic thing it's hard to tell cuz it's a shitty video but that red plastic thing is basically like a spongy thing that they used to use in Taekwondo terms cuz we was first it was no

padding and then eventually they made people start wearing these helmets and they basically these cushiony helmets that go over the top of the head and you got to strap them out and see how that guys wearing it the white guy to see the guys in the background or the right side that's when the white thing that's the standard one what I'm wearing just a pat on the back of my head is like a red thing in the back of my head in case I got ko'd cuz I'm we're fighting on a fucking this is a basketball court is it wood floor that was overproduction that was Me Knocking that guy out

just meet this is me when I'm 19 so these this was where we fought all the time we always fought on hardwood floors one time I see the Bay State Games I find the basic games we fought on a tarp that was laid out over a cement floor yeah and I knocked a guy out in his head bounced off the cement oh my God kick this dude in the head in his head bounced off some I'll never forget that sound like I was 19 I didn't know what the fuck to do this is where the tournament was is okay is okay we're going to do this we going to fight here today I would like are you guys out of your fucking mind I would I would be screaming if I went with my kid and he was supposed to fight in the tournament and I got there and there was a thin plastic tarp stretch out over smooth concrete floor but what the fuck are you talkin about you crazy but you need pads you need people to make sure they don't go out a bouncer I just tarp laid down over concrete

so so dangerous so I definitely got my Noggin rattle but gang of times I don't know how many times I said do gymnastics for like six years start when I was like six oh yeah I could do I used to double backs no no I did I did I train for like six years hard back handspring into a double back to still do that I can I haven't tried a single back in a while but I could do Stockard oustanding backflips until a few years ago. So I so I always wanted to learn how to do that I did I over rotated a flip one time and I fucking slam my head in the match back then when you see floor exercise today it's not even the same sport it's all springboard brought it's like 2 in a paddock what we did it was those fucking rubber you know half inch thick mats that you roll out in the corners come popping up that's what we used to do it

yes you are fucking twisting your ankle all the time landing on that shit how bad you fuck your head up and you ended it was bad by injuries are my ankles Ice to fuck up my hand and you know you can't then you can do anything for a little while so we'll the reason why I keep asking about head trauma is cuz my friend Mark Gordon he's an expert in traumatic brain injury he's an endocrinologist any studies a lot of soldiers is with a bunch of papers on soldiers former football players Fighters work with a bunch of people that have had brain injuries and his conclusion like in a lot of them that were suicidal out of when they're severely depressed and his conclusion is that for a lot of them what happened was damaged the pituitary gland that stopped them from producing hormones correctly and it leads to severe lack of energy depression and its almost always correlated with head trauma and oftentimes head trauma that people forgot about didn't think it's that big of a deal could be literally wiping out on a jet ski

slamming into the water and then and then you're fucked up for years and you don't know why skiing for sure falling down hitting your head snowboarding is really comment I've never snowboarded but apparently went to the board kicks up euphy go up in the air in the fucking head comes from yeah that's how people get got got to wear a helmet and a lot of kids don't yeah I've heard of kids getting fucked up a yeah but so all those things contribute to the foot that your brain is super delicate you know it's really complicated Machinery it's like when you drop your iPhone maybe drop it once how many times you drop your iPhone is it hey hey hey crew fucking case on that thing

where did Chili's drop tests right they do drop test where they drop it over concrete see how good it is your head is similar in that you you can get away with getting racked in the head but I was in Hawaii recently and I dropped my phone the last time do you know that you drop your phone in nose getting a little wonky I need drop it the last time and it's just gone is gone Ville it was just calling people I would I was I was showing someone else had the phone open and I was like watch watch it's on the contacts so I can she's going to start calling people it just tried calling people and I'd hang up and then we just call somebody else to hang out and we just cost to build it was just falling apart it wouldn't let me log in any more like it wasn't it wasn't sensing my fingers hatching screen to put in the key code we should all backed up yeah yeah yeah it was all backed up it was like God dammit god dammit

yeah I just finished my screen I didn't I didn't give a fuck your heads like that that's my point it had like that if I didn't get that one last drop maybe a phone we been all right to the new phones around me that especially with the same phone right Rock smack I'm reading this book now about speaking of changing your brain it's called how to change your mind so God is Michael Pollan yeah yeah he's been on the podcast talking about I don't know shit about the it's it's basically about psychedelics and LSD and mushrooms in particular in the whole fucking history of it no idea how much research was done back in the 50s and 60s collusive studies they were showing with alcoholism people were at 70% of people that underwent these treatments with psychedelics got soul

depression cigarettes cigarettes I mean it's amazing all that shit just got fucking thrown away no corrupt people kept that information away from folks the studies that Nicks and funded like Nixon funded a bunch of studies that showed positive benefits of marijuana how is that right I get out of here with this shit not releasing this is that it got squashed by by shrinks because they had a vested interest in people not going into the woods for a weekend and coming back without their depression so yeah so they so they disqualified all the studies go fuc yeah what psychiatrist were like horrified that there was these kind of results we're coming back do you wasn't that for sure or was it people who've never taking psychedelics horrified that people are out there experimenting with their Consciousness cuz I think a lot of these psychiatrist or probably really straight lace guys and so and they're mine especially

in the you know Shadows of Reefer Madness and all the propaganda date heard in the thirties and forties and when you look at those people and they're out there in the fucking desert or wherever they're going dancing around taking mushrooms under the Moonlight like they're blowing his brains out here you got to stop this their straight-laced people have never done psychedelics they might not be in cahoots it might more likely be a bunch of people to think it's a fucking terrible idea to let people run around taking acid well there was just some of the medical journals came out with with pieces saying that the none of these studies are valid because there wasn't

I forget what it is about studies that have to be consistent but the other thing is it was political and you had Timothy Leary who is you know the worst thing to happen to this kind of testing because he was saying was it drop drop out turn on drop out and that whole idea they said you know where people taking LSD you're not going to fight your Wars and so that became a threat to the status quo and that's when the law starts come out

huh it's interesting because you also got a lot of people to get excited about it right yeah but he got he took it away from it being a a medical process and he made it about you know enlightening but in a kind of fluffy spiritual way will he made it a big movement right I think you saw that he was probably going to change the world that movement kind of did definitely had a big impact or all those people that took acid but think about if you really stop and think about Apple and you really look at

the fact that Apple see job said that take an acid was like one of the greatest things that ever happened to me that was as is famously talked about it

and who knows what and what an impact that had on him deciding to start apple and what would an impact apple is had in the technology world as a straight line from people starting to take all the stuff because it was happening in Silicon Valley this whole psychedelic movement was like right in that area and he says that it you know Bill Gates apparently took it once but all those guys were coming in and they were you know that there were these people that would lead it was a guy named

Hubbard well Ram Dass is mentioned also but who is really like you know of corporate version of LSD he was going to companies and he was taking the CEOs of companies and taking them in for these three day drop acid experiences

corporate acid weather kind of doing that a burning man how is that not a lot but there's some cool companies to go to burning man you know

what's this Alfred Matthew Hubbard he's an early proponent of the drug LSD during the 1950's he is reputed to be the Johnny Appleseed of LSD and the first person to emphasize LED lsds potential as a Visionary or transcendental drug but this guy had on the fucking life somebody's got to do a movie about his life he he was like working for the government's he was a double agent he was he was he he started with nothing nowhere I think before before during and after he had like a different careers and he was like a spy and he bought it he started with nothing and ended up with like a bunch of airplanes that he was leasing out came a millionaire and then spent it all trying to educate people on LSD he was worth by tens of millions of dollars and he ended up broke at the end

wow yeah wow

offer the LSD he believed in it so strongly that said it was going to change the world and it would have it may still now there's now it's coming back well there was a little hiccup or several Generations how to pass before people start understanding that there's there's a risk to everything there's a risk to sports there's a risk to every fucking thing you do driving your car is a risk of psychedelics there's also a reward I think if you're going to be honest you have to look at both of them you have to look at the potential risk you have to look at the reward and they're not looking at the reward to try this too many people out there that are trying to deny the reward and you got to find out why and in this day and age and might be a conspiracy it might be some pharmaceutical industry that doesn't want it to be legal because it would undermine their profits it might be it might be some law enforcement unions that think it's a bad idea to make less things illegal to take you no prisons yeah it'll take people away

in on terms of the amount of people that we need for the job that you know which I think that's another story but

when you don't want

people look at that kind of stuff and you look at bike the the underlying

sort of patterns that we follow in this country you know the patterns are you happy or not happy with the way things go the way things are run

in what sense just in any sense in all of it

I trust that we do have the best system out there and we challenged it every day and I still think that we live in a place where the tenants of our society are in place for sure they switch one way or the other but I still believe in democracy and I think the internet as an as an overall thing has been positive for people getting their voices out and for your information. But the idea that we were faced with that in this day and age is grown adults telling other grown adults what they can and can't put in their body and then not being honest about the benefits that's where it gets squirrelly that's where the whole thing falls apart but you're just a guy like if you and I are the only two people on the planet and came out I'm not going to let you take that acid why

well because it's illegal look I wrote it down can I take the acid that would be Preposterous but somehow or another it works when there's a million people that a person can tell you don't know if you're a fucking grown adult you can't tell me what I can take that's stupid if you can't prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that what I'm going to take is going to fuck with you if you can't prove that then stop it look if someone does something take something and doesn't it take PCP and they've run face-first through a fucking 7-Eleven window that's on them that's on their actions it doesn't mean you shouldn't be able to try PCP and I don't think you should try PCP I think one another enough people smash the windows and go crazy. Hey maybe that's a drug I should fucking a boy but that's how you find out about that you like grown adults make their own decisions and if you're the one who's making the decisions for all the grown adults you better have some real fucking logic to what you're saying and turn this is don't and this is the same society that allows the Pharmaceuticals to Peddle o p

it's two people for the last 30 years saying that it was the greatest thing you could do exactly I think it's good that they make money because they make medicine that helps a lot of people they're not all bad I think in general Pharmaceuticals have helped people in tremendous ways but you can't deny that if there's some way shape or form that people are influencing other people having access to beneficial things because it would impact their profit line that's that's evil that's evil you have a lot of fucking money if you really going out of your way to hire lobbyists to make sure that mushrooms don't get on the table come on man you're a fucking real problem that's a real problem I look at yin and yang this is this is the opposing forces they were battling to try to get total complete freedom of your Consciousness these are the opposing forces their ignorance.

psychiatrist I guarantee you the psychiatrist were worried about correlations between psychotic episodes and psychedelic drug use and they're worried about people falling apart and they're right there right this is the one that wanted to get it illegal to write it's like working on backflips when there's a fucking thin pad onto you yeah you can fall on your head and you're right because I don't do gymnastics people follow their head what are the ten falls on their head you're not doing to me. Falling on your fucking head right it's the same thing same thing so people worried about it that don't really have experience in it I can't lie to you most of those psychiatrist just didn't have experience in it or we're super cautious folks so controlling

ghetto set and setting they keep talking about you know and realizing that the the you know occurrence of a psychotic episode is so much lower when it's you know when you're when it's being dispensed the right way so much lower

never been LED through it by somebody. When you did Ayahuasca was there like a guy Aubrey my friend Aubrey acted as a sound like set the setting

in a way where was I would say like spiritual like not. Redic not over-the-top but just announcing your intentions that we're going into this we going in this we going to let go I'm going to give thanks to all the spirits around isn't all the energy around us just go into this with the good intention give be grateful be going to it with gratitude and then the way it hits you it hits you like

like a infinite Cyclone of geometric patterns in impossible colors just blasting in your brain instantaneously like

going into it with the intention of letting go is probably one of the best piece of advice you could give people to avoid a freak out Let Yourself Go and it's was trying to do is your ego is trying to wrestle with this grizzly bear this enormous short faced bear on steroids is trying to your Eagles trying to wrestle with is impossible to resist and that's what leads to a lot of people freaking out losing your ego is the ultimate goal of it I don't think anybody ever really lose my think you you keep it in check you lose some of it you keep some of it because that's the part of your survival mechanism of the real problem is like having a healthy ego you know like

like if your wife looks good she's looking at yourself in the mirror says I got to look at it you look fucking great I do look good but she feels good feels every that's ego right you want to know you you look good but it's not a bad ego it's fun and I'm saying the real problem is when it gets out of control and toxic then it will make other people see any like who you know what you see gross gross Behavior gross selfishness you see that and that's the bad part of the ego that's what I'm saying but the key is to know which is which and that's hard it's hard to know which is which which one is the overwhelming Force inside your mind which one is the one that's controlling your Consciousness in your behavior in which is is the good one of the bad one is it the fun healthy one or is it the one that is so you know could completely obsessed with yourself and only yourself you don't know until you have these experiences and then the the the nature of them gets exposed like take some down

the roots and you start thinking about all where did all this come from like where is it where's all what's the source of all this like oh there's a validation issue there's a this issue is a trust issue there's a you know that whatever the fuck it is it's swirling out of that in this unnatural form they create the negative

behavior that you are manifesting in your life like it all that comes or something in one of the things about psychedelic experiences is it shut it like it shut the eagle off 42nd and what you stand outside of and go look at things doing you

like if you're hanging out with someone he's like yeah you know Sean Penn was at my house last night man name dropping by that name for like it doesn't really work yeah everybody knows your name dropping Steven Spielberg thing like if you told me you went over Sean Penn's house I'd like what do you like like then it wouldn't be named dropping like if you did it wouldn't be named dropping like if you told me like I was hanging out with you with tan Tana doing home how weird because it's the beginning of a story I'm not just going to let that let that hang name dropping with stories that go with it but you know there are comedians that are really like guileless about just bringing a name in or bringing up a project they worked on

and you look back at the jail can you go could have told that joke without telling me that a Frank Sinatra was in the audience that night yes exactly yeah do that when he was coming up in Boston he was the guy he was the guy that young hot guy in Boston and I mean that dude you put his name on the Marquee and he was fucking one year at a college and he was this cute guy with a Southern accent and the base El Cap on and he was silly and he would fill up a fucking room and he would just and then he started to get some success and it always found his way in his act you would talk about it yeah you know I was talking to this act when I was doing Chicago on Broadway and no not Chicago what was he do Oklahoma he did Oklahoma on Broadway when he was like 24 years old and and you know and then he just started in heat got him with that with the River Phoenix and he did like three rivers

Phoenix movies and he was fucking good and then somehow he got into the TV root and didn't follow the filmer but he's a he's a good actor you remember he had Boston Common number that is a sitcom and that didn't go it went for a little while to go cancelled and it was a show that was all his right and then he went to do yes dear they did yes dear for a long time with Dan Aykroyd where Dan Aykroyd was a priest I maybe they were both priests really yeah yes dear was on Hood 784 a Soul Man soul man so that dude and his his quote for episode was very high from the get-go and he just kept buying real estate

well that's that's what he does now right I haven't I haven't talked to in awhile think already sold real estate now

I would like to Anthony he was a murderer back and boss hard it was to see him at Faneuil Hall in and fill that fucking place when they moved when blooming right took over in the move to the big room. A little tiny room and put it in Faneuil Hall I went walking through there one day and Anthony Clark was murder in and I was like this 90% women so weird yeah I was not right for women to not come and see him God's love him to don't get me wrong but women really loved him but he was so cute you know well they say that's the secret to being a draw is appeal to women because they're the ones that decide what to do at night yeah right

I just not a whole lot of chicks begging to go to Slayer

bright and if they are that's it that's a good one they want to go see someone cute I bet this is probably a disproportionate number chicks going to see Aquaman I bet if you if you looked at the number of women that want to go see a Superhero Movie and the number women that want to go see Aquaman off-the-chart study that's a handsome man Jason Momoa he was Bad Ass Game of Thrones he's a beast to super nice guy too I'm a guy and a Whole Foods in a of sweetheart

sort of telling your sweetheart is like you're so handsome confusing so call him beautiful I'm following him and feelings really that guy my wife said it best she said he's everybody's type

she's like you know some girls Brad Pitt's their type you know some girls it's you know fill in the blank

CD 75 look at that he's everybody's type

and he's a giant and he's got awesome tattoos real tattoos

the leather forearm ones I think is his real tattoos

boy that take some time and make up because if he's doing a role where they don't want that that's a lot of time covering that shit up everyday I don't think they have to cover up shit with him at that beautiful face get on-screen that all those damn panties do the talking

see you again tomorrow man yeah girls are going to that movie theater in Times Square in the 70s for women's probably yourself off all these little heaters your feet are stuck on the floor you think it's the popcorn butter nope nope nope yeah how do we get on subject damn

Aquaman girls aren't deciding what to go see that girls would be there be like yeah I want to stare at Jason Momoa

he's pretty beautiful you watching on screen right I mean the number of women with

sketchy childhoods that are attracted MMA fighters coming off the chart as I can say it

I think even regular women lawyers like button-down women and he's a UFC middleweight champion

beautiful 6136 with for someone that rains glass Futures look like a model after a fight before the beast but point is there's guarantee that one about with blue shorts on when you see is

yeah he's got a good build that's the kind of build my wife like she doesn't like it too big to like me and him slow around you and him of the same the fuck

are you sure girls are watching that guy though like okay here's another one George St-Pierre hundred percent of that beautiful body is Beautiful beat women away from me I'm busy I am busy so that picture up there was throwing a punch

the one right there by that I mean you don't think girls would be begging to have that inside of them could be like fuck yes I'd like a drink goddamn you savage let's do this after you fuck me I don't get too drunk I want to feel it still

yeah

had a go at 4 if they are some of the players some of the fighters want to talk about that are you kiss and tell each one other thing is interesting is female Fighters right that I was reading a story about a husband whose white who's a trainer think his wife is a boxer nose read the story about him like his experience like bring her to the ring but getting her is his wife is in there just going to knuckle up with some other chicken and maybe get really fucking hurt and to be there while this is all happening

that's a wild that's a wildlife female fighter is a wild creature you guys think a male fighter it's like almost all boys somewhere the back of their head have this

ridiculous fantasy of being able to fuck everybody out in a fight a bunch of people just want to do that that's too much it's too dangerous to scare fuck this and most people don't do it but for women to have that is probably way more rare to have this desire to see really fat people are probably way more rare maybe like let's meet generous and say 20% of the the number that men would want to fuck people or maybe 20% of that is like the number that would be women so then how many of them go through with it how many of them go through with it and get to be like a cat zingano or get to be like in Amanda Nunes like Jesus Christ. Number so small so small in terms of the general population those are some wild humans they get to that stage where they're fighting in a fucking cage for a living Holly Holm

is a crazy way to make a living if they make it that far either even more vicious than men cuz they've Dave you know that there's such a social taboo for them for men it's like oh that's badass you're an MMA fighter but for women everybody just thinks it's weird and they think there's something wrong with you what's become more acceptable but it's still terrifying especially for men that don't train like to it for a man who doesn't train and he's like around Miesha Tate she's really hot and she had also fuck people like they get weirded out like imagine that broke the fuck you up but she's hot and she could fuck you up that's not nice guys probably love people like that are tied up and overpowered what are the odds that a girl knows how to fuck people I was looking for that kind of guy almost zero that's true Alpha

have a good day to do is Bank it like Luke rockhold you shoot a lot of foreign Bank it and then have it release after he retired from his career cuz right now it's just going to get in the way a distraction but he knows that this 401K my porn

yeah it's up the numbers of women that become Elite Fighters over a wonder what it is in terms of like the amount that try it and then the amount become fully successful

I bet it's a tiny tiny percentage like to get all the way through like how many how many men when you when you were going out how many guys either wanted to learn how to box or wrestle or do some kind of thing in my town but a lot of kids you knew were into it right oh yeah how many girls

I can't think of any super rare but the martial arts classes did have a lot of girls coming interesting as a good number it wasn't half but it might have been 20% I might be 20% women that were in those classes because they wanted to learn self-defense you know

I put my daughter in Taekwondo just choose not into it but I go just do a year just to give you some sense of facing somebody oven light happens and some sense of what it's like to struggle with someone physically they have the older you are when you start learning that the more difficult it is to incorporate into your the way you think about things young if you have some experience with martial arts you'll be more calm and confident something happens when you get older your body develop knowing how to move that way when you're already like kind of set in your ways and you're injured and you're older than someone wants to teach you a wheel kick like Christ being able to do backflips but you could still do a backflip

your body learn how to do that when you were young in their programs in there and there's a there's a moment of faith when you do a backflip wear when you go up you have to go up before you go back and that's the first mistake in the constant mistake is People to People go to do a backflip and they lunge backwards on their head but you really have to trust that you have to shoot your hand up back and then you pull it in Dover damn it's like that with the martial arts moves that are does a moment of faith when I don't train for a long time then I try to do a turning side kick on the heavy bag there's like a moment like okay I'm going to hit this thing right what am I doing here

it's big ass knife shit that's not good to have around right there

what am I 12 keep his big giant knife on the table be at when I when I do it today to this day I have to do it slow a couple times and get the feel of it haven't trained in a while and then then then it becomes a normal mad as hell are you fucking knees I got a new knee thing going on because the third time I've had to get stem cells injected into this meniscus tear meniscus tear and it develops into a cyst that the tear we've hit it with stem cells a few times and it doesn't give me any pain anymore but assist keeps developing in that area at the sis has to get punctured and Drain King smaller and smaller it happened three different times were how to get a drained and the last time was a few days ago and it was the smallest ever been but still fucking annoying but you're still running yep doesn't hurt when you run I'm taking time off right now taking a little bit of time off right now I'm going to take a couple weeks off and I'm going to run

at a slower Pace skip the dogs some exercise and I'm going to be more just more cautious about not going to push myself I'm trying to figure out what it is I'm doing that's causing this sister recur I think it's just overall pounding a little over the hill running kicking the bag all that shitt I need to let it fully set in before I go back to doing that shit so I'm just doing a bunch of other different stuff now lot of yoga is cryogenics help help someone you know what would Crouch and it's a really good for his first was really good for your mood if you've never done it before the best kind of the Conway York you get your whole body in there not just your neck down the neck Downs okay it's definitely better than nothing but the real feeling is when your head's under and your whole body is like immersed in this

are that schooled buy liquid nitrogen it's fucking freezing dude I want to do it's a freak out man it's a freak out how long do you stay in 40 minutes and then I stay out for 10 minutes and I do another 3 minutes yeah you feel amazing afterwards well we'll fix it it'll reduce information now but norepinephrine that's why it's called write the word

sure that stuff gets radically boosted in your brain that helps a lot of people with arthritis lot of people who have a lot of inflammation it helps him is that I say it ramps that shit up you feel so good when you get out of here like we would last awhile to adjust freezing to death you were freezing to death you're on your way to death and you step out of any like wow and just everything is filled really feels good man it feels good yeah I fucking love swimming pool water at amazing for you the way you feel when you get out too but here's the thing it's not the best thing to do if your trying to gain muscle weight you have to wait a while after the exercise like there's apparently there's there's a bunch of different studies and I know Andy Galpin it's been involved in a bunch of these studies and Rhonda Patrick is discuss some of this research as well

but what would happens if there's a window of time after you lift weights we should just leave your body alone and not ice anyting and that this is more beneficial to gaining strength and and explosiveness and mass and stuff like that but that after a window of time then it's beneficial to get into the the ice bath or to do cry or something like that you want to give yourself your body a. Of time to physiologically adjust to the work like your body knows what's happened right you're graded deadlifts today okay okay okay we got all the way to get everything in place but if you freeze it right there then it has an effect on the overall might be butchering this but I think it has effect on the overall amount of games you can make calls to the muscle the way it would

figure out a Google that one how do you do that one yeah post-workout cryotherapy and hypertrophy cuz that's what they're that's what they're trying to dig through their trying to figure out whether or not it's beneficial or not in that case

so you think that it's really good for the mood and it's really good for people with joint issues a lot of folks that go there they have like a back surgery or back issues and it gives me a lot of relief and you can do it everyday to cuz it's only three minutes to think about something like that as it's not it's not like any other kind of therapy like you can't do it any longer it's not like you're being a pussy cuz you're only doing it for 3 minutes but you can't even do 3 minutes about the first time you go in there 2 minutes like fuck this

the two minutes about ready to bail but then your body will get used to it then you could do three minutes but it's it's very controversial because a woman died in Vegas was operating it herself and apparently she was not in the right height and the liquid nitrogen was getting into her her long she was breathing it in your past out and she passed out and froze to death terrifying cuz she had I think the story wasn't she at work there and you know she was after hours just doing therapy on herself and she fucking fell asleep in there they should never do that by yourself if you do it at a reputable Place always be someone standing by watching while you're in they stand outside the door while you're inside of it

scary though did you realize when you're in there you like this is this is something you can't survive for that long Survivor for a few minutes but you you're literally exposing yourself to something that is 100% fatal if you stay in it cold water in freezing cold water they say the amount of hours you can survive in water is like surprisingly warm yeah it's like in the 40s you can die after a couple hours yet I'm throwing numbers out but nobody prize at Ya getting wet is one of the most dangerous things you can ever happen to you if you're in the winter in the mountains of the most dangerous things you fall into water they actually have rewarming drills that they teach people particularly soldiers and Outdoorsman that are interested in the shed

my friend John barcklow he works for Sitka that's Premier Outdoor Company they make like a hunting clothes and stuff like that they have a whole video on how to do a rewarming drill and saw what he does is him and his friend jump into a frozen River and then go into a tent and heat themselves back up again you watch this and get your whole body supposed there in the winter and do jump into a river that got to move the ice around and hop in this fucking Frozen stream and then go all the way under and then they come out with their soaked down and other there soap wool clothes and if soaked synthetics and they get into a tent at climbing their sleeping bags and they try to eat themselves up if you have if you have no access to a building a house with no shower know that you're fucked you're out in the woods is very specific things that you have to do in order to survive if you don't follow the right steps you absolutely

die yeah it's really common the kills more people than probably any thing in the woods

freezing to death at movie Revenant freak me out just going into the woods up North for three months to collect pallets and you walking through fucking streams and it's pouring rain and you got no heater no electricity

fuck that yeah that's how people. Lot of people live that way to a lot of people live that way until they died

I mean. Do you think about those people that made it across this country and the people like Lewis and Clark and all these Pioneers they just didn't even know what the fuk was around the next corner of his walked on through with what they have like donkeys with shit on their back how much food do you have your going mountain and you got to double back and go around Christ no Google Earth

no nothing shit Maps dogshit math written by people you'd hope knew what the fuck they were talking about

I know how to get maps from Native Americans get maps from a sailor try to figure it out and then you randomly go into the wrong territory and Indians want to kill you you know there's an interesting film that's out on Netflix right now The Ballad of Buster Scruggs first movie and it's all about that about the old were the other cars like on Brothers Big Lebowski one of my all-time favorite they've just made so many cool weird film but this one's really weird like a bunch of non-connected stores I thought they were connected but they're not just all taking place in the same time. All the old west and the end pretty similar if they're all fucking dark and you got to go into it I would highly recommend it but go into it knowing it's going to be fucking dark you got to go there just accept it but Tom Waits his one is fucking amazing amazing amazing

dude is so good

that one that was really good that the singer guy was really good I love that he want to spoil that but now it's you they're all they're all great was the end of it I was like what the fuck did I just watch did you ever watched Edgewood about Deadwood is I watched it once and they were swearing so much that my bullshyt alarm that's why I stopped watching it was like I don't think people talk like that back then because they didn't talk like that in the fifties and the sixties she like the trend doesn't make sense if people talk like that in the wild west then what where did I go where that girl that all went to the Aether like they had two heads that they raise their children the children around this kind of language and somehow or another it is scaped and it went away and it stopped that's on how the world works the world isn't worth that way the world works in the way that you like you slowly introduce fucked up words and then they become like the word fuck if you said the word fuck on television and then

1950s do you would get arrested right how is that possible on stage years removed from people saying it with abandon constantly I don't believe it I think a better example of what it was probably like is like Gangs of New York and there's probably more accurate but that was probably what people were like right then they were probably brutal as fuck but I bet they didn't swear as much as we like to think they did

the Deadwood thing is like they were using it as a

and I mean maybe I need to go back and watch it before talk shit but it felt like they were using it almost like to modernize it these people talk like scallywag to talk today price still say cursing is cultural like it if you if you're an idiot you know they talked about how black people cursed versus how Protestants cursed coffee yeah somewhere that did you have any weed I have a little bit of this article about it says that they they purposely changed the words because to make it more contemporary because they have been buying old are Nancy like that yeah they got exactly but Vikings

you know my Joey pillaging or what are we doing the fuck man

yo thought the Footloose on this shit let's let loose on these bitches yeah

yeah. See that's why I okay so I'm not wrong

yeah they did it on purpose to bring it back they're making a movie or something or other in the middle of biking one that's on Netflix now I think it's a comedy on my phone cuz I'm Norseman Norseman set it that might be it is that is that a comedy my kids and my wife Crystal little but now suddenly it's okay and they're 15 and 18 but suddenly okay that were at dinner and just fuck it's thrown around all the time

this it Norseman

just going to come in at 5 so I don't know if it's like a full-on bow okay

this is not my kind of thing just based off of that I saw as I have looks like some Monty Python

why not it's good though but I got this might be it

I just too many new shows I can't I can't keep up I now

it's it's like it's great there such high-quality things are so good but it's not great in that I can't give up have you started watching The Marvelous mrs. maisel saw the first season and then maybe one or two of the second season but it just I really like I think she's fucking great obviously the cast Tony Shalhoub but it just got so don't say anything cuz I'm I'm I'm just starting to act up I fucked up and start with season 2 how you did starting with episode 1 season 2 episode 3 Ozark what's wrong with this and that's hilarious so I didn't even know somebody to tell me so we need to tell me the store of a guy who told me but I went back and watch the first episode of season 1 of zico is shit this even better but I thought it was good watching the first episode season 2 not even knowing how she got there cuz I knew was about stand up a new shoes a comic but then going back and watching it from Season 1 online

what does a lot of stuff about how they and writing on a show that's similar and then it's about a comedian starting out on crashing it's I think they really capture the process of somebody brand new finding their voice on stage yeah yeah and the managers gray the woman that plays her manager there's always somebody like that that's in your corner that's helping you develop yourself and that she's she's natural onstage I buy it I buy Herr's a stand-up on stay by her eyes being actually funny and interesting seen Lenny Bruce the guy plays Lenny Bruce is very good by God

who's the who's hurt to

her name is spoiler alert get to see her breasts to calls fantastic by the way good Lord thank you Jesus

I had to do a search but now I did a search on her news just let it go I didn't want to go yeah Rachel Brosnahan and Michael zegen and Al Jolson steel and who is

who's playing Monday Bruce

is that the guy who Kirby Luke Kirby Luke Kirby outstanding he did a great job he sounded like them you know sounds without doing an obvious impression it sounds like he's got the tone right he's got the inflection right it's not overly stylized no no no it's a sign that you believe it he did a great job of seeming like a guy doing stand up in front of a room people not like an actor playing stand-up will the woman that created the show apparently her dad was a stand-up and he knew Lenny Bruce which is why she put them in the series cuz he's the only historical figure in the Shell of the show they take some liberties with the history like they're what I don't think there was a comedy club back then and now this place I don't think that was real I don't think there really was a comedy club back then I think back then people were just doing poetry nights and they were doing you know that would be like a musician than a comedian comedians with hosts

I don't think there was necessarily a comedy club I think that came later yes I catch a rising star came out of being a cabaret and you know people would sing there and then suddenly people started doing stand-up there in the two existed together for years before it became a comedy club in should we should actually know this why do we not know what was the very first Comedy Club there was the hungry eye in San Francisco that the first night has the 60s though that was a 60s cuz the ice house is the oldest running

comedy club in the world the ice house is the oldest all the other old ones are gone except the ice house and The Comedy and Magic Club is right on his heels that's that's probably second but what was the bridge called, and I think there was a gas light was a comedy club though I don't think they've the way they did it which was great and again I don't want to give give too much of it away but the way they did it where it's like people getting bumped like she got bumped yeah I don't think that that was what guys did with a run around doing 15 minutes ago from one cup to another the way into your Comics do it now I don't think that's real but that's a nitpicky thing that's it's more you know it's more addictive I think of how people do it today you like you think they would let me know who the fuck now so maybe they're drop-in back then maybe they did have nights like several nights were they had just comedy kliph nesteroff about the history of Comedy

no he's crying I don't know but it's Cliff n e s t e r o v and I had to buy my podcast a couple times he's great but the real First comedy shows in New York where the comedian's drunks the Scoundrels in the history of American Comedy did you find anything about the oldest or the first stand-up comedy club arguably it what's in the United Kingdom 1979 was The Comedy Store in before that they were just perform okay English motherfuker got a hold of Wikipedia and ruined everything in the United States history goes back into the 19th century in Vaudeville places and so it just depends on when somebody first turn their been you and I do what I'm saying is who called who was who had the very first, the club hungry I San Francisco to the hungry I was a 100% comedy club in The Bitter End which was music and comedy interested in New York

so those are the ones in what year is that he's into the sexiest doesn't have Mort saw

I think more it's all still around Google that I think he is but you still doing stand-up I think the dick Gregory's around Gregory died is that true find out that first cuz I'm a dick if I say died you didn't ya Dick Gregory funeral

yeah. But I think Lenny Bruce might have started the Hungry Eyes well I think he's starting to San Francisco I think you're right

yeah that was the beatniks right yeah let into the Z still around God damn you more it's all still Rock in 1991 years old mother fucker modem all good for him yeah all these guys were The Originators without them this is this is the original roots of the tree of stand-up comedy hundred percent right

we do now Jamie Google shut I just believe it's a crazy history you really stop and think about the the year it starts in the 60s and that before that it didn't exist like that like it was kind of a thing that people did there was Court Jesters there was funny people who was comedy in various plays musicals the comedic elements MCS people with MC things but in terms of like someone going specifically to see someone say things in a funny way I just talked to you in front of a microphone that's it is really recent hits

no magic we were born a hundred years ago what the fuck do we do

well we might we might have done Vaudeville

hang out with all those Vaudeville people are evil people where you go from town to town your beer your suitcase has no wheels on it and lugging that shit on a train or the Young by Fun because if you think you're a big deal when you go to a town now go to fucking Columbus Ohio and 19 19 and and perform you would be like a god to them

W Los to be like a Carne traveling from town to town probably fucking real Lucid your morals

spreading god-knows-what around the Midwest all kinds of STD's and yeah I owe you's and me's team 10 fried and they're also like they're living a Savage Life might expect them to find a nice guy on Kansas and settle down that's right there working the Tilt-A-Whirl and they're they're going to prop it up with logs to the left side does never a leg that they spend so you got to keep an eye on it you want to launch anybody to the parking lot if you do you just pack up and move to the next town they just get this a lawyer's just no way to track on the internet yeah they say you know a lot of those early they was very Jewish because Jews were having a hard time getting hired and so that was one of the few places they could work and that's why they say comedy was a very Jewish thing interest leading into the borscht belt and all that Stan and Ollie just came out it's basically about this

Lauren Harley Harley Vaudeville touring comedians in 1920s when did this come out just came out in the theaters right now Holly stand for forget the Laurel and Hardy right yeah

I don't know Steve Coogan is who Steve Coogan I said British stand-up I think

but that's cool I'm glad someone okay I'll have seen that guy before

I'm glad someone's doing that

Charlie Chapman was supposedly a bad motherfuker he would go up to the Hearst castle and fuck a hearse wife in the castle castle when I was a little kid amazing and a chaplain would go up he was fucking everybody everybody's wife yeah he got off on wives really yeah.

imagine the only happy if you're banging someone else's woman wow that's crazy guess it's no just no commitment the baby that it and the baby are at the Hearst Castle

that's him with the cigarette yeah that's so weird 1930s banging her every weekend of people and they would have hunt stay with fucking hunt during the day or if you know they play tennis and then everybody would meet for high balls at like five in one room and giant fireplaces and then set dinner is it fucking servants and if you got an invite to that he went for you go for like 3 weeks what it looks like it looks like the haunted dining hall in the Disney ride the Haunted Mansion real pasta ever seen that talk about so look at that image right now and now Google the dining room at the Haunted Mansion Disneyland you fly by and you're you're on the little train and you pass by On The Go store dance

looks just like that and then it was as if all the grounds were a zoo at Hearst Castle it was fucking giraffes running around zebras like El Chapo he couldn't get rid of his money he had so much fucking money that's the shitt image of it then I'll be good image of it

how's that possible to take pictures in the area that's a good point yeah why you take pictures of your kids

anyway it looks real similar to that but yeah that guy had way too much money he brought over wild boars he's the reason why California has a wild pig problem no shit yes that fuck goddamn wild boars that didn't they go hunting he brought them here it's not down here she's not in Southern California throw up there their they're slowly making their way down here but the ones that are down here the closest they are is Tejon Ranch Tejon Ranch is about an hour and a half from here and they have wild pigs is it that hard to just get a bunch of guys with AK-47 and hunt them down it's not that hard but you can't do that in California California you can get depredation permits and they have gotten depredation permit suneet the hunting at night with night vision because sometimes the pigs will start making their way into agriculture or they start making their way into the like they'll lay down some fresh sod and put some grass down his pigs will destroy

thousands of dollars in landscaping damage when they prove that that's happening then they get a special permit and then they could just start walking and then they just take out like everything at night and they do you know sniper rifles and shit but then when a normal person wants to like say if you wanted to kill a wild pig you can get as many licenses as you like you can get five licenses sing at 6 or so you can shoot six pigs in a day it's totally legal as long as you pay for each individual tag because the the understanding is that it at least in most places California the only place to treat it like game and most places you don't even have to have tags for them most place there encouraging you to shoot them and that'll probably be the case in California eventually like it isn't like Texas friends friends friend Texas is a real pig problem the day of a giant there's millions and millions and millions of pigs in Houston

you said that what you really had me believing they didn't believe it and you setting up the joke the whole time it's nice species they would ask us to please not feed the marshmallow cuz I lived in Gainesville right by this place called Lake Alice yeah it was goddamn dinosaur but there was a small population of them if they've been whacked into Oblivion before people make it suitcases out of them and then they made it illegal to hunt them and they made him a protected species then it's fucked up they overprotected those goddamn super lizards are everywhere and I have a fucking everywhere my mom belongs to a golf course down in Florida where she lives

and there's is alligator's apparently like this fucking 14 foot alligator and the people playing golf and it was a deer and everybody's on the Everest and they're going to like it here

beautiful ear fucking alligator comes out and grabs it pulls it into the water does that spin move takes it to the bottom fucking done so and was talking about it what do we do about it so about three weeks later my mom is out on the course and her ball is right next to the lake where the alligator is and she forgets and she goes over and her ball is right on the edge and she's standing there and she was standing on some fucking like dead some dead grass and it gave out and she fell in the fucking Lake up to her neck and then she remembered and she fucken started scrambling up the mud and grabbing at the Reeds to get out of there and enter and the people that she was with that left she was playing by herself for some reason

and she fucken got out of there and got the card and and then she just started laughing oh my God

what about a tasty meal way more tender corn-fed

my mom's corn-fed I never told you that I choose organic we let her free range that sometimes

there's a great story about a car chase cops are chasing his do with stolen car and guy jumps off a bridge into the water in a media gets eaten by alligators he's like a little over Passover River just hops out of the fucking car jumps into the river and smash he lands right in front of an alligator wow

what are you do have your cop do you shoot at the alligator to try to kill the alligator was killing a guy could Point me that's a reckless thing to be doing when there's a lot of thrashing around you just going to empty your clip you know I mean how much distance is there between the bridge and that the water would write what can a cop do what you know the guys going to die so I think it's I think it's a safe bet to take some shots anyway I think it's a not safe but to take some shots because of your cop would have hit the guy and they said oh you shot me trying to cover up by alligators eat them it's true there's a guy flying a plane from Florida to Cuba or or Cuba to Florida and the plane fucking went down and he survived the crash and then got eaten by sharks really why is the funny so fucked up. Where you're floating in the water

but you're thankful and you're almost giddy I did it I fucking survived bad day story about the world war that sank in the guys are floating ROTC for several days and most of them get eaten by sharks that's the story that they talked about in the beginning of Jaws number with the captain the captain's if the fucking scars and he starts talking about his eyes time on the boat do you remember that scene cider donut Roy Scheider the guy was talking to Roy Scheider okay who's that guy what's that guy's name again old-time acted like I was fucking amazing

spell jaws Richard Dreyfuss was a scientist Roy Scheider was the Sheriff Richard Dreyfuss was the scientist and then there's an older gentleman. Oh yeah right steals up fucking monkey he steals up movie where is he still have fucking movie he steals I fucking movie you believe him wait till I was the opening scene not the opening scene but he describes what it was like no that's a different shark attack all the naval ship yeah that's it that's it I'm sorry I was thinking went to the worst shark attack in history of thinking it was that story about New Jersey with a bull sharks kill people scroll back up so I can see what it says there

1945 u.s. naval ship was sunk by Japanese submarine the ship sinking was just the beginning of the sailors nightmare yeah that's the boat that's the story how many people died let's see 200 the most 300 people died of the 1196 been aboard 900 made it into the water live there are deal so that's that's how many survived the crash so there's nine hundred of them alive now how many of them make it to the end

out of 900 scroll scroll scroll scroll up there just giving you the full line of the actual facts 317 remained so

so almost 600 people got to eat estimates of the number who died from shark attacks range from a few dozen to almost a hundred and fifty so the other people die from other things starvation probably stroking in the water could be long and so I bet when those guys died in the Sharks eight down and it got even worse fuck man that's fucking crazy just imagine a hundred and fifty people eaten by sharks

the amount of blood in the water fucking Christ

do you know when you're around any kind of thing that can eat you and kill you it puts it all into perspective that you're not you're not around that enough it's not it's not like you should be around at all the time but you should know it's a real thing and when you're around it you like oh oh sharks just will just eat you owe a bear will just eat you oh I'm out loud just eat you like these people that got killed this year was 2018 at least was very rare and that two people were documented killed by mountain lions in the Pacific Northwest one guy in Portland outside of Portland one guy outside of Seattle pretty rare the mountain lions do that but oh not lying so just eat you oh that can happen till we think we're so safe and I think it I think you're right it would keep you in the moment I think we should release like grizzly in cities just because like you might be worried about all my the fucking stock market's down or think my wife is cheating

right back in the in the moment but then you have to allow people to be armed themselves guys going to have open carry fucking AR sling around their shoulders looking out for bears everywhere take me to get to school you better bring a rifle is only two blocks away bro bring the rifle shot beer here a couple days ago pound wild dog like thing and that's not that's not one shot that's going to be a pretty good gun to take that thing they're not going to tell you that would look up 9mmm you anywhere

you have to you have to have a perfect shot right in the perfect part of its brain to shut it off quick to prevent you from getting mauled

the amount of strength that they have to you'd be like a water balloon be like tearing open a bag of zip lock bag full of Jell-O apart that fucking bear attack was insane with a bear attacks nothing compared to what really happens if he really got bit by bear bike that like you probably be destroyed like I think the guy that was the that we're really happened to in real life it's kind of Base really Loosely on a story I think you got kind of like a little mold and that was enough a little mold leave you like that that there was throwing him around for like that bear would have killed you have no bones left who snapped everything into it a fine powder just Crush you and eat you right special want to start stinking like to bury things let him rot for a while

to do my friend Adam and shot a moose in Canada and bears claimed it and he went back in his video of it it's so spooky. Seuss is buried it's a giant big ass moose by the time they got you know they shoot it and then it goes it runs away and then you have to track if it let it let it die takes a little while so you the smart thing to do is to sit out for a couple hours it'll be dead for sure but what you don't want to do is Spook it while it's injured if it's not a perfect hit if it runs away cuz then it's going to just keep running around for a long time on the drenalin so that they were the correct movies if you don't see an animal die you don't see if you see it run of the woods you wait

and you wait just as a precautionary mother well damn well died in seconds and a bear claimed it immediately who died probably right in front of them what state was this this is an Alaska so the bear it is there the most dies right in front of him was like I'll look at that that's mine

I start eating it and I started covering it up so eat some of it, is it up they come tracking an hour later so it's already covered in dirt oh no that's how I don't know myself they might have taken some of the meat and we're going back to pack it out cuz sometimes when you hunt your heart with one person but when you go back to pack out a big animal you bring like five or six and I help you but this is the video of it but give me some volume

homeless is buried

yeah I don't like this

so everything is like you know five and a half feet high grass or noac I mean how tall is that grass for 4 and 1/2 feet at least so Bears could be in that shit they could be hunkered down in that chair so I'm seeing the skull on the ground and the skull skin down so what that means to me is that he had already started butchering to the Moose and probably went back to it so that's I was kind of correct that when I was right about that or not but this is what happened they can only take some of the meat cuz they were terrified the Bears going to come back and I don't think they had a gun on them

I need her to scan in the area see how the does the moots the head is already off of the antler and so this is the next video

the scary ship man slated even see the bear they just noticed the bear

think about the strength to take Frozen earth like that and dig it out

what's the type of bear you know if you run into a black bear you're more likely to be thought of as food kind of interesting like you're more likely predation on humans is more common with black bears they decide to try to eat you but with Grizzlies

Grizzlies r r it's rare that a Grizzly decides to eat you decide to chase you down eat you it's more common that you fuck up and run into a female or use try to steal his food like that like to get the fuck out because if he decided to run at them they got a real giant problem most of time of beer won't though they're cautious till State they'll hang back cuz they figure what do you do you going to eat that whole moose going to leave me some I ate a bunch going to wait a little while see what the fuck you're doing is probably full anyway but they had to get out of there then we took a little bit of the meat and they took off like it's too dangerous

used to be everywhere is to be ever in California that's why it's on our flag we killed them all. We you and I were in Boston but they killed all the grizzly bears in California but still under state flag the state flag has a fucking grizzly bear California doesn't have any Grizzlies they were like raccoons they were behind restaurants going through dumpsters around brown bears are black bears are smart and know where the garbage is turning right there's a place called Levesque the vet California is off the 5 and its name that way for the last guy to die in a bear attack in California until I get enough be fucking nuff family they want a big in the sky up afterwards find out the story's true and he was just in pieces

shit so Coastal bear to bear attack shark attack or dying a cryogenic tank

Diana Krall would be way less painful you just freeze that's the way to go I don't know if that's the way to go though because then you're not going to get eaten but shouldn't you return to Nature ya mean you really should be eating and I'd rather be eaten by one of my kind which is ground animal those fucking cunt in the water I can't even by those heartless assholes don't even take care of their babies yeah you know a bear at least takes care of their young in there with their heads they eat their babies to and especially males males killed babies left and right they'd actually actively go after them and kill them but so does sharks sharks sharks have if they eat each other inside the womb out no share an MRI of sharks in the womb

the monster movie that's insane the real

those images that's a good question I've seen those images that I feel like I think it's real I think the reason why I thought it was fake and then it was one of those really want to find out was fake or thought it was fake. It's real but the images if it's real It's fucking amazing she's little monsters inside a inside a womb and then you got to think you know I guess no one could you just lay the eggs out in the Minges jizz on the eggs they don't fuk terrible life the women lay the eggs on the floor good salmon that's what happens what happens with trout the lay the eggs out in the man come by and shoot loads all over them

I'm going to things pop up and no one takes care of anybody all those kids this girl without parents parents don't give a fuk about then apparently them happens all the time with little fish big fish is hungry this eat that they don't even know if they're spark at the meeting and I'm hungry they just they have a system of maintaining a population when there's not enough food and some of you guys got to go through this and Finding Nemo is there wasn't in there a fucking left it out didn't even eat all those bear movies the movies about bears from Disney to don't eat Terrance Bambi apart eating her face while back legs are kicking the Bears hold them down and eat them like a grape that ass it's very inconvenient to show that in The Lion King to show how the light where's our food and everything is a battle we're going to war with p

will try to rain today in the Kingdom where's the snack where's all the food you do a feature lady length animated movie where you show how it really works, God killing people

yeah cats cats are the population control of the world those motherfukers faster than everybody can only meet and all they do is just run around and try to catch people slipping try to catch animals slipping come on come on you just ate and how to get grubs or something like that and that's what kind of propaganda horseshit is this that got that's an thaimerican that doesn't a stampede of like willdabeast what she probably was attack of it I just don't remember them showing that in that movie at all that's how they really see the problem is kids grow up and they see this stuff and the soft-headed amongst them well then think that animals are really like that so the venture out into the forest try to make friends just have to be open spiritually just go to the Lions Den open

spiritually and let the forest know

I talked to a lady wants you to yoga lady and she was talking about Colorado and she's like when I walk into the woods I just walk out there and say I'm walking out here with love please do not harm me like yeah that's not going to work unless you're having your. Get back in the car and morality thing it's not a good or bad thing it's like something's going to get eaten if you're out there and you're the slow mo thing you're going to get eaten no offense but no one's mad at you just Darwinism this is not a Discerning organism it's got moral value that it places on you know attacking thugs only or are not going after yoga instructors slow shift that I can eat no language they just lose an organism looking to survive complex set of reinforcements and and reward systems that are set up for it to be an incredibly efficient predator

male lions the size of that fucking head just a big as Jaws powerful what you were saying could not find a video and I do believe when we found that before it was fake I'm trying to find a Google even like fake the sharks in the body just Google MRI image found something that I kind of contradicts it though this is a dead shark that they perform a C-section on and there is 98 live pups inside one that's true but that doesn't mean that it happens every time I think what I had read was that it happens often this is the only thing I can find of a shark pregnancy easy on him in the water he's pulling them out and saving them that is nuts man look at all those little monsters just swarming around Chino they fuck that's crazy Millions literally millions

sharks are hunted and killed every year that's crazy offer the soup that Charlotte's Lee yeah that's change people's attitudes on shark fishing cuz people used to catch shark and used to get it at restaurants all the time I remember you remember on the East Coast you get mako shark so he's a fucking player how many sharks are Finn's Research indicates that about a hundred million sharks are killed each year

wow Rock the 11,000 sharks an hour that is incredible this is by finding that's incredible

it's likely that many sharks are caught without being reported also the okay so this is just weather reporting my God

that people wreck this is like the first time I can remember in history that people are concerned with people fishing for sharks because we talked about this was the governor of New York who was it who was the cat that got in trouble for

legally catching a shark and cookie at needing it I want to see what the governor and governor of New York but, maybe the government son what are the fuck is Gmail find it yourself so this was all normal when we were kids was normal spot like that might as well be a Marlin or halibut just you got a cool what's it taste like God's good good you cook with lemon like swordfish for someone or something so that some you make au particularly delicious really does taste a lot like swordfish but In Our Lifetime it's now become taboo because people have this rough idea of what a shark is in the Sharks being targeted sharks being murdered and to the small amount of sharks left I don't know if that's accurate cuz I think that this is just in one part of the world they're killing off all these sharks it's like if you say that

no more grizzly bears left well if you talk about California you're right but if you're talking about British Columbia you're wrong there is a fuckload of them up there and they're scary that are big they're big and they're fast and they need to eat every day and they berries if they'd find berries they'll eat some berries or they eat your ass hole to

resent would you would you say this is it's happening I forget what they called bear Island and I rented this guy had a had a 1948 think it's called us Stenson there's some kind of plane prop plane and I paid him a hundred bucks to take me over bear Island in this fucking shity little plane and we went out there and it took him like 30 minutes to get the plane started when I was like I should get the fuck out of here so we go up and and the thing is getting tossed around by wind and and we go out and we go over bear Island he's shown me fucking Bear all over the exact the highest concentration of Bear in the anywhere in Alaska

Jesus Christ those bears giant to man the coastal Bears they're all eating Seafood. Like fish and salmon and they just get enormous they're so big there's so much bigger than bears that are in land like hundreds of pounds what are the Inland bears eat a hold of Sam if they find salmon if there's a Salmon River the fish that buries Elite Cavs eat a lot of cabs did a lot of caps of elk and moose and deer fawns eat small things you can't get away they did everything they can now they're so big ass assistant that you imagine how much food you would have to eat if you weighed 800 pounds how much food would you have to eat every day for free that fucking creepy

look at I fucking a long nailed creep that's a monster man would but we think it's Yogi oh it's so cute he will eat your kid in front of you and that's what they have to do that mean they're their predators they're out there their they're omnivores mean they do occasionally eat whatever the fuck they want the roots and berries delete everything else too but they'll definitely you and love it yeah have a good old time

get at Saint of the perfect food for them it's all fat you store it up it's almost like it's designed for them to because the salmon die they literally died on the river I can catch him know that every year when they have to go back up to where they're born right they say that once the salmon make the track from the ocean to the freshwater they're already on a path to dye their clock is already gone over it's already flipped over into no return land you couldn't take him out of there and bring them to like some salmon Pawn they live forever doesn't work that way they are they they breed they make the track they breed and when they get to the spot where you know when they're where they're in their life they are their body start changing color they start getting mushy that deliver rotten and they just fucking wind up like pulling up on the ground and then the Bears move in and they eat hundreds of rotten ones to this is this is why

salmon are in the run and these bears are there fighting over territory these motherfuckers Jesus Christ dude they're fighting over who gets to Salmon but these are salmon they're still pretty fresh and healthy if they're swimming around they look good and so they catch them up as a perfectly healthy salmon and he catches it right in the middle of it or tried who's all slow mo and shit. Goes to try and they catch some of them

what is a look at that imagine just standing in freezing cold water or waiting to catch something with your mouth that's delicious right we'll figure it out and it works yep look at the Cubs will come on Mom to fuck so Mom probably going to give him some of that he should brakes off pieces of it until they just keep doing that back and forth and they'll do that all day but then once the salmon are done with their run then they just died and coincidentally when they're dying is probably right when the Bears are trying to fatten up and get ready for hibernation sort of happens together and they're all in the right place at the right time see if you can find bears eating rotten salmon cuz I sometimes they'll pull up in these these rivers in these like little ponds shed and you just see this all these Bears is chew on his rotting carcasses

you have a salmon or endangered owl we eat so much more fish than once every 3 weeks now I mean maybe it's cuz we're in LA but I have fished a few times a week do you have some fucking Sushi one day wife will cook some salmon another day could be one of those poke bowls

constantly eating salmon to lot of food think about all those little organisms that have to fuck will not really shoot loads on eggs make new organisms and then all the people with Nets stupid amount to see a tuna got sold in Japan the highest amount ever $3000000 Fortuna

I've no idea Germany idea for the tuna could be three million dollars and the VIN Japan and whoever is like certain chefs have more cash and they're able to come in first and picked up the tuna but then they but then they auction them off any other go for crazy money that's so crazy that's a giant fucking fish though it's like six hundred pounds or something how much it cost $278 with that in English

yeah look at that thing God damn that's a hard that is to bring in yeah I caught a yellowtail in Hawaii that was like 11 lb is 613 lb

can we kind of quite a few of them know it's interesting they're catching ones that they're calling Hamachi cuz they were actually from a Hamachi farm that was on the big island that broke during the storm and when that storm there a couple years back giant fucking hurricanes in Hawaii will it destroyed this this containment area that they had with her Farm raising Hamachi feel like sushi and shit so now this type of yellowtails everywhere in the in the ocean so you caught it there you brought it back to the hotel and then they Friday of every looking for you yeah yeah it's amazing so good they make sushi for us they made they made Sashimi they made Ceviche that go with baked it they cooked it a couple of different ways but you know they're so powerful a 10lb 190 lb 1 or so powerful can't believe

so imagine that thing's 600-lb holy shit at we put a video up of the dolphin that were with us I saw that I was amazing incredible they just all part we just hit the right spot and they all decided to swim with the boat they just get in the in front of the boat of the both pushed in the water with it that's amazing so crazy you worried about you going to hit them you worried that they're going to be the people run in the boat they don't worry about it all the dolphins know exactly what they're doing their smart Ash it it's weird it's weird to watch them all coordinated together and then they were done like by TI my daughter serfs and they come out they play around a little bit sometimes they ride the waves when she surfing. One of the dark sides of fishing right pump commercial fishing is what happens

ban they take those dolphins and they look at them as competition you know they've been doing that forever the large-scale slaughter of them did you shoot him to cut them to bring of your Cena documentary The Cove I heard about that awful awful it's like they're slaughtering water people that's what it's like what a dolphin is is some strange super intelligent creature that we don't totally understand and I can talk they can talk to each other and we don't know what they're saying but they know what they're saying and we could train them you could ride them you can the eclipse for fish all this kind of stuff that's all true that's all true but what's also true is damn a giant brain have a huge brain cerebral cortex is 40% larger than a person no shit wow designed for

how does the movement of his body cuz it's a lot lot lot larger body but they think it's also got some sort of probably not totally understood our measure cognitive ability to don't know what how smart they really are you know we were talking about Timothy Leary he's around with John Lilly John Lily's a guy who invented the isolation tank and he's also he was a Pioneer in inter-species communication you give Dolphins acid and he would set the float tank up next to the dolphin tank and take acid and get in there with them yeah he's yeah he was trying to figure out a way to get Dolphins to speak he would get them to like make a noise that sounds like Halal you know but they could they don't have the vocal cords they did can't make the sounds that we expect yeah but they're sounds we don't understand which is weird cuz they know what you're saying if you say okay we're going to jump now we got a job going to give you a fish they know what they know what you're saying we have no idea what they're saying

yeah it's weird when he would what is the cutoff for killing an intelligent animal and I like you can't kill dogs cats

dogs are nearly as smart as Dolphins nice but you can kill dogs in some spots cultural yeah cuz pigs are probably as smart as dogs dogs are really smart and that's a

that's a tricky one always you know

that is one of our criteria like even a lot of vegetarians will still step on roaches are criteria is how smart is the thing how close is it to us the further it's away from us the easy we could get like no because a fuck about oysters you know. I don't care I don't care at all no thang chuc sinh Neu CERN opens up Scoops down and swallow them like I was a good that's real smart say so scared so terrified. Can you do that I can't do that oh yeah I can do it freaks me out around the live and then you throw them in and they scream there bugs get ice cream they sing first

sound like a frog in Carnegie All Eyez the lobsters yeah but they taste like in Boston at the the Copley Marriott that was my day job for a while in college and then when I first started doing stand-up and we used to go down and it was the biggest Banquet Hall in Boston so we see all these conventions all these fucking hayseed Farmers would come from the Midwest and it stay in the hotel and they could order any kind of dinner they wanted for their banquet but they always wanted a pilgrim to Pilgrim banquet and we used to have to fucking dress up as pilgrims and we would serve lobster it didn't make any sense so they would make and the thing about banquet cooking is you cook 10% more than the amount of people you're feeding just in case which meant there was like you know 3030 college kids all waiting tables and and so after we

a damn they would usually have like a presentation or whatever comedian or speaker so we would leave the room for like an hour and a half and we would just fucking go to town on like a hundred lobsters be like three lobsters if you wanted one of my friends were all working the bars are all the bartenders so we can be doing shots drinking beer and so is the upside was you live like a king the downside was you were dressed like a fucking asshole

remember clambakes people do on the beach Clambake where you would bury it and be out seaweed over-the-top and shit wet seaweed and it would just steam everything I've never done it I've only eaten it at a restaurant when you order a clambake and they give you some I've never done the beach thing I did it with Kevin Murphy right fucking corn in there everything potatoes to something about a bonfire on the beach right it's like extra special here it is that's it right there how to make a steam pit

make a nice fucking steam pet look at that we got a lobster's we got caught on, we got clams yeah that would be lobsters and corn and clams and then yeah potatoes and it would all be buried in like a burlap sack under the ground muscles to God damn it I don't like lobster I just do not understand that you don't have like a lobster Eddie Bravo morning fish heads fish you son of a bitch a little bit look at that with the little with the green stuff what is that minced onions or something what is that like crawl crawl I think what's know what's the stuff on the that's not that is a Spiced Right

cuz it's on the corn to know yeah I think that's like a what is that like a salary or something like that parsley chopped parsley or some shit just like I like it you eat around everything now shit I chew the inner cartilage up

I suck the meat out of it

I feel like is that thing is going to die I'm going to eat as much of it as I can bite into the you know how you take the back and is that meat underneath with all the crazy gills and all that shit I was chewing that stuff I had chewed up chewed up good junk all that shit and butter that's what I'm talking about

let's remove on one of those waitresses I'm dressed as a pilgrim I'm drunk. Some girl from Boston College did you know there lobsters really poor people food in New York they would just go out to the East River and pull them out of the water serving best bar food for people food during the famine they were pulling fucking Lobster out of the ocean would need it they considered it like rats they said they fucking need the British will just ship it off then so crazy I did not figure it out there drunk one person just boil it up made somebody we need as much as I've been thinking what the fuck is Evan doing like the whole family is starving Scott Damn Delicious woman eating potatoes

dudes almost for forever yeah I know some dates please do ladies and gentlemen live comedy comedy I know be in Cleveland one of my favorite clubs hilarities love that place January 17th or 19 that's a great spot play I love that play on boss and I'll be in Boston Jen laugh Boston January 31st in Cleveland you were in Cleveland I did it with you that's right you stop by and did it just surprise guest spot that was fun fun Grand Rapids Michigan in February and then a bunch of the dates, that best buddies I'm doing a benefit January 27th at The Comedy Store you around Bill Burr is going to be on the show you did it last year it's been sitting a fruit that helps intellectually disabled people 27th is a Sunday night

can come see it and then I've also got a new podcast with Alison Rosen called childish where we talked about raising kids together isn't she great I bet her on and I did her when she was on Adam Carolla did the show with her them together I like her alot couple times with her now like I like her a lot just realized like she was my best chemistry so we just started a podcast yeah she's she's kind she's super-smart she's cool she had reasonable she likes thinks about you can tell she's thinking about things right yeah that's awesome man I'm glad you doing that and what is it called again childish she's got a baby and another one on the way and it's kind of me trying to teach her how to parent and she's not buying it

how many do we still want to wake I think we've done like 7 so far nice and you still do your own right how many hours are burnt down Greg fits what does it fit star radio.com Greg Fitzsimmons on Instagram breakfast show on Twitter nice by love you

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Flashlight Friends much love I got a lot of shit happening Mike Tyson's going to be on soon the great powerful Theo Von

going to be here soon I got a lot of fucking people coming in Adam Greentree my my good friend from Australia he'll be here soon

a lot of podcast folks we're eventually going to that Kanye podcast to his busy man I want to talk with him too much I'm going back and forth with Sylvester motherfuker

that's right Sylvester Stallone

can make that happen I got some scientist coming some really interesting people

that's it that's it for now love to you all thank you thanks for your support thanks for enjoying the show I appreciate you and I think about you when I'm doing it I want to make sure I don't fuck this up all right love to all Buy

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