#1150 - Felipe Esparza

The Joe Rogan Experience #1150 - Felipe Esparza

July 31, 2018

Felipe Esparza is an actor and stand up comedian, who won Last Comic Standing in 2010. Check out his podcast called "What's Up Fool?" available on iTunes & SoundCloud: https://felipesworld.com/podcast/

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hey ladies and gentlemen how the fuck is everybody I'm on the road for this is the last big push to the end of September then after that I'm taking a break imma do some clubs for a while get my new shit together but the ones that I have available right now or August 10th August 10th I'm going to be in Kansas City

► 00:00:23

at the Starlight Amphitheater oshit August 11th the next day sold out that's in St Louis the next shift that's available is the 15th of September no 14th of September in Columbus

► 00:00:41

the Schottenstein say right no Schottenstein Schottenstein Center that is September 14th and is just a few tickets that are available still for Toronto the end of September 29th and that's it then no torrent for a while I'll see how long it takes me to come up with some new shit JoeRogan.Com for all those tickets this episode of podcast is brought you by the cash app if you've heard me talk about this before you know what the cash app is it's a free app that you can get for the Google Play store or the iTunes Store and it's a very convenient it's basically like an ATM debit card app that's what it's like plus a whole bunch of other shit one of things that lets you do is pay people back so if you owe people money paying back with the cash app they can actually spend it and they can also buy and sell Bitcoin

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I guess today is the Great and Powerful Felipe Esparza is a hilarious stand-up comedian who won Last Comic Standing all around great dude hang out with them all the time at The Comedy Store and everywhere else I see him on the road it's a long time coming I'm glad I got him in here I love this do it so please give it up for Felipe Esparza

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The Joe Rogan Experience

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Yeehaw could be paying how are you sir what's up fool good man you have to have any say that I don't know it seems like you said what's up dude and then you said what's up. I guess I'm slipping is that like we have such a cool saying like you do you almost feel compelled to use it yeah it all started like answer the phone like that I was dating this girl Nicole her up at her brother answer the phone what's up Foo West Coast hoodie West Central

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but I mostly like a west coast south central East LA Boyle Heights Boyle Heights in the house young people when it comes to like Mexicans and Americans with this whole wall thing yeah I want to go to look at the walls cuz I went to Mexico and I was like at the right at the border of the gate like the gate is not a wall that is a gate and a crust for the gate they have like 8 wall prototypes

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like the ones that like 8 wall prototype that there's one wall that's like a it's a walrus a man and it has concrete then it's another wallet different and then another was like damn you doing it when you go buy tile for your house yeah and they show you all the tiles wow Home Depot placard with different wow look at that that's it I was ready I was there I was right in front of that each one of those I think it cost 25 million each wall what someone's getting robbed

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I could do that for 30 grand

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anytime you have a war historically shit goes down right people want to get over that wall it's natural when I get out of it if you want to get out but want to get in

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here's what the crazy shit about the wall I'm sure you seen where it goes into the ocean yeah I was there like how you going to stop people from going around that that is the silliest thing ever that is like having this gigantic impenetrable boundary but on one side does just like a door yeah that's a door you go right around that may be hard to bring all your shit so what happened did these guys right there on the Mexico side those guys over there on the California side like that is the weirdest shit ever to play volleyball with each other yeah all right there so that wall that's an old wall see that's the construction of the wall that I saw it now

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yeah wow man I swear but as soon as you swear another pay the Kohl's card to come get you that is so crazy just what it what if you don't want to walk relax and said any of that not saying that they just look at this just as I use your brain just look at this objectively and see how bizarre it is that there's a gigantic physical boundary to keep certain people from going into a certain area

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I mean I I think that that one day that has to not be a thing anymore right when you say

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that is a crazy thing to justify like you can't come to the good spots like the good spots are limited to be no more no more good spot that's the that's the fear

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and here's the thing that ain't none count that's not a something perfect it's not it's not totally illogical either right like you would be worried if you lived in a sweet place like a name a city. Too many people perfect size

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Boulder Colorado what if a million more people moved in the boulder

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not all sudden it's a million 100,000 you like what the fuck what the fuck is this you can't go anywhere now everybody's rude people start getting antsy that the way they tried to drive faster that's what happens me more more gags

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how do you fix that that's what that's what we need to fix not like whether or not there's a wall how do you fix people from getting crazy I know man they have a subway system to keep get other people off the streets yeah yeah

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if they did yeah if they did have like a couple million people move their like damn start moving shit and setting so it's you would change radically that's what happens to places he had too many people they just fucking change

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it's up it's still strange foxy a wall

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it is Mantua New your house I'm not saying that I guess but it gets so good so right when you left me about this what did you think the comedy thing is it's weird it's fucking weird

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it seems to be something that should be perhaps reexamined so ideal

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text Thomas I we have weird parents that we have to listen to for a whole life that those parents are the government I know when I was little boy I was living in Mexico and my mother she's a tie me up to a stump out of someone runaway holy shit to follow my dad to work every day but that was like I think he was like a steel worker or something he work Tom and I leave so you work with metal all the time and I will follow him to it to work everyday cuz I was bored little kid I guess and they can I run away everyday I'm on my way to tie me up to a little stressed out with a rope other pet basically Jesus Christ

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holy shit

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that's a weird memory Idaho right I remember I lived in Mexico for a little while so I was 3 or 4 then my dad took off to remember Max, I remember a bathroom with outside

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like an outhouse have to use a flashlight to go outside and now I remember mosquito's everywhere and my mom's family all living in like in one big ranch with different houses and it was fucking Dusty I mean it was Dusty old living in Sinaloa Mexico and needs to be a truck that would water though the ground every day because it was too Dusty I don't know cement but then my dad took us to United States and we followed him

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we came we would we live we were living in Tijuana Mexico for about 2 years to remember how you got through yeah we go out with all my dad made it through first start up another family then came and got us know but that's what I thought it was and she lived right next to that where that where the gate is Polonia Trail say what's up and we went across with a Smuggler

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I'm on Peter money and we got in his car we crossed we made it through every move he made it through but there was like a checkpoint back in the day in San Clemente California the California Sheriff's Department was just the County Fair Oaks randomly stopped cars you know like too many people in one car and it's hard to have me so they got us that lead to put it in there like in a holding cell my mom went one way we went the other way and I was probably 4 maybe or five of them number 30303 little brothers I have my little brother was like 3 in the other one or two why would they separate you from your mom I don't know that I guess that's how they process wetbacks or illegal people that seems kind of crazy she went to one when I don't know what I remember crying or being scared I just know that we watching cartoons you know

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wow American cartoons that's how you remember and then they caught us we went we went back again and they cut it again in another car and we got separated again but this time we were held for a longer time and where my aunt when she saw a Mexico she said haha but the third time was like my dad and my mom came over this crazy idea because we have brothers who had two cousins in San Ysidro California and my mom said you know what are we just borrow their passports you know to cross

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that in that well I don't remember this you know I just found out recently that what happened my brother told me

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my little young brother we just about like a little girl

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Lego full on little girl because I thought that we had like three passports and you were boys one was girl and we took straws the gas and my mom and my and they forced my little brother to be a little girl how do you make him look like a girl they just a little girl for two weeks just to play around you know it to get my fake name and so and so he was playing you no dancing no I know you know dancing getting ready playing with Lego Barbie dolls and so he was preparing preparing the narrow bro wow

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how old was he he was to at least two or three million

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Chloe we cry and we made it all the way and I remember that

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some other car pictures are we going to be jumping another car right away

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and then we jumped in another car

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and then that car drove us to count to of Southern California weather like in Compton somewhere and Carson where in the house they had it was funny when I call for illegal immigrants like everybody or they were going different places okay who are you going to go to St Louis this guy you going to go to San Diego this lady her three kids are going to go to Boyle Heights because I was a father so then we ended up going to Boyle Heights and I didn't speak no English at all

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but I picked up English by the way you know cuz your little like what you buy on a woman and she said Six Million Dollar Man credible Hulk to say Hazard so you basically picked it up from TV yeah

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like what kind of what kind of like lessons did you take lessons in English 0 it was different from now there was no like separating these kids who don't speak Spanish and put them in the English as a second language class I started kindergarten so

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so you just picked it up I picked it up the picture crazy to never spoke Spanish to us she never said okay you know what apple is that it wasn't nothing like that it was it was you going to pick it up or not because you were you were so young your brain could pick up another language really quickly is not what they say like young people their brains pick up languages quicker

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do you have a picture up really fast but you're my pronunciation will not there but I didn't know how to say bye I like I was hit by a lion that kind of makes sense right that a part of your brain would really developed and make it real easy to learn a language when it's really young and I like okay how do I say this what do I do you like give more of a desperation for figuring it out but I bet you a little kid that comes from another country like you did with your perfect example you learn from TV that's crazy

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she learned to just talking to people that were on you and television television nobody's saying this is how you say this is a pronoun this is a noun this is a verb no no nobody told me that but a little high I had a cousin who live there Santa Paula and she taught me that all that stuff like this how you say this word school together yea or she'll give me assignments and we're getting to pretend to be a teacher and then I'll read you know what man for little kids that should be fascinating learning how to speak light bulb for whatever reason we decide that it's boring like learning the language like so much work I better be another book yeah fuck that Rosetta Stone to learn Chinese

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like what are you saying I'm going to learn how to read it too I could read that stuff and and say how much time would that take that would be crazy I took German in high school at for like a whole year and I got to add the night class but I didn't learn anything see for me I think everything gets super squirrely with with unusual like languages that use things other than our letters soon as you use things other than our letters like you see Russian you like what is what the fuck is that using our letters pull up some black Russian

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pull up like Russian translation like Russian tap this they got wise in there and it's such a powerful language it looks like almost like Viking runes or something like that sometimes by Braille it's a crazy out like two crazy looking language like another one is Arabic Arabic crazy looking like that what the hell is that man that's the what is that in the movie of Indiana Jones what is that thing that looks like a like a spade with a knife through at our hotel right to call acrylic okay look at the language like look at it when you see it written down was that weird Double K thing K left Katie

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give me the the beat but they have our letters to but they're backwards but look at it look at that again it's almost like look how they have ours at but they have a backwards capital r what words lowercase and it looks like that's insane like look at that you that you with a big dick what does that does use the big dick in the U with two dicks it'll be a little chair yeah this is fascinating language or is peace SSC I think if we lived on another planet and we were looking we were observing a giant culture that had nuclear power

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but they all had even agreed on the same language yet we be like what are these crazy assholes doing what are they doing they can understand each other that they all have nuclear power and I can understand each other so you're relying on translators in people to speak for you and representatives and I don't know man I watch that movie of clothing Council for the first time on mushrooms madman Feud and letting you write about communication with those UFOs and are you have a good thing they nae nae nae do you have on your hand thing yeah it would do with it

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it was amazing that I was wondering like what if we humans always think that they know what the other person might be saying right but what are the whole time you're like that's only in a bottle with each other Thursday evening but the problem is like what they're saying means different things in different cultures to it's what you just said on Earth people just have different styles of living you can't tell him the wrong in Africa or the right in Norwegian Norwegian cold weather in the middle of Iceland I should have went with Iceland but any place like that he's freezing climates who's right who's who's right like an Argentinian we had a guest on a podcast you said that he said that when they're performing he still there they were spitting at them

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hello why were the spoon at you because of how they say we love you in Argentina at when you're performing like they say that you don't like fuck that people do weird shirt then they got used to it right how about in Iceland they eat this crazy shark it's like a fermented shark and it's supposed to be disgusting for everybody else but them like they love it it's like a delicacy it's his friend in Bourdain Aiden he said it was discussed a bunch of people of eating it on TV shows and shit been like what the fuc up some kind of fermented shark Iceland people are some strong fucking people man those people live in Iceland just think about how hard do you have to be

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for the huge man I seen what I seen a video then working out yeah there's like a disproportionate number of the World's Strongest Man of come from Iceland big at Paul Bunyan

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if I drink a lot of fucking beer to probably try those are Vikings man that's what's left over that's what's left over the Vikings back before guns like that just ran through Villages man who is mother fucker The Last Remnant once people started developing guns then it became a fair fight then it's like okay before that man the Viking showed up you were foxville that was no bueno cooking so hairy ass words to Giant swords if they were all if there was an actual country filled with people as big as those strongest man guys and they decided to just take over there was no guns they just take over that's how it works arrows are not good enough catapults not good enough in the legs

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a little hyenas bro just wait for the mother fucker what do you think the same language do you think if the world spoke one language things to be better or would find other shit to hate each other for at least a little later somebody make their own language of people get to control e with the language since people don't say that word don't say this word people get control me with the language like to make our own shit

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like I was called problematic one time for what would you do I was just I did a show and this lady went on it was always problematic how do you say his mess mess over here that shouldn't wait for the punchline I've had that happened this weird like that lady should understand

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USB walked into my show you know with your friend that you have been warned you that I say words but you got to wait for the bucket bar tonight bitch turn coming up here hang in there but I remember doing this show and I'll just talk about my brother coming in and out of prison a lot and they booked me for the show me within that much $200 and I told my friend is comedian that at work with named Steve flies like a dirty that's what I please bro just be clean for 10 minutes please no surprises bro don't pull your pants down just a quick if you have a 50 solid killed it I would love there was doing okay I start talking about whatever stretch marks this is that then I said my brother been another prison a lot every time he comes out worse the first time he came out a better Thief

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the second time he came out racist like total races a Mexican guy in a third time he came out even worse magic your mother born again Christian food away from me like he don't steal no more he blessed you know that's so crazy they don't let you say that she said to stop you from saying that

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like this is a problem there's a problem people have they feel righteous when you do what you talking about stand-up comedy particular when you setting up a joke like that you're going to get your taking him for a ride they don't know what you're going to say next you know it's funny and to pretend that it's not funny because it's talking about a certain subject it's just crazy because it's not about not being able to talk about subjects it should be like if someone has a heinous perspective like hey I don't have a problem with kids get raped and killed and they start trying to make a joke about that Park a good luck on your own you know you're obviously heinous perspective but that's not a heinous perspective what you're doing talking about a guy going to jail and getting worse every time he comes out that that's also a reality it is it is a reality interview for people that deny that people become hardened criminals because they've been in the joint three four times The Joint what am I live in the 50s

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come on man it's crazy to deny that you were in there with the fucking criminals and you know you're stuck in a cage of course you can come out worse

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that's where it's fucked up right like nobody's getting any better doing that no no one ever reengineering the whole prison system no one ever reaction ears the whole people system and looks like those why why we just continue to have crime and made out of these unfortunate areas if you just fix those areas fix it you is it possible that you can have no like extreme poverty on Earth is it possible do we have enough resources to does anybody know why do people think that in order to live the way we live now that somebody somewhere has to live in extreme poverty is that like what they think or is it just a spot we're stuck at

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well I think I don't know that would happen if nobody really it will just be middle class and poor than everybody we have something cuz I know it's just Rich the middle class and poor

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the rich would have to give half to the middle class in the middle class to get pulling into the poor Jesus not enough money to go around sorry

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yeah sup was that real like if we are all the resources on her volunteer for what how people like I'm okay I don't see you working out doing putting in 8 hours no shelter walking his dog for free what is this a Billionaire's make so much money last year they could end extreme poverty 7 times she wears a profit in that my God that is crazy roughly six out of the seven the top 500 richest people saw the net worth the net wealth created this year is staggering 259.4 billion hear the top five richest people who saw a massive gains this year old boy Jeff Bezos in the house CEO of Amazon 30 5 billion to his net worth this year holy shit I don't know how to say that John was going to evergrande Chairman background group 25 billion

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fucking making bernardo's baby what's his name Bernard what Bernardo not looking at Cash baby 24 billion stukenberg Zuckerberg in the price that's a lot of money but here's the thing man if you're going to have a game and I'm not I'm not advocating for capitalism or communism or socialism advocated for anything I'm going to see if you're going to have a game

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and if you're trying to figure out what how much of a certain thing and if you own that thing you could do way more stuff right you can buy a private jacket and get a big house so what is it what are the what are the steps you have to take in order to get that thing and is there a too much could someone have all of it and everybody else have zero is that possible if there's like there's no rule that says you have to do something with it either like you could just collect it all yeah but in every game there's rules rice at technically there's no rule that says Bezos couldn't just went to you know for sure for sure no I'm not I'm not saying what I'm saying is is it possible that someone can appoint where they have all the money I mean if this is what they happen before what they JP Morgan had all the money at one time

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yes and I saw that that that documentary The Man Who Built America at one time he held he held a monopoly all the steel in the world but one thing that people really resist is if you try to make new money you know that's why people are like really edgy about Bitcoin you know that I owe ya going on this is their own real money they are buying houses with Bitcoin they were selling houses with big going to a Bitcoin listen man in this day and age with their the kind of trust that people have in government in government decisions when it comes to economics important stuff any cryptocurrency stop becomes more and more interesting to people because they go these crazy fuckers on fixing nothing man without when I was living in know while I grew up in the early so he'll Gardens Aliso Village housing project we had a lot of work my mom didn't have money in the bank at First or neighborhood

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I'm way in the back so they start their own little Bank like we had this thing called oh I don't know how to say it in English Capone dinner we get like I get 10 family that we know and every week somebody puts $100 in the pot so there's 10 of us and a hundred everybody puts $100 and we all take turns every week I'll let you know the pot so you and I and him and 7 other people who played $100 and $1,000 so this way this week Joe Rogan gets it and next week everybody puts it $100 again and this time he texted he gets $1,000 and then next week I do $1,000 so everybody makes $1,000

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love you lay the way we feel alone each other out money in the hood and work side on the honor System but it works out and ever and ever works out it always never fails because usually like in one guy little what do they want to pay something to happen like you know it'll look bad on his family in Mexico or we'll go home that food down

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but I used to do that with like to be the guy that used to collect all the money from these people when I was a little boy was like 12 13 years old walking in the neighborhood with a thunder the gas and passing it to this house but no one can use it but this is how this is how money marketing work in the neighborhood where everybody was boring for somebody

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but no one's going to loan $1,000 that's interesting man that's a that's a really cool way to handle it that's a cool game like our social game that everybody's playing with each other

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that's a cool way to do it I'm not sure that's a great idea

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I just pass it around that's a fucking great idea man. Something that's a social security that you would be happy to contribute to yes I get a group of your friends and do that that's super smart cuz I need to get these like a little burst of a big chunk of money yes I like it that's a social thing to write yeah I don't know who came up with it but yeah social thing do you know something that keeps people communicating with each other and talk in about shit and getting excited about it

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that's badass man my mom was a hustler by my mom so we used to go to fly live in Boyle Heights and it will connect to Downtown LA in there so many like so so many fucking factories and my mom you like she was just you know like with everything was we should go to this morning Factory in this trash can with throat they were in the trash can I get the band it was nothing but synthetic cotton so let this fake cotton made out of plastic would you take it out of the trash and put in Hefty bags they my mom would we go home and my mom wants sole Mentor pillowcases what's up wow

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did you have a crazy life

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you know

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I could imagine how did the little boy do pretending to be the little girl how did you do when you get out bro

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he was sucked into it

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she said do you think that he would have been gay either way you never know

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is it possible you could try me the deuce wow maybe we should skate maybe that's why they chose him my brother brought like I had this joke or what I have two story for many many years but they're not sure how to put it out there then my brother he told me I am you do that joke about how across the board and my mom made me dress up as a little girl I saw you sure mad cuz people going to call you that they going to call you and ask you if that really happened so what so yeah so early I said I didn't care and his husband was a prize

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my brother married to this city planner

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that's hilarious but it's crazy no Joe like gum how naive you know parents can be because my brother came out being a homosexual and my mom still goes why and my father too why why

► 00:39:47

do you think that's possible baby do you think it's here's the thing it was definitely maybe I don't know I don't know it might it might be but there is a possibility that you know people are malleable you can kind of steer them in different ways the questions are those ways good or bad you know it's if he's happy and he's gay and they became gay because he dressed up as a little girl if you really truly care about gay people is that bother you

► 00:40:19

it's a weird question right it's like wow man I don't know it could you firmly believe in equality of of of sexual orientation you firmly believe in total equality you should have no issue with someone turning a little boy gay

► 00:40:35

we really need but then there's nothing like no no I want people to decide their own destiny but no one decides their own destiny religiously right little kids get introduced into religion but sexually is work it's super important for us yes you don't let the boy be a boy after the Bo Jackson poster that motorcycle and fucking right around shirts off yeah man right it's like people get super scared if someone turned a kid gay like what happened what happened so people put some pepper and now they allow their kids to just be what they want to be but here's the thing I don't know if that's possible but I definitely think with no intervention there's a lot of people that are just gay

► 00:41:26

they're just gay was crazy mean that like this me like a there's like a spectrum of gay though right or the levels bro his levels like my brother negative my brother like my brother's friends are really really cool and the really funny but they're very flamboyant and my brother not so you know right who cares

► 00:41:56

yeah there's not that's a funny thing man like flamboyant gay. That's the gay I knew you know growing up spell flamboyant one but we like we celebrate that right like look at him when you see a dude would like a halter top on you know what I mean like Daisy because it off shorts like rainbow stripe socks on it like a damn go you go boy flamboyant gay like wheel of flamboyant gay

► 00:42:27

but like a girl dress like that is like all you unfortunate you unfortunate child like look at you with your 17 inch pumps on with your shorts up the crack your ass with your tiny top on that is so sad that you need that much attention is that weird weird that's weird man when it's a boy and he's gay we fucking celebrate the shit out of it all these crazy multi colored beads on and he's just fucking blaring day.. Hell yeah we think that the rave

► 00:43:01

but a girl just screaming out for dick for child you stop. Stop it you stop it what do you do you want sex jail just like her mom you're not going to get love that way you're not going to get love you just going to get a bunch of guys want to fuck you just low pressure on those were women those two girls because I remember that growing up she's a good girl she's a bad girl if you were a good girl I wouldn't be mad at you all the time Melissa Melissa Melissa I can be your cousin Jennifer she's a good girl I can't believe you did Coke I can't believe my daughter

► 00:43:39

dude people love cold they do drink I see you drink while but like once or one of my best memories it was like it was like it was like 1999 Thanksgiving it was like what you don't like Thanksgiving or repast and Friday or the Friday after Thanksgiving the Wednesday before Thanksgiving so it's like a best days Matt for me or anybody and I'm free comedy to especially the comedy show on Wednesday and then don't know working the next day

► 00:44:29

the story checks everywhere music the good times about drugs but this one particular time

► 00:44:36

my brother Fernando or what man was his name whatever I called him up and we're going to go watch out I have a show at the or and me another comedian showed up and I'm going to go see you when you had your your your fucking hot ass web page Joe Rogan dotnet you said you were going to perform so we went to go see you at the main room but after all that you fucking crust that is it yet that fucking bitch bitch it was hilarious crusted but then after what you said somebody that we're going to go to the House of Blues Chuy's birthday so I feel for you let's go to that time at the House of Blues and

► 00:45:28

Rick James showed up

► 00:45:30

Sia piano piano

► 00:45:33

that was a shit man

► 00:45:35

yeah man that was tweeted quite a few shows over there right how many shows did you do over there if they want every once a month or Tuesday he was good and was like wait a minute this is Chewie the dude who's the door guy at the comedy store is a badass musician

► 00:45:56

that song Hey chewy what's going on that's your choice that's a great fucking song that's a great song and I was sitting there going how crazy is this we didn't know I friend chewy has a special gift it was good I would have put me go over us he was good in school

► 00:46:11

watch to like it was a cool show but we had a good fucking time it was good musician huh he's a real good musician and he's our friend it was so it was crazy it was both was like you're seeing your friend on stage and then you seen your friend kill you like damn he's good this is good well awesome remember what time my mom was doing his his jokes that the or n he said Holly was fucked up

► 00:46:39

like that guy I look whiter chewy he's a rockstar Rockstar once a month kills it right now he's telling me what a fucking Park

► 00:46:50

well I think you like working there too honest I always enjoy that guy he was always very cool to me too

► 00:47:06

you don't need some people scared of chewy chewy and I always got along great now he just looks like the wrong through the fuck with the hillbilly jam Pump Mexican always a gentleman if you're a good guy to Chuy's a great guy to you but he's a talented musician I was crazy to watch it's crazy watch your friend just killing it at the House of Blues after you say what's up what's up chewy you know that song but that song Hey chewy what's going on that's like he made a really good song about how was the kind of man I'm definitely lifted it up and let me see what the fucking great man he was great like he was like he's a he was a guy that would actually go see like this is amazing I don't think I'd like to buy the comedian that when I was younger was like it was something to do afterwards I was crazy you know yeah like you don't like but sometimes you know that you go to like dark areas you know if you want to party hard

► 00:48:06

IDK one time I was doing a show in Montebello weather Barcelona and somebody came in and said things comedian yours he said a man so just got to looking for comedians to perform at 3 in the morning at the fuck are you doing should I got a lot of morning I ain't doing shit I got life so you give me the address we get there just like a undercover police officer security guard at his house in Burbank and um we perform at 3 in the morning for them but it wasn't shittin their house yeah man it was Joe the house was built for like party like 80 style where like we don't do don't even know what time it is like

► 00:48:59

like the coaches were there cockroaches all over the house you can see the sun coming no more really enjoyed it it perfectly like the house look like at 5 p.m. all day why were the house there was drugs but do not openly out there for everybody to take only like 4 like people who knew what was going on he had liquid Coke there like the you know the nasal sprays yeah he had like those filled with water and Coke cuz you know when you do Coke sometimes the coke is stuck in your knees in your nose see that poor little water to help it go down Jesus what this guy had a little squeeze bottles all over the house like nasal spray painted so I will see people lean over in the crack of the house and then grab something if so then I found out where it was and I just instead of just putting it back into the walk-through with a captain

► 00:49:52

God damn it was always I still at that house till 11:30 in the morning and I got there at 2 in the morning but this is funny that the guy who own the house here nobody cleaning the house so everybody like it like if you grab a little bit from your house like that you're Joe Rogan picked up those bearded through matter at trash can to give you points like like Dougie points did they was Doug going to give you like Joe Rogan got 3 30 points so if you get like so then how is it you got invited to the house Bike by text to Doug knows you but you don't know who view someone else invites you but now that you got points you know enough to get points you going to personal car that's crazy I was crazy

► 00:50:41

throw them out in Madison just look like I'm here it was just hired for the show again for the party I hate to bring up this thing with your brother again though bring it up but this is do you think it is possible really good if someone dresses their kid Apple all jokes aside is that possible but if you dress your kid up as a girl for a little bit and Coach him in the act like a girl that it turned him gay I don't honestly all jokes aside I don't really think it works like that stop right when they got here like or did he keep playing that way. You would like a male afterwards but it could have been a total coincidence I think everybody coincidence yeah it just happened yeah but nobody wants to think that people that's acceptable but they definitely aren't some ways right maybe not sexually because that seems to be like a biological thing but in terms of like Behavior like they've the racism for sure I write racism carries from from parent to child pretty

► 00:51:41

pretty well you know if they're they have a good relationship with their parents and their parents are racist that shit will carry and cuz a lot of people who are Races they still love their kids they're really good to the kids but they're racist to the kids associate really good like love with family also with you like it like distrust of certain certain groups and colors and that's a good thing that they're taught by the people that care about them like wild animals man they're taught a wild animal behavior by their parents and that's the same shit with people

► 00:52:16

it's a weird thing man so weird it's a weird thing that Humans Beings are malleable you know that the you can get him to behave a certain way and Iceland but then a different way in Brazil or certain way in Japan in a different way in China I got was I was in China recently one of the things that's crazy is when you're around large groups of people they just walk in front of you man it is walkthrough you they walk through little kids they walk through everybody and it's not rude it's just they have a different way of moving around because there's so many people and so many spots in China they're not being rude they don't consider it rude it's just different they're just trying to get there and you don't mind if everybody bumps into each other a little bit we're like I can't believe this head-butting each other but they're not doing it mean they just kind of going through each other like they don't mind touching each other so they are there just email you see an opening there going in that opening or you don't let that you don't own the space in front of you

► 00:53:16

it's just a little spot when I go in there and they don't think it's a bad thing they do it here to Chinese people do you know Armenian people older people were trying to catch a bus or crocheting kind of bus run the Russian front of me they don't say excuse me that's why I know how to say excuse me in Armenian the next thing you know when people don't mind being jammed up like that in the winter in Boston when they get on the T you know those trains like if you leave in Fenway Park and it's like fucking 0 degrees outside in the winter and you get on the T together and especially if it's sunny out so nobody feels creepy about it and they shut those doors and everybody just jammed in there huddle together like you don't mind your fucking freezing so everybody has Morissette's of that's a big problem with LA it's too easy to just live here too easy to like physically survive so hot

► 00:54:16

buy you get used to that you can't get used to the cold but you can't do it you can't stay out there you can stay and see that the Heat's way easier you could stay out there if you have a shade and you have some water and live you literally can't live in Boston outside can't go to sleep there you go to sleep there you'll die you won't make it it's 0 degrees out you're not going to make it so it's you can't just sleep on the ground when it's 30 below zero again Alaska some shit to Panhandle in the back hold no and she's going to be a hearty motherfuker to survive those places it's too easy to survive La we don't have enough interaction with nature

► 00:55:00

we got distorted sense of where we sit in this whole thing you want nature go to Griffith Park yeah if you have bugs that crazy bugs do bugs bite the fuck out of here we got this little weird bites all over you and mosquitoes are ferocious those are real bugs man we got here roaches we got nothing we got a few roaches would barely have any flies we got shit no bugs want a part of this crazy dry air that's the worst Super Lucky Man bugs don't like dry are bugs like the Crawley ones don't seem to mind but the fly once they fucking hate dryer that's how many birds eating them up to do we do not lots of hummingbirds anywhere else I've lived like there is here we rehabbed a honey bee hummingbird in my house and released it we found the girls found a hummingbird that was wounded

► 00:55:52

and the nurse you back to health and then be released in the wild with a little hummingbird feeders in the backyard did hummingbirds coolest little animals ever there so weird I put up a video of of the Songbird it's so cute but they fit fit sugar water

► 00:56:09

you know like super fast right due date this fly so fast that you can't like if you see it with stop motion or slow motion photography slow motion videos you can't believe how fast it is like you're you're you're watching me like well look at that's insane like what kind of animal is Volvo like that little tiny wings and they're going like a fucking billion miles an hour in slo-mo see if you can find one but there's no animal like that but imagine if an eagle did that

► 00:56:40

rational fucked everything would be if an eagle could move like a hummingbird I just a giant fucking turn giant flying thing with knives for fingers and it said snatching Fish Out of Water and it's as big as a turkey and it moves like a hummingbird what the fuck

► 00:57:02

like if you think about that's where the tiger is Right a Tigers a big thing that moves like Shane Lee fast look a little those wings are too I never will know who those wings are so small that they were in a superhero if I saw a superhero in the body was that big in the wings without smog like that bitch couldn't fly get out of here that would even work bro dynamically look how small the wings are look up big the body as it's fucking stupid

► 00:57:33

if you went to like one of those hot wings places and they give you away like that you be so angry about how no

► 00:57:42

does the tiniest little wings so such a small little animal but they're so adorable no legs are there

► 00:57:55

they're so beautiful such an unusual little bird to who eat them oh I'm sure everything that can snackin dishes but I think good luck catching them good luck catching a little fucker Leonardo book the other day and one of the weird things in the beginning of mentions is that he had a very weird Fascination or it was written one of those notebooks that he wanted to think it was he wanted to describe the tongue of a woodpecker

► 00:58:20

wow this is like an obviously the 1400 Square you have to catch the Woodpecker kill it dissect it he does have descriptions of it which at that time or so descriptive you would have to be a scientist like he was crazy how you would catch a woodpecker I didn't catch one of those fuckers know why you would have thought of that what was making him do you think he just shot it out of the sky I guess right yeah they were just like initially studying species it's like imagine just like riding down drawing pictures of a cat that you just found in the fucking jungle like being one of those guys that are the first people to document what animals exist out there cuz like how long we known how long we had a good sense of what animals exist out there

► 00:59:15

how many years has it been you think the people are good sense of all the animals in the world like right now we know about giant bears live in Russia right we know about Komodo dragons we know about Nile crocodiles we know about because we've got all the videos in the information but how long is that going to say how long have people known what was in all these different spots been 2,000 years has it been three how many how many thousand years has it been like reliable information no Krakens no fucking seadragons you know stop you making shit up like what did you really say like how long has it been where they will have a detailed account of what animals exhibit I was one of the things he used to I don't know how long they been a pen or something to ride on the 1st and they were wrote wasn't writing I think was like Middle East I think it was all like Sumer

► 01:00:15

those places I think that's where they think it came from GIF to see that writing man dude it's crazy looking called cuneiform it's like it looks like nails it's looks like they're like old-school Lee Carpenter nails and they're they're going left and right and up and down alphabet to look at it wow

► 01:00:35

that's I think I'm obviously I'm not an expert but I think they believe this is the oldest written language see if that's true it's cuneiform the oldest written language they think that was weird started then started with these little like they look like nails

► 01:00:54

I told you that shit dude it's such a fantastic-looking language because it almost looks like some crazy computer code and it funny how I leave this kind of language someone who's born in prison will pick it up and learn how to write like there was another inmate and give each other messages for the guards will know what it says this this is this is the one that's called to have meal to meal the oldest language comes from Sri Lanka Singapore into Indian states to Mill is still spoken by approximately 70 million people across the world to mail is one of the oldest literary canons of any knowledge in the world with the earliest piece of timile writing sangam literature dating to approximately 300 BCE so that's 300 years for current error that's not that's not super old see the thing language I think Sumerian is so is it there it's a Sumerian

► 01:01:50

first developed 3200 BC okay so I think you're saying what's the oldest language is active in the world and that's to Mill and that comes from 300 BC but this Sumerian language is the oldest shit ever so that's what we saw that's cuneiform says created using a reed stylus to make wedge-shaped indentations in clay tablets so they think as far as they know that's the oldest shit so that that's that's only 5300 something years that's not a developed or to talk you think which was more important to them at the time probably everything writing things down try to figure out what what animal is not eat you don't try to figure out what what makes people sick keep track of who paid taxes who did it so 3200 BC what is that that's 5218 years ago

► 01:02:47


► 01:02:49

that seems so recent think about that 5000 years ago they figured out how to write it down like what are you saying wow fuck and where and nobody had rights no more

► 01:03:05

I barely hand right I suck at 5 my handwriting deteriorates rapidly with every stroke I barely do it anymore still do this you know I dolt logos what is that logo old as you do at the high school it's like band logos Asia in time but I had to go back and find it and I just remembered it because what you're talking about

► 01:03:44

do you know when the first dinosaur bones ever discovered dude we talked about this once I don't remember the 1800s it was more recent than I ever thought yeah yeah something like that he was already president done with all of that all everything that they have written and talked about them until we go back and discuss was all before they even do like dinosaurs even existed almost yeah yeah it is really crazy it's hard to believe that we mean imagine you have like wow okay we think we got understanding of what is here and what's been here is probably been similar to what what the fuck is this and they find a bone this is big as a bus that what the fuck is this if I would have freaked me out dude you imagine you find a bone is big as a bus and you like holy shit this is one animal

► 01:04:37

what is this this is a leg thing going what the fuck is this thing that looks like a rib and what is this thing and not knowing how big the world is do you think of this another one around somewhere that's life but you know they said David Spade or David Spade watches that show they sent David choe to the Congo and Vice that's how I found out about Dave they they sent it and then I found out about it again but from Bourdain was telling me how amazing is the date sent David choe David choe is already rented the time that's how crazy David choe is he was wealthy as fuck like you didn't have to do anything he already made it gang of money like gambling and shit and he decides to go down to the Congo to go looking for a fucking dinosaur Madison craziest episode of Vice

► 01:05:37

these people some people that live there or at least they're saying they're convinced that there's any they could be just fucking with white people that that could be a thing to write yeah I could be fucking with westerners some Korean kid comes by like yeah about The DaVinci things used to fuck with his friends with the lizard dressed up like a little baby dragon and he freaked him out and DaVinci that you have to believe him because he's fucking DaVinci right that's hilarious add things to creatures pretend he's made a new species found a new species that look at Dave

► 01:06:13

it was young Spock II Men it's a long-ass time ago and she went to jungle wet looking for these supposed brontosauruses that people see in the jungle

► 01:06:29

I'm just not enough jungle to hide like someone else credible someone we get a picture everyone has a phone now you can people live in the jungle

► 01:06:42

you have to damn or cave in the water who has to be an enormous area where people never go for a big thing to be alive today the people know about like they'll find like a new dear you know the find a new deer sometimes like all look at us we got a new frog that we found a new deer this is Incredibles in the jungles of Cambodia it's a new day it's a subspecies of this deer rare footage shows the last surviving member of an uncontacted uncontacted Amazon tribe yeah I saw this support dude it's The Last of the Mohicans that's me while that's a cameraman it's a cameraman they fucking gave me fifty bucks just go out there and beat some trees I'm going to get some footage looks like Blair Witch Project and have you just whacking as a tree I'mma tell you the last surviving move bro we're going to get paid for this

► 01:07:31

come on bro you look like an old fucking guy that lives in the jungle just do it 50 bucks dude I'll give you fifty bucks what else you going to do today since I've been tracking since the 90s yeah it's crazy living by himself since the 90s

► 01:07:46

we got a weird problem with that right like poor guy what if he dies out there like that when he's going to die here in a different way what you talking about alone sad if he knows I saw those people with cameras probably Chase on with a blowdart if he embraced it just poisoned what a way to go get himself a nice pair of Nikes you know what Gucci fanny pack air Huaraches

► 01:08:13

come out of the woods bro 2005 are you when did someone in the world that man that guy's going to shoot arrows at you match that is a criminal they haven't even gone and gotten them shooting arrows at people you son of a bitch and wanting to get saved

► 01:08:39

look at people that live in a way that's different than the way we live like how we got to save them I'm going to save them I'm going to bring them over to the good side I know we got to save him but someone live in their car he's fire yeah yeah

► 01:08:52

yeah man someone live in their car so until that guy that got its camping under the freeway normal normal super normal

► 01:09:00

it was a guy living across the street from my house to live in Echo Park you live in Islam a Bow Wow

► 01:09:08

here's the thing right there. Did let Native American tribes control giant chunks of land they give them reservations in the 18 whatever it was was like 1865 or some shit where they did all this the words that I never to let those girls didn't get many to get spots so they give up they give him all that like think

► 01:09:28

when did that happen what was find out first that was a

► 01:09:34

my question would you ever allow them to live the march of tears right what is it why would they allow them to live like they lived before the Europeans intervene I'll give you really just left them alone and they live like fucking horseback trading you know animals for bullets Liz really learn Indian land for sale find lands in the west Sac raizy add Grazie molto drive for own easy payments perfect title possession within 30 days Indian land for sale is this real yes this is a real ad they had back then Nebraska's website okay this is this is the next art for the studio we need that we need

► 01:10:34

Indian land for sale make a reservation we need that framed on the walls need that framed to that ain't that long ago man that is not that long ago that is a crazy thing it's like we captured this shit from these people that will sell it to you who wants to buy it was a picture to do we jacked they got a picture of the dude they checked there's a previous owner this is the previous owner what do that

► 01:11:07

$20 an acre in Wyoming do you think that they have at now

► 01:11:12

$20 an acre wow right now I mean depends on where it is if it's in Beverly Hills byway 14 million yr Horton $15 an acre 15 bucks or not here's the the look at the dude that got the dude I got like the most Regal looking Native American looks like a chief but shot caught her foot like a perfect representation of like an elder like a wise powerful old Indian like a chief right he looks like to do the be running shit like we got it from this dude we got the Prime Cuts baby we got the fucking Tomahawk ribeye with the bone come on bro for you Indian Land the best nothing but the best we got to have that guy look it up

► 01:12:03

that's when it happened. The high is going to totopo could you imagine his parts of this country where people decided to live like the Native Americans live straight up. They wore animal skins they date and from shooting with bows and arrows they made their own bows and arrows they did everything go with the way that the people did before the Europeans arrived they say fuck your technology fuck your laws fuck your bullshit just give us a fertile gigantic swath of land that we could live like we live before and then people just gravitate to that you know how crazy that would be

► 01:12:41

people as fuck it up though they would do a reality show of it they would have certain some of the horses will have like fucking cameras and receiver be that fucking Westworld inch dicks flopping out of loincloth and people would have to kill people the way they kill people back then too they have to have duels and shit scalp um I think I don't know who invented scalping was invented by the Native Americans or was it invented by the white people are the white people collect them some of the shit that people do in war in the copy ship from the enemy to what does enemies doing it's LJ you will fucking do it this time was a bit of first of all time Ruto listen to that Dan Carlin hardcore history series and after the show I'm going to send it to you okay. To listen to it it's not so if you've got the time cuz it's like five parts and you get sucked in

► 01:13:41

but if you just shows you how insane that guy and his family were and what what the Empire that he created this one guy is real name is too much and I think I brought it was right they had all kinds of shit did catapult said they would like human body's on fire they would a real quick at shooting arrow while horseback riding extremely Stout people that were very very strong people apparently all I know about that I'll just full disclosure all I know about is what I learned from Dan Carlin's Hardcore History Podcast and like a couple of Articles I've never really read that much about the Mongols but what he said was that they have these bows that required a hundred and sixty pounds to pull back which is just insane so they must be shooting have your arrows that can kill people better than anything the smaller people are the weaker people would would possess and they were nomadic horse people as they were

► 01:14:41

travel around living in tents like they despise people that live in cities they were just the strongest most ruthless Army the world has ever seen the time like nobody's ever seen anything like this it would just be killed millions of people they think New York Times article that said they killed so many people they change the carbon footprint of the earth there was less people a noticeable number if you go and you look through the ice core samples and they're starting to retrieve it or some people research riveting that to Genghis Khan killing someone somewhere in the neighborhood of 10% of the population on Earth Dam 1 out of 10 to kill more people than AIDS yeah definitely right I guess

► 01:15:22

some was just talking about that recently and say no one should die from HIV anymore no one should I bait it literally shouldn't have to happen anymore

► 01:15:31

not crazy just take medication now when we were kids everybody was terrified of Asians at the end of that while eating Twinkies terrified of a while eating the thing that slowly killing you terrified of getting today's chill a little kid gets it everybody look good when I go to school no more never that one kid I'm going to school it magic got in there but they was all right magic got it I remember being in my car I was in my car I was living in Revere Massachusetts and rear yeah the apartment complex and I was driving my car and I was on the hot I was on the road listening to the radio like you know you see where the traffic lights are UCC remembered like burned in your brain like a Magic Johnson has AIDS what in my car what what I remember thinking like it was a scene in a vampire movie monster movie or something because zombie outbreak like oh my God

► 01:16:31

now it's it's reached one of the greatest basketball players of all time this is insane are people going to start dropping off like flies now going to start right away I don't think so we need to know where Savage The Savage seven billion of us stop pretending that when their you know fully aroused that the thinking straight like you you're operating at about like 10% of your normal resources C like AIDS whatever who's got AIDS you still got a cold

► 01:17:13

you know it's crazy that it was just primarily gay people and drug users that were getting it that's what a weird disease man that's a that's a weird one man

► 01:17:26

that's a strange thing that you're you when your body starts weakening and shutting down like whoa

► 01:17:32

but when you really think about the actual danger and death like I think even wall AIDS was in its height of killing people I don't think it was killing people as much as the flu was right the numbers on finding hour depending on worldwide or us so worldwide tuberculosis is now killing more people than AIDS but this says that only 1.1 million people today in the US are living with AIDS and I think I saw but living with AIDS is like you're at the border of getting AIDS so it is a site yeah you have a chosen supposedly this is again I'm not a doctor write supposedly it's like you have HIV immune system gets weekend

► 01:18:16

you catch AIDS which is acquired immune deficiency syndrome which means your T-cell levels of reach a certain count where they identified as AIDS right that's they're definitely connected so that's not people that also they're mean system fails that's outside of HIV so I clicked on it says that 1.2 million people have received an AIDS diagnosis since the early 80s since early 80s okay so 1 million people and there have been 12,000 in 2014 or 12333 deaths

► 01:18:57

due to any cause of people with diagnosed HIV infection ever classified as AIDS and what does it mean when people say I'll say it again it says there were 12333 deaths due to any cause of people with diagnosed HIV infection ever classified as AIDS is not a strange way of saying that yeah

► 01:19:26

with the I don't know what that mean it loses their classification if your immune system gets strong enough I don't know if this with diagnose HIV infection ever classified as AIDS

► 01:19:37

okay I don't know maybe I'm too stupid for that cuz I also saw was that a million people died last year from up adobe worldwide in this then contradicts cuz it says a million people have only been diagnosed in the sizzle in the US and other numbers worldwide so it gets really sketchy and it says 6721 deaths were attributed directly to HIV

► 01:19:56

so it seems it that they definitely think it's still killing people still is tuberculosis all the what is how many people die from the flu every year

► 01:20:09

what do what do what you think would be the most through most ruthless normal kill it would be the flu the flu kill the most people 36,000 way more way more people got jacked by the flu every year every year and what was the number that from the age number was total right how many of those people got flu shots though what is it how many 2/3 or so so what's a third age to the fluids is about one-third of the deaths of the flu per year if it's like we are not scared of the thing that kills us but way more will really scared of the thing that kills less people because it kills him through but sex that's what it is it has to be we're terrified that he kills people through sex cuz like the flu it seems like we should really be concentrating on that thing that thing is killing way more people people not washing their hands

► 01:21:12

but they like look we can stop that we can stop all this but text weird right

► 01:21:19

weird like when we maybe it's just because it's a new thing that was killing people because it didn't exist then it did exist that's probably what it is right like yeah because it came out of nowhere because it was in night what was it in during the 80s yes yeah he's on your lip I was at Delirious do you member Sam kinison's bid on it

► 01:21:42

did they say Sam should make fun of AIDS AIDS Sam is a communicable disease straight people can get it to you

► 01:21:52

it's not our dance

► 01:21:56

Crazy dangerous bit about it like way back down like whoa

► 01:22:02

if I can see you're going around like 1980 I don't know if that's accurate but so 1980 was the highest peak in somewhere on 1982 I read that there was around 300,000 total deaths in 1/3 of them are in New York

► 01:22:21

300000 total deaths 1/3 in New York in the flu this is all told ever

► 01:22:28

against the stats are all multiple pages so I know how many of the sea I get so confused about all this shit because some people believe that a lot of these people also or shoot heroin while these people are also doing a lot of drugs I would wonder if you know if they're really partying hard and they also get AIDS I would I would always wonder like how much of you partying hard is destroying your immune system to like if your if you have a disease like say you have cancer and you're struggling with cancer and you just decide to hardcore start smoking meth and then you die from the cancer like is it doesn't didn't something else kill you to write not saying that the cancer is good for you or cancer certainly bad for you but if you have cancer and you decide to go on a meth binge and destroy your immune system it's got to contribute to your health but we don't consider that will consider up the fucking cancer got them cancer got him it did get them definitely did get

► 01:23:28

but it was also smoking meth all day feeling good doing robberies dude was amped with cancer that's that's also be if he died of a heart attack I got all the cancer game heart attack yeah probably the probably had something to do with it definitely was not good just me. Could have cancer it's also not good to be smoking meth while you have cancer smoking bad that bad so how many of these people that got AIDS were like extremely healthy folks that like in a jog on a regular basis and ate a lot of fruit and vegetables I know I would like to get that date of this is not like a Prejudice perspective I'm just a curious person I would like to get all that I would like to know what is it that I actually does it is it is it the method kills you is it a disease that kills using a combination of all these things we want to tribute death to one thing

► 01:24:27

but I would imagine that with all the people that have died of the flu there certain number of deaths we look at the flu like man that can the flu could just catch you the flu could just catch you and you know Cassie when you already week to maybe you're you're run down you been working too much and then the flu hit you when your immune system is devastated and it gets deep into you and gets you everybody's vulnerable mean to the thing about diseases that's so strange to me since some of them are associated with certain certain groups of people like AIDS like AIDS is one of those ones is just so associated with gay people that it took a really politically-charged disease and we concentrate on it like really heavily but I think I'm really thinking wasn't just a gay thing was also that it was it was new knew it was a new thing that was killing people that they were always worried about that right as long as he's pandemic movies with some new crazy disease Breaks Loose just runs rampid we don't have immune system for it people start dying and I need to get the medication to the people and get it to the baby quickly

► 01:25:27

when people offer to get on subway sorry it's always some shit like that of some new shit it's going to dual disadvantage one that is connected to gay people and people I got what are they doing over there what are they okay well blood transfusions car accident or worried about getting from blood transfusions so that means back then they were they were like saying random people donate blood without checking it I don't think they had a test for an hour while I think for a while they didn't have a test for it then they have to find like I guess I have to find like antibodies in your blood or some shit like

► 01:26:13

but it's so weird that wolves all going on how many people dying from cancer every year just from smoking cigarettes it's fucking crazy numbers crazy numbers people dropping like flies and no one thinks about that when you see a guy smoking a cigarette you don't think that guys killing themselves or guys outside for the restaurant having a cig normal shit himself like we get really specific about what fears we have Drums of what way we die and when a new disease comes along that becomes like one of the most specific ones but while you're indulging and all these behaviors are also kill you and way larger numbers then diseases it's fucking weird man it's very weird human beings me included or so strange was so strange in the way we should prioritize things

► 01:27:03

always yeah you get the flu shot no Joey Diaz it though I Won't Give Up the joke is it but I think he has wait on the best Noob it's about it I never got a flu shot but I've gotten the flu once and then it was like 2 years ago I don't know where man just came out I had a fat ass bowl of hot and my whole body felt hot and I told my wife I think imma get sick so you can you hit a bowl and that's what it came on but I will stay with a bow but I want to tell you feeling it hot so the weed made you aware of it yes asshole yeah do we were short like a asshole you got the flu you better pay attention to your body

► 01:27:46

I got it like a couple years ago I kicked it quick cuz I thought I caught it coming on I felt it I was like oh I know what this is and I just laid down I didn't do shit I just laid down I drink a lot of tea chill the fuck out I didn't do shit I just lay down and relax let my body recuperate itself I got lucky that it was it happen during a time where I wasn't I didn't have anything to do that day so I can take time off I heard it that when you get a real hot a real hug good flu it like your body fighting off something inside your body your body is basically going to war you sweating up a storm your body trying to chase out the Invaders you got people trying to get over that wall in the in my body's way of organisms trying to get over their walls

► 01:28:34

you got wall set up to keep these things from breeding and you know taking over Parts your body she got this immune system just going to war you got a little war going on in your body when you're sick I know that everything is PCP I got weed fighting a crack fighting I mean people don't like when you judge People's Health and you know definitely shouldn't judge someone based on whether or not they're sick or what but

► 01:29:00

when will you're looking at when you see people that are sick including yourself all of us where we're looking at is an organism that is at War and we have this weird Instinct kind of get away from them like oh my God I could get that I could get that organized and whatever they want to get away from it would have one of the two troops jumps off of him and pops into me I can't afford to take time off work now get away from me

► 01:29:25

I don't have I don't have time for Lupus I don't got time for you coughing blood

► 01:29:31

but you can feel about how many people like

► 01:29:35

who don't know who don't never really take care of their body cuz I know what like before I won Last Comic Standing I never had health care I'll just got me with my body after we go to other than go to the hospital I was really dying and when I went to the hospital I went to his cheap little Hospital right here and Echo Park, it was fucked up man it was like it was real it was a smell like an old old elementary school in there

► 01:30:02

add Pine-Sol to the old Korean doctor there and I told her what was wrong with me and

► 01:30:11

that's what I have a flu or my butt hurts cuz I might have a hemorrhoid I don't know what's going on I'm bleeding out of my ass and she goes okay sit down and I should be like $100 and what you give you to give me medicines for the for the Hemorrhoid cuz I had to have one for the first time and then she gave me antibiotics for my flu come from is it come from you trying to force your pool out man that's why I didn't know I was on the road and I was in the low carb diet the Atkins diet and South fucking without a cheese mint meet all week your behind up and I didn't drink the water or drinking of soda so it must have been stuffed Joe in the bathroom like the show's over and like 2 days nothing right now I got like a feel like I like my butthole or Eve

► 01:31:11

I would like to have broken glass inside oh that feeling so I finally I pushed too hard having a baby I would like and then load up on the YouTube screen please and then like all mad I could just go I saw like I wipe myself and it might be the toilet paper look like a fucking tampon

► 01:31:43

and I wasn't paying dude it says the veins around your anus tend to stretch under pressure and made balls or swell swollen veins hemorrhoids can develop from increased pressure the lower rectum due to straining during bowel movements sitting for long periods of time on the toilet Eddie Bravo has a hilarious bit about it being on his phone on his phone taking a shit it's very funny

► 01:32:10

Lamborghini talk about it on here I think you talked about on here but it was crazy not good for your butthole to be sitting in that I will describe the feeling and the pain it feels like we're talking about in a bit I said that it felt like every night though that goes south side of my enemy by fuck you in the ass at night how many days did you go before you took a shet 3 days to share that when the pain started and I blew I bought a lot of gas and then like 3 days later like 2 weeks man have a friend of mine about to go to a doctor and they had to literally break up the shit in his butt hole that it go up his butt hole with an instrument and break it up and flush them out there something I think he had to take something some sort of diuretic and some stool loosening agent like some hardcore drug and then they had to go in there with like a chisel and shut off this concrete log that he had the boss

► 01:33:10

is butthole and then he knows he hadn't shit in many days drive to yeah it was dangerous and he couldn't get it out so he was literally plugged up and kept Pile in it it's not like she's going to stop eating just going to keep piling in so he's got a blockade of what shit rocks at the end of his booty tunnel and it's it's real product we bad a real problem he had to go to a doctor might like finally came out and then it was all bad with all try with ugly man painful after I finish peeing after I peed yeah I mean that's one thing that I freaked out about people that are on this carnivore diet I hear this carnivore diet stuff in there like no no problem sitting at all but no problem at all you don't need any vegetables you get no problem is it would it really kill you to eat some broccoli with that but okay though it'll loosen that motherfuking Lifeline up I just can't imagine the broccoli is killing you I think if broccoli is killing you

► 01:34:10

girl come on really there's probably something else wrong you should probably get your bloodwork done front figure out what the vitamins are if you eat broccoli you start getting headaches bra eat broccoli fucks about games are you broccoli I get a headache I'm sure Matthew Lipman eating broccoli forever like I was at possible but when did broccoli ever become something that you can you feel shity after you ate has anybody ever said that I got you broccoli it's fucking get headaches if possible my immune system carnivore guys a lot of them are claiming like I need a fucking child bro I'm off for a while people I texted him back at the other way in general broccoli safe to eat any side effects are not serious most common side effect is gas or bowel irritation yeah broccoli farts caused by broccolis high amounts of fiber all cruciferous to great word cruciferous vegetables can make you grassy oat gassy gassy

► 01:35:10

yes or not you fuck okay when you're a scientist use scientific term you don't take gassy with me but he scared of saying farts gassy but the health benefits outweigh the discomfort yeah so there's certain people like that I think have a real physical issue like Jordan Peterson is one of them when he describes like he he literally can't have anything other than meat and at this point is life or cosmetics and fucks with them

► 01:35:37

I think certain people maybe all bullshit aside might have a real biological issue with vegetables which sounds insane but it only makes sense to people have a problem with everything this is there certain people that have a problem with almost everything everything are allergic to Citrus is people allergic to certain novel titles all kinds of plants is the grass why wouldn't you be allergic to some vegetables so if you are allergic to some vegetables and you just go on an all meat diet all those symptoms of those allergies go away why wouldn't that make sense to people I mean it did everyone do so many people fighting off the idea this carnivore diet that you only eating meat you feel fantastic you're probably dealing with a bunch of people that have undiagnosed interactions like a negative and interactions with vegetables this is probably something about their system that does not go well with vegetable so they should take vitamins take vitamins and eat meat

► 01:36:37

better find a way to get some Fiber kids and want to get all backed up which was a good thing if you eat like a really fatty meat though you don't have that problem if you eat like a ton of Ribeyes it is Greece's up that whole pipeline you like what

► 01:36:53

everything comes a flying out I think when you start eating that lean ground bison meat you know what no butter like you going to have a problem or Butterball yeah you chew that shit down and pack it down the water on top of it so it's got he got like The Pact that bison here and then you got the water behind it and it's concrete to find it and its way through your body have some broccoli bro hope some kill some people really firmly believe that there is bad for you and that's something I've never tried I've never tried to not have dairy of never tried to like way off hundred percent. I don't eat much but if I do it's mostly cheese hardly ever drink milk and this is with cookies and whenever I do I always feel weird if I email got shitted myself

► 01:37:40

I've been and I didn't even know that my mom never told me but not every time I'm eating cheese I have problem to get stuffed off it'll come out damn so I fuck with almond milk and soy milk now and cheese with everything no more when did you stop that fuck my asshole blew up that's good move cuz fucked up that fiber and saw you feel good. I feel like people don't believe me this year begin your fucking fat Willy crops why you post the eggs on them just give it all up man I got so scared of the right I tried bleeding man and I said you know what if I could get your point so you feel better I feel good I don't know I'm have the runs out of that shit on myself anymore

► 01:38:33

you ever try this other types of diets or just the first one I tried the Hollywood Diet you know you wake up in the morning and do some cold

► 01:38:49

never tried that one yeah you trying to lose weight are you good no I could lose weight but I was bigger than I am right now because of 2011 or 2012 at stop drinking milk first and then I thought was cheese

► 01:39:19

then meet the hardest fish chicken little slow and what do you replace it with like what kind of food do you want my wife she was raised in Dayton Ohio by her mom damn and you know that they were poor so they grew up in in a trailer park so that must have been tough for them being vegan so I just started little by little while by Tory help me because she was not bigger and at the time when I started being vegan as I got it cuz I still love me man thank fuck yeah man like hamburgers ribs Red Lobster Jack in the Box number 5 you go and get your blood tested and get yourself checked out my blood test at 2 years ago and I'm supposed to get my blood tested this week again 2 years ago

► 01:40:11

and how did you look like terms of your vitamins getting enough nutrients do they do all that kind of stuff test your vitamin B levels of sugar and everything was cool

► 01:40:25

that's good just told me that I could lose 30 pounds

► 01:40:30

well because we're meeting I watch your videos every once in awhile I'll try to get into the ice thing you got into the ice things rough I want to man transformation know you know what's good to sauna sauna good for, that damn if it's team gets out hot when it's it really is like in the implementation of it more than anything but if you did a steam room most likely was a tile floor and you go in there and I will the tile floor before they close oils store and it just hot Steam and everybody just gets hot in there and then they get too sweaty and then they leave but the song is different in that it's a dry heat so you go in there and it's usually I think the idea is and I could be wrong here but I think the idea is that the steam room can't get as hot as a sauna cuz if it did it would kind of cook you because it's wet it will be

► 01:41:30

hot wet are around you trying to cook you as opposed to the hot dry air that doesn't make any sense. About that's touching you cuz it's conduct conducting the heat that's what it is right to the air doesn't conduct heat as walls of water does okay so that's makes sense because of the song that you can get to a fucking a crispy degree it crispy temperature before your body starts to freak out

► 01:41:58

that's at the old school hot like that the Rat Pack Sinatra. Take a little steam the morning get all the alcohol out your doesn't really do that but it does make you feel a little better yeah if you fucked up from drinking you could also run the risk of cuz you might be dehydrated you can run the risk of blacking out you know if you are if you're susceptible to that and you will get them all that it is on the floor there in the sauna Landau look at these guys that's hilarious we want to get in there that I call bullshit and yeah I call bullshit the phone I call bullshit with the photographer being one of the Ocean's 11 movie I'm sure you take a picture of us this is what we do

► 01:42:51

those guys were having a good time I lie I'm I would have time they were having a good time and it's a crazy look like in their fifties O'Reilly yeah they were older guys and they got together and they just did whatever the fuck they wanted then go to Vegas and party and everybody wanted to go party with them there at the Sands there the saying this as crazy you look at those old hotels and casinos in Vegas I just decided Dynamite them but what would you give to it to stay in the Sands today if they kept everything up to date but current with the era in which it was created like if you went there was a total retro hotel room with a fucking dial up phonez and you know just if there's something to be said for it right like if you if you live in a log cabin like there's something really cool about a log cabin right like you're living in a way that people live like this a thousand years ago man this is real this is really how people live but no

► 01:43:51

I want to live like people lived in the 60s like if they had a place like that where you had all the same kind of furniture just updated all the same log pencils yeah but have that shit like they had it back then how many people would want to

► 01:44:09

then let me like Vegas was only made possible because of air conditioning oh yeah and water they couldn't have pulled that off if they didn't have some sort of way to cool the place down

► 01:44:23

when did that start cuz that's a good question when I don't well the ice house where we do stand-up was is 58 years old before that it was some sort of a I think it was some sort of

► 01:44:42

an actual Icehouse will it bring up at some point it's history that's what it used to be used to be a storage place where people that didn't have refrigerators ice and they would take this ice and they wouldn't carry it home Jesus cry at that would not want to go man means less than a hundred years ago that's insane Soleil 1947 Bugsy Siegel Flamingo yeah I bet I bet it couldn't be I'm going to take a guess I feel like we probably talked about this already have just forgotten cuz I'm too stupid to maintain all this information and warm ibrance overfilled

► 01:45:18

I want to say it happened somewhere around the 1920s through 1950s what does no refrigerators for the 50s oh I'm sorry I was rambling I was going with boa Casino was it's going so air conditioning and Refrigeration would like the Wii what was the ice house which is a blocks of ice that they used to use for ice boxes when do you think they invented the refrigerator where they didn't have to do that for the refrigerator the ice chest

► 01:45:52

I'll check but I think they shoot the air conditioning to 50 so that the the big roaring times of the Vegas eruption was probably right after that then yeah yeah be like right after his invented air conditioner though the Standard air conditioner we have now but I have to work at 8 to work at Sears Roebucks and in Boyle Heights it's the old Sears building and they a 1987 with a big earthquake and I were working there and that you and all the water came down they have a old swamp cooler big shout out with a bunch of water in it and that's a real an old air conditioner by the mid-to-late 1930 swamp cooler areas homes by maybe 15 degrees but added humidity bad dude swamp coolers I like the name man swamp coolers it was a man of wood

► 01:46:47

I have to clean one of the motherfukers man it was a huge bigger than that for the whole building that's crazy and it broke another water came down

► 01:46:57

yeah man air conditioning if you live in the Northeast in the summertime it gets wet like I lived in Boston it was a wet place like when when the summer time I come around you wouldn't it wouldn't just be that it was hot out it was hot and wet you know things get sweaty as fuck muggy muggy it's a weird feeling but it's cool cuz your ear realize it's not going to happen very long you know it's like when when it is muggy the thing about like real contrast weather that's one thing we just don't get in California we don't get a contrast if you live in a place like New York you'll have a summer that is brutally hot and muggy and people are walking around sweating and our holy shit it's fucking hot out fucking hot. But you also have a winter where you've got your ship pulled up to your face your fucking die in man you can't wait to get on that train or that bus or hop in an Uber you just got to get out of this fucking cold

► 01:47:57

this place I can taste you that place you all pile out immediately run inside man there's something about that that sucks at the time but it's good for people you don't get that he'll hear my right here and I lyrics to 70 leg warmers up so they're bringing those boots too soon they bringing the dogs when they wearing shorts girls are allowed to do that we don't say shit they can do whatever they want basically they're running fashion for sure they decide right that's my fanny packs went away it's cuz girls that guys on all right that's what happen if I don't pay the trying to make a comeback I've been with a fanny pack then the thought of the only find a way to get guns and ammo for the funny cat funny pack and Indian side had a a holster for a 38

► 01:48:52

yeah you should have brought me some

► 01:48:55

does a video that Bert Kreischer just put up on Instagram of a dude pulling his pistol out shoot himself in the leg try to be quick Draw McGraw. Myself and Bert Kreischer with all of the tears coming out of his eyes

► 01:49:14

you so funny man Bert Kreischer is a new Netflix special coming out August 24th Netflix Bert Kreischer I forgot what it's called

► 01:49:26

but first going to be here the night before going to Hype it up secret time they will shave a s in his chest for Seeker time

► 01:49:36

you could do that guy he's a very good to have been on this podcast ones he's a very good dude very good guy we got a lot of good guys good time is a great time putting people in cool people and it's fun yeah it's play fun and happy again go across the street see chewey play when will when everything is good like that like it makes it's good for everybody it's like if it makes the whole Community is like more more positive and seems like we're helping out more young people coming up they develop a nice positive Community to and they realize hey man we're all trying to get somewhere but we're not against each other where should we should be supporting each other it'll help everybody and help you and help me there be more positive vibes flowing around everybody be happy like we Inspire each other we we're not competing against

► 01:50:36

each other someone does well don't say fuck him say God damn he did it I could do it to you can say I have the same amount of energy to be put into both ways of thinking about it but one way so much more positive for you and for everybody around you and still allows you to have a competitive instant cuz you still competing against yourself you competing to do better but you're looking at the people around you as inspiration rather than his competition and see me instead of having this negative combative relationship with everybody around it's also succeeding you have his really Cooperative excited feeling about it you know I mean that's that's entirely possible in business that's entirely possible and friendship it's like that's how people should try there or should aspired at dinner interface with things always try to be as positive as you can cuz if you give the same amount of energy you can give towards positive and still fulfill all those same amount of instincts of like kicking ass and doing well I do it against yourself like compete against yourself don't think about it as those other people or taking something away from you

► 01:51:36

about as they're giving you an opportunity to look at what's possible if you really dedicate yourself and you should choose that is a valuable life lesson like wow look at that guy doing so well or look at this girl like kicking ass and doing all this has she accomplished that I should write all those things how does she make all these movies how does she do all these things like fuck that people don't do that then Natural Instincts to look at someone who's like some crazy like super competitive person with the rock or something like that yeah but you see the right he's in everything he's in everything you want to sit on it but he's such a nice guy you can't it's a real problem but you can you could do that I could do terrible movie after terrible movie no one cares cuz he's such a good guy

► 01:52:18

you could take it to whatever you want it sooner than this guy he's a very nice guy he's and he's the real deal that's really what he does I mean that guy really does show up in a fucking hotel room for in the morning flight across the world and immediately starts working out wow he's an animal like a like you want to be inspired that guy is worth more money than everyone he makes more money than anybody that's ever made any money in movies he's so out of control every movie does the Blockbuster me while he still shows up at a place they got a fucking big one of them elliptical machines waiting for them they got to wait waiting for him he goes to town to do like 45 minutes of cardio when he fucking lands flying across the world lift weights for an hour but you just keep going you just keeps going to find a way to not complain stay positive and just keep going

► 01:53:11

I would have half of his book and I'm that's very like that around for you remember that when he was he was third string and playing tackle football in Canada he was living up to a shared a mattress with liquid the last guy who got kicked out of a team Jesus far to be now or Superstar I'm not even know how many how much money he makes a movie but everybody sees his movies he's such a good guy but he hears be really clear. Kind of genetics with that guy is that is just like we were talking about was Iceland that's the same shit that's the same shit with the Pacific Islands man that's some Warrior DNA son that's a giant man that's a huge super powerful man who fucking is so driven like we are lucky we are lucky that dude is not on the biggest fucking horse he can find with the biggest battle axe I mean that's what these people come from man

► 01:54:10

you don't get to be that big if you don't have like some sort of a great lineage of Warriors behind you you mean this that's so much bigger than most people because it's so big but all those guys like that guy that plays the mountain on Game of Thrones like what in the holy fuck that guy so big you know that that dude came out of some Warrior bloodline some crazy Viking bloodline because before guns that was what was most important to when you see a guy like the rock or you see you got like a conqueror yeah because that's what he comes from a hundred percent store what's that dude's name Chris Helmsworth is I'm worth

► 01:54:59

that tattoos of these God damn Spaceman or Aquaman what is this Jamie body comparison of the rock to the mountain who is the mountain Mount behind them 250 lb on them the mountain from Game of Thrones sorry put that again is that's like

► 01:55:21

that's significant and I got like six seven and he's so big so big I'll tell him

► 01:55:28

69 or some shit 69 dude that is so crazy I weigh more than both of them that's not true now the mountain was like 3 9386 386 he's 6 ft 9 he weighs 386 pounds like to put that in perspective former World Boxing Champion

► 01:55:53

fuck his name the crazy Gypsy dude I'm sorry no the guy he's the last guy to beat Wladimir Klitschko God damn it how am I cannot remember his name

► 01:56:08

Tyson Fury right yes that's it sorry Tyson that guy's a beast Tyson Fury he's 6 ft 9

► 01:56:16

and he weighs 250 damn I need some World Boxing Champion he gave up the title he was going through some struggles some health struggles some mental health struggles to and need a shitload of weight and then I mean got real fat and then got all the way down to like a super healthy weight again and I don't know if he's box since I feel like he has shit find out if he's box since when was the last time I boxed please get a box soon I know and he looks he's in phenomenal shape when was the last time he fought does the Wikipedia say I feel like the last time you fall is when he outpointed Wladimir Klitschko and then afterwards he had a real struggle

► 01:56:59

maybe just all the sudden became The champ is freaking out and maybe partying too much or something. Just recently right last month yeah and who did he beat suffer Safari did he beat him by decision

► 01:57:19

doesn't say

► 01:57:22

RTD where is it

► 01:57:26

RTD round for what does that mean

► 01:57:30

referee something because it's TD tactical decision maybe it's someone got head-butted and they got cut so find out what happened in that fight so just Google the fight will figure out what happened anyways if you go to his Instagram page he's Jack now it's shredded six pack that big mother fucker was the same height as him is 140 pounds heavier than him insane that's so big hundred forty steaks 140 T-Bones just slap them all over that dude's brought just shut that that used to be everything will be doing before acting doorman someone smashing people randomly I don't know man I don't know what to go to bed anyway so it's one of those guys he does those World strongman competitions together fucking straw for the handles

► 01:58:30

postal office getting pissed and for the fight to stand why was getting pissed that stopped his dude quit Tyson Fury's Beast he's a really good boxer but you know he came up to weigh over 300 lbs got real fat and then lost it all got done at 2:15 nice smiling and laughing on his Instagram so I can figure it out like I like that like when someone goes to the darklands then comes back by 6 9 and he can box his ass off he's very slick like deceptively slick you know he's a traveler he's like one of them badass Gypsy dudes like there's a quite a few of those in boxing right now

► 01:59:25

user let you know tough fucking people and he can perform Under Pressure to like he he gets loose in that huge man he's so big dude can you box he can box his ass off man I just don't know why this guy so they're just standing in front of each other and they're fucking around like two rounds almost and then he landed some blows and I don't go to bed here and see what happened to see what happens at the end

► 01:59:48

because if the guy just quit and there was no there's no point where he was hurt then it's disgraceful

► 01:59:55

so he's beating them up here

► 01:59:59

yeah what Tyson Fury is it legit he's fucking him up he's over the jet World Championship Cowper boxer I mean Wladimir Klitschko in his prime mean at the end of his rain but you still in his prime because his next fight against Anthony Joshua was fantastic could go knock Joshua down had Joshua deep and deep trouble than Joshua came back and stopped him Joshua knocked him down first then he knocked Joshua dun second show is like Anthony Joshua's clearly if not the best at least it's between him and Deontay Wilder right now until they fight the the best most dangerous heavyweight of our error and Klitschko almost beat him almost knocked him out so when Tyson Fury beat him before that he was beating a prime-time could go he just out box Tin Man so the dude just quit was he was getting beat up I was talking too much little bit more

► 02:00:51

so this gets all around with all the highlights I mean they probably should he was getting hurt he was getting hurt for sure like right there you got hurt but it but you got to got to you know try to figure out a way to to mitigate this you know you got to figure out when I mean he's going back to his his corner is not wobbling

► 02:01:13

you supposed to be trying to figure out a way to get past that dude and if you can't figure out a way to get past that dude why'd you take fight but I guess he could beat that guy before you got in with them and then while you're in the middle of it you know what happens who that happens to lomachenko lomachenko guys just quit guys quit on the corner world-class guys there on the corner and they just go the fuck this I'm not going back out there it was like one of his more recent fights against a really high level guy lomachenko so good he boxes guys out so convincingly they like look I'm going out like this guy keeps teen off of me I'm not making it over cutting it short right here and they'll do it with like a straight face but enough of this but that's cuz he's so much better like what you seen with Tyson Fury there that guy was definitely getting beat up and maybe he definitely needed to stop at fight but weighs getting beat up it's not like the same way lomachenko does like when lomachenko does it looks like the end is near Saint you better get off this fucking train we're going

► 02:02:13

ran into a brick wall in their mind that ended when you just give up who knows man I mean we didn't watch the actual final he might have Tyson Fury most likely I think probably hit him with some big shots and you know we're looking at it from an outside perspective but he knows he's in the big big trouble it's a smart move maybe they boo and they get angry when someone who's a real Warrior steps out of a fight but I can remember when Nigel Benn fought Gerald McClellan it was a big big fight of the time cuz they were both just knockout artist and crazy wild dudes with ferocious punching power and Gerald McClellan cut a shit ton of weight really way too much weight and he was a really big light heavyweight and when he went in there and fought Gerald McClellan or when he fought I'm not your band rather they had a clash of heads and it was a crazy like non-stop first round action work Boehner hurt Nigel Benn see do you find that Gerald McClellan hurt Nigel been knocked them through the ropes it looks like the fight was over and Nigel pain comes back

► 02:03:13

he gets back up and they're going at it and there's a crazy head but in there too and during the head but mean if throwing bombs back and forth but John McClelland takes a knee shortly afterwards and then goes to his corner and stops and the the people that are watching I remember saying like why is he doing that like why would he stop a fight like you know I did doesn't make any sense and then boom he he's fucked and then they take him to the hospital and this is it this is what is round tan right before this right before the so during the first round I see I thought it was a short of fight did join the first round they had collided

► 02:03:54

and Joe McClellan hit him with some big shots and it looks like the fight was over I'm pretty sure that was the first round

► 02:04:01

but when

► 02:04:03

when whatever happened happened to that right hand by Nigel Benn oh that's ferocious oh dude see I totally remember this wrong

► 02:04:12

I remember Clash of heads look at Idle Man

► 02:04:18

damn I'm 100% remember this Roxy cuz he got up

► 02:04:22

and he's in trouble

► 02:04:25

Nigel Benson again see I don't remember that's interesting how that works been you haven't seen a fight in 20 years and you have this stupid memory of it in your head that I forgot to hit him with so I think this is my fight

► 02:04:39

so I think he was a Greeley struggling at this point

► 02:04:45

I think that he waited out his whole count that's it he weighed out so count on his knee and I think some people are critical that a Time

► 02:04:56

this is crazy man

► 02:05:01

so anyway after his fight Gerald McClellan had severe brain bleeding was taken to the hospital and he's never been the same sense

► 02:05:12

damn man. Your dad was a beast man they're both Bistro McClellan was a knockout artist at the time and see if you Google General McClellan KO highlights the other thought was it was going to be one day Gerald McClellan vs. Roy Jones jr. that they were going to have a super fight that was like a big like one of them pacquiao-mayweather type fights for that error while Mega hit hard man I'm getting hit in the face like that why do I remember him getting head better maybe I'm just completely delusional maybe that was somewhere in that mix but certainly it was the big bombs from McClellan

► 02:05:51

that dropped him in the first round in the big bombs from Nigel Benn I want to see that the first round 2 because I from I remember it was a crazy come back because Nigel Benn was really hurt and that first round but just showed insane heart and figured out how to keep going where a lot of people like this fight is over this wind is over

► 02:06:14

but you seen those highlight reel she was in knocked out but now he's he's in real real real real bad shape he's in a wheelchair he from that fight he he went blind he he had severe bleeding on his brain and it never really recovered you could have died in the ring absolutely could have died so here's the first insane Nigel Benn falls through the ropes go go back a little bit go back a little bit so you can see how fucking insane is goat go to the beginning of it you see how insane is combination is I mean McClellan came out guns blazing and hit him with some serious bombs man look at this he hit him with a couple of good shot they're good right hand a good LED hook left hook the body so this is the beginning of the fight you think oh my God this fight is fucking over who that left hook left hook to the body right to destroy a look at this and this one is blasting through the ropes you like hole

► 02:07:14

leash it is fight is over Nigel Benn comes back from this to win like 10 Rounds later which is insane insane look at me clearly hurts kind of wobbly

► 02:07:27

but you're McClellan

► 02:07:29

just couldn't keep this up Nigel Benn survived and came back those are like Mad intangibles in a fight that's why the best description of fights is always the theater of the unknown cuz you really never know what the fuck is going to happen when you get these two world-class Knuckles Slingers throwing fucking Haymakers at each other like this look at McClellan then comes back with the right

► 02:07:55

any clinches now I'm going to start to get a little tired right I believe neither giving up on me, yeah I mean just got to think what kind of output he's put he's trying to win this fight and Chael Sonnen told me something once that's an old boxing saying something along the lines of if you try to stop a fight and win by knockout but fail you almost always lose by decision cuz you just blow yourself out so bad

► 02:08:26

obviously that's not totally the case cuz some people have crazy endurance and they can try to win a fight by knock on then recover around later but did the amount of output that you do when you're throwing everything full blast like McClelland didn't at first round is insane it's like sprinting I'm going to punch you through the first round he threw a lot but here's the most important thing is throwing a lot of them at full power that's why it's so difficult to maintain well most people don't realize is that most of the time you see boxers boxing they're throwing punches fast but they're being loose and fluid and when they heard a fighter that's when they spend the most energy cuz then they're digging in their throat and a winding-up they don't normally do that so the amount of energy that it takes to wind up and throw your hips in your fucking ass into it and all you're waiting to explode at the end that's much more than to be just a technical boxer so when

► 02:09:26

Tron technical punches they're moving fast they're they're not exerting the same amount of energy she wouldn't when you try to knock somebody out like McClellan clearly wasn't as first round you are running uphill with the weights a Cognac and you can only do it for so long so is we going to the second round like look you see is already really tired

► 02:09:47

so it was his school. There was this much his weight cut as it was his strategy to try to win the first round as it was Nigel benn's ability to absorb punishment and come back strong band is looking fantastic here in the second round look at them

► 02:10:04

but it was a big wake-up call to a lot of boxers that if you engage in Wild brawls even when you were one of the elite of the elite like Gerald McClellan was at the time you can still get you no brain bleeding and be fucked up in a lot of people tripping that to that weight cut cuz he had a year dehydrate himself quite a bit back then his game plan from his coach of the most catches guy out in the first round it could be but it could be that he hurt him and he figured he could get him out in the first round you know me McClellan was a killer that was his thing if he if he hurt you he was coming after you so I doesn't Gerald McClellan dead so when it didn't work out against I got like Nigel Benn Nigel Benn figured out how to maintain his energy better in that fight that's how you know

► 02:10:51

that's a dangerous strategy to empty all your bullets out in the first round to adjust them on defense for the first 3 Rounds in the meanwhile like that's what was his success formula up until then you know I mean I was that was what was working you don't know it doesn't work until it don't work anymore 14th do not go that way I mean to remember when we used to think that nobody could beat Tyson yeah remember we were little while we're young we thought I would see what it's like when did he lose 86 did he lose in like 1986 what year was that

► 02:11:29

Google that

► 02:11:31

he moved he did it what it was I was definitely doing comedy at the time and I definitely saw it with my friend Ron after-the-fact 11th 1990 1990 damn

► 02:11:45

so from that point on we knew he could lose before that every Tyson fight like now I'm not going to bother watching why do people want even want to fight that guy I just getting killed what were the odds of him when you like 4242 at 32 to 1 somebody got paid somebody I paid some crazy number I think it was 42 I think is one of the highest underdogs ever that 142 and he won by knockout Buster Douglas was fantastic back then he's blocked him up her well dude Buster Douglas is a crazy example of a guy who always had a tremendous amount of talent it was always regarded as like people that were in the know in boxing you know heard them talk about him and he would always talk about how smoothie wasn't raining and when he's at his best he's literally like the world championship fighter but he never totally put it together and far as far as discipline and training camp but then his mom died

► 02:12:41

and he decided he was going to fuck Mike Tyson up for his mother and trained really really hard so it was a perfect storm of Mike Tyson being king of the world you know he's just fucking everybody doesn't even feel like you have to train anymore he's just just being he's just being the World Heavyweight Champion that's what that's what they're like the reason why to become that guy in the first place cuz they have this ability to indulge in excess and go crazy buying tigers and Lamborghinis and shit and on the way Buster Douglas for that fight train like a demon and still almost lost still almost lost that's how good Tyson was when Tyson was in his prime as a knockout artist he was so lethal that even though Buster Douglas in him

► 02:13:27

bought and Buster Douglas eventually went up knocking him out he knocked him out after Mike Tyson knockout Buster Douglas down and Adam hurt and Don King after the fight even protested and said that the count was more than 10 and that went to Buster Douglas was down the referee gave him an extra couple seconds to recover that he shouldn't have had remember that was like a big protest after the fight

► 02:13:50

but even then mean weaving with shity training you know not taking this guy seriously at all even then Mike Tyson still knocked out to Doug's down and almost knocked him out with one punch what round did not come out Buster Douglas Tyson fight he ever had right Smith video here as both both knockdowns simultaneous so you can see like the different 10 counts I guess okay let's say it boom he click click them in Opera Cartwright

► 02:14:26

3485 or 600 that's so different

► 02:14:35

oh that's so different he was counting in a room and numbers yeah man it was the end of the round was the very end of the round so Buster got a break so that that's that's how go go go to the very beginning again please so I can go to the very beginning again so I can see the punch here it is

► 02:14:54

boom boom Africa that's a beautiful apricot Tyson the other more too

► 02:14:59

two three four five six seven eight nine ten you're out you're out now he's out he's out that seems like he's out right to three four five six seven eight nine ten he's out so distracted him my number eight yeah it says that stop account is that how that works with balls and six seven eight nine 10

► 02:15:51

yeah that guy's way quicker is that the same guy yeah oh that's ridiculous dude you suck at Counting

► 02:16:00

you tell me in Spanish all the one that's a fucking crazy hard job man you in the middle of the moment you know there's all this hype going on I pay the lease back out yeah but it's the same guy because it's the same fight so how has the same guy count real slow for Buster Douglas and way faster for Mike Tyson straight said he gave them both the exact same amount of time

► 02:16:34

cookout for Tyson first ready Tyson goes down boom what combination of two three four five six seven eight nine 10 11 12 13 14 got knocked on the right around 50 on the on the clock on the screen you can see it and you how many seconds was it put some up at 38 room right there okay

► 02:17:06

or five six seven eight nine they're both out now things definitely slower on Buster Douglas but they're definitely both out but either way if you said 7 I bet but instead of you know for sure if you've spent the count up by a second you don't think Buster Douglas could have gotten up quicker I bet he could have I mean he was waiting for the guy to hit 8 so he adds up right which what you do you do you take as much time as you can especially if you got legitimately hurt like that you're supposed to do that so the fifth questions like would have been able to if the guy had counted a little quicker and you know 8K more 7 was or 6 was would have been able to I think you probably would have

► 02:17:56

the questions would have Tyson have been able to get to him with one punch before the Bell that might knock them out yeah you know okay fight you get them back up again and it's three extra second to Tyson storms forward and connect to the time to get to head shot to the face though dude crazy shots bro so he counts way faster watching us the finger

► 02:18:23

1 2 3 4 5 & 6 7 8 9 10 out they're both out cold I'm going with the finger forever Captain White Glove Michael Jackson the accounting Michael Jackson with Mike magician that's a that was a insane fight though because you couldn't believe Mike Tyson could lose even when I watched it I remember I heard about it first and then I watched it and it's still remember thinking I can't believe what I'm watching he's going to get up and he's going to knock this dude out for sure will leave you lost it was like it's over then you couldn't believe that he could lose will that people don't understand today there's never been someone that was as dominant for like a scary moment in like boxing history than Mike Tyson because even though you knew Roy Jones going to fuck up whoever he fought the way he's going to fuck off you did not come out with one punch

► 02:19:23

wasn't going to be this whole riffic storming by Destroyer just come in after your soul Roy Jones box your face off hit you would lead lead lead lap Hooks and straight right hands over weight faster than anything you can duck he would fuck people up but you fuck people with a certain style and movement and speed where's Tyson would just like all anger so far to hood and you and he was solid like Sledgehammer 220 lb but move like a hundred sixty pound guy but you couldn't believe it at the time there's never been a heavyweight like him before it was heavyweights that would that moved amazing like a lie I only had the most amazing footwork of anybody just smooth and flowing and change what the game was in front of people the rope-a-dope there's a crazy video of Ali that someone had on their Instagram page one of those boxing Pages or he's fighting someone in the guy throws 2 3 4

► 02:20:23

punches in a row and all he's got his hands down I just barely moving his head away with each punch just like bet you can't hit me he just had up it was a bad joke about what he was doing that you would like how is it heavyweight moving like that was a totally different kind of strategy you know there was no strategies will be argued to the end of time like what would have happened if Mike Tyson had a fight Muhammad Ali poster in their Prime's what would happen man what would happen it would have been fucking crazy I'll tell you that if we had Mike Tyson in his very best before shit went completely crazy start giving out rolls-royce's the cops and walking around is Tiger his underwear before all that stuff and then you know Amanda was you know I beat him in that first fight no one could believe it no one could believe it even though Tyson lost to Buster Douglas everybody assume that Tyson lost because he hadn't been training and you

► 02:21:23

he had been been focused and then went to jail came out of jail and he looked jacked member ridiculous six pack member that shit that you would have faced son now he got tattoo on his face afterwards right after jail

► 02:21:40

I think at the tattoo on his face in jail right I don't think so I think he had mild tattooed on his arm

► 02:21:49

what does it say here Mike Tyson opens up all that was when he got arrested by that Joseph though Joe Arpaio guy had to do time and that Arizona has lived in Arizona for a while and he had to do that Joe Arpaio shit when they make you wear pink

► 02:22:07

dude Mike Tyson when he was in his prime like that was when he just got out of jail that was a Mike Tyson fresh out of jail

► 02:22:17

does 95 first fight after release those against some unfortunate whitefella the looks like he would be was his name Neely yes tough guy just wasn't video if it was ready for that I bought the fight is hilarious the money back he be a guy that you would say bring them to Peter and Peter break your face thank you owe money fuck boom he was the Irish guy give me some volume Jim Gray looking young and Dapper for just a moment before you go out in the rain your thoughts

► 02:23:03

my grandfather's

► 02:23:06

my grandmother's my father

► 02:23:10

my mother curly

► 02:23:15

My Three Brothers last but not least snobby

► 02:23:21

Robbie left hand for snubby

► 02:23:32

Medfield Massachusetts in the house that isn't that brought the guy from Medfield that makes sense fucking mad

► 02:23:49

Chester that's hilarious. Micky Ward boxing buddy some famous dude feeling keybox some old some old-time too damn it Jimmy just told me about this recently too and I forgot what it was but we are both like

► 02:24:13

should have been more than like 19 something like that I want to see Micky Ward Box was crazy man going to see live boxing so weird because there's no commentary I got only seen it at home yeah you see a wall live boxing match it's weird It's oddly quiet you know what is he saying

► 02:24:33

Gregg young that we fought in 9585 oh yeah that makes sense that's probably exactly yet that means I was 18 yeah

► 02:24:44

yep haha yeah Lawrence Massachusetts he fought I guess it was this guy Greg young why did I think it was an older guy yeah I don't remember any of those names unfortunately I erased all that Edwin curette hold on when he fought it when correct go back up

► 02:25:08

8000 Atlantic City Edmond correct is like a old old school cop dude yeah he lost to correct it was a beast Micky Ward man those fights with atturo Gatti those are some of the all-time most exciting and barbaric boxing matches ever win two dudes are just that close to each other like that close skill-wise like when they go out and just back and forth and back and forth and nobody quits that those fights were insane man my dad um he's really love boxing each other to go by scene to watch Mexican boxing at The Forum Taste of every every Tuesday night needs to be these crazy Mexican boxer but they were off for the way light weight does a guy named Ruben Olivares you want it was like wait no Pepino Cuevas you're an awesome mom Napoles mantequilla Napoles mantequilla Napoles

► 02:26:08

Mexico he fought Hearns right but yeah my friend and he does the boxing now and them or I'm Golden Boy no shit my hotel at a club and they have like young boxers is ringside in you coming to the no shit man

► 02:26:42

yeah man that's a crazy gig so is he e travel around with that too is he going to all these in the Spring Casino or Morongo those type of fights is a good time right now for boxing we have a lot of people Canelo and Triple G I can't wait for that rematch me to write I am performing the day before of that show where I'm going to be at the Hard Rock Cafe the day before the fight on the Friday get there early people road trip road trip road trip I'll meet you at the way in that is going to be an intense fight man that first fight was intense I thought Triple G one I just hold up they happen between now and the fighting with my daughter please don't get injured

► 02:27:42

going to be there right on time Crushers what day is that for November or November 3rd humans you know everyone's Jam didn't have to do that so many times for the UFC you know what I'm not working for the UFC I like to be home watching you watch it with your friends or alone chilling hands in a fat bowl sometimes I just want to watch it by myself but a lot of times it's the only time I'm watching fights by myself do UFC fight I'm not counting it's cuz we don't have a fight companion you know like if we're doing we do these fight companions like if we're home if I Got Talent home and shower and Eddie Bravo we're all home while a UFC is on the road somewhere will watch it in here and we'll play it and we'll talk shit while I thought you going on that's a little Eddie Bravo's was busting out some ridiculous conspiracies and crazy Jiu-Jitsu talk and then I might go to music we might start with talking about music for an entire fight and not even pay attention to the fight it's a it's a fun

► 02:28:42

big bad it's like with such good friends we've known each other for so long that when we we get together and play around with this is respect important in the history of martial arts right here this gentleman and I don't that that Family Pool that's it crazy contributing family to the history of martial arts for sure the number one family in the the history of jujitsu mean by far and are you be the number one family in history of all martial arts mean that's a debate that people will have till the end of time but that is a it's a pretty strong candidate for the number one most influential family in the history of martial arts

► 02:29:30

how to get that I'll get you started to tell me you want to go you tell me when you tell me where I'll hook it up for you will figure out why you listening Joey Tribbiani people show ID Georgia training every once in a while on the road till it turns like a motherfuker dude Joey trains all the time how many 3-4 days a week and you have to realize Joey Diaz gets on top of you you're not getting up okay except that he's strong man Joey is not just heavy he's a strong guy hit has man that I bucket back at you miss the gorilla he's a big old gorilla when it when I met Joey Joey was only like 220 lb he was like a football player is the old school photo of him I met him in like

► 02:30:18

the summer in the late 90s he he was like built just like I like an enforcer like a Big Brutus guy you know he wasn't I didn't get that fat at all but when he got that fat was also when he got that funny it's crazy like you just didn't give a fuck anymore with anything with food with anything partying became just a monster could so funny I remember the first time I saw him was at the Laugh Factory it was late 90s big dude Cuban Cubano

► 02:30:55

that is for sure

► 02:31:01

sure my all-time favorite character and they had let me hear for the UFC minute lot of people seem in a medical marijuana reports all the people see me the sports report but nobody really knows I lost my rank on the fucking boat right over is not the Donald green behind off my ride Bolivia that's why I train with fucking Savage not this little fucking guys flying through the air it's your lucky is what does Joyce Verizon to give you a lot for UFC and it's all about fucking Brazil this week I never sent me my man

► 02:32:01

what does motherfuker. Psychic

► 02:32:23

is that simple that's Anderson Silva and his family versus traditional

► 02:32:29

I said baby don't forget you and see catch me next week with all my other thing you understand me

► 02:32:40

thank you for the perfect music to whoever did the music mailed it up a lot of weight from now from then to now for Weight Watchers that's what he's doing but I think he is I think he's doing something for Weight Watchers chili yeah Joe is he he likes Weight Watchers that's how he lost all his weight when you lost the first time and then he's losing it this time he's using it that way to he said that they're catching up man they got good science behind their food but even they do they say you can have as many eggs as you want you can have eggs eggs and chorizo funny memory when you get here to the one bit about he said I want to do it Shorty Wanna and at the hotel room had a bad that you put a quarter in in the pussy in a physical job so it goes in your ass I went through last week I went to do a show 2 years ago though hope play The Rundown that the machine is broke and got to put your own finger

► 02:33:40

20 years in 1996 late 95 type of I started at the natural fudge Cafe in on Melrose no on Melrose on Last Comic Standing

► 02:34:01

the weather, standing how many people wonder how many how many different seasons do they have of that I want to see them 7 I think there in 10:00 now you know it's fighting Joe when I want my son's mom file for child support the next day that you just took half she became the last baby mama standing straight up dog fucking bitch that you took the glad I had kids with her and I don't know when I'm going to high school and I never pay my child support in well I can see your point we broke even you know yeah yeah

► 02:34:40

you know what's crazy when when the world Last Comic Standing did you like a background check of everybody yeah and I noticed would like some people were like to slowly disappearing you know from The Last Comic Standing is a criminal records some people were taken out of the four door like they were put in positions that you would take a photo of my brother

► 02:35:03

give me the lot of crimes and I didn't know it then he stole my identity Ono NBC investigative comes out to be late man I'll see you have two files on your own to open cases on you one of them for a ride for sessions of crack cocaine possession of sale trailer to go to court this is your brother is also gay another brother was not gay he's a criminal that keeps coming out of prison it worse that one that's okay my brother he like the ultimate criminal he's not on Facebook you not have no social media can't find him anywhere there's no photo of anywhere so I had to track down his daughter on Facebook it's a matter of fall picture of you and your dad somewhere and she sent me the photo of my brother and then they do the comparison of me and him and they let me go that's hilarious that is hilarious like committing crimes like yeah

► 02:36:03

human Court when you're able to got arrested that's a lame example as far as I know my birthday he knows my name so you was just using that hahaha what a asshole shit bro my other brother so rude he got pulled over for a traffic violation and change your name to my brother use his name and my brother with a bull's-eye they put him in the prison in in Arizona for illegal immigrants also your brother use both of your name yes oh my gosh my brother my gay brother Fernando is on his way to prison in Arizona for a crime he didn't commit oh no luckily for him when he was locked up I got to go with me and Rehab new me and it he will heal my brother and him were friends and he had my brother's back in prison few days

► 02:37:03

Brothers a piece of shit and he use your name to commit crimes how fucking mad you would be still my dad in prison for your freedom just so that he could get out he's a fucking fuck at me don't call me anymore I mean you just fucking social security number I know his name I know his birth date I know how high how high how tall he is so crazy what a psycho

► 02:37:28

damn man you can't pick your family that's the problem no problem for some folks right you can't pick your family man like anybody who thinks that there's a hey fuck you get what you deserve in this world bullshit little babies are born in a fucked-up family you know sometimes your brother is a piece of shit he's a piece of shit before you're even born your new window and you're born later and he's just ready to dominate you would be a fucking asshole to you and you like what you know that's what I believe ganga's Khan Genghis Khan became games con like later in his life but when he was younger he killed his brother because his brother was stealing fish they would go fishing his brother would take his fish was like oh for real so he got together with his other brother and they fucking ambushed their older brother and killed him the bow and arrow killed his brother what did that say mom is really pissed but you shouldn't let dad still you shouldn't let my brother steal my fish fucking

► 02:38:24

Lochte parent latchkey what is it imagine that man killing your brother with a bow and arrow or choking him to death proof Jesus Christ

► 02:38:40

or choking him to death because the mob or whatever you're associated with your brother got to go so you don't know where your brother is now my brother probably somewhere running around in Mexico living in TJ do you want some yeah

► 02:38:55

does he ever come back no no no he living over there he works at some

► 02:39:01

Pick-A-Part area over there pick a part to go pick up are you go there for parts for your car while since dude in the 79 Toyota in my brother go yeah you going to go over there junk yards junk yard in over 70 Chevelle it go and look and that's kind of fun you know if I had a hundred lives one of things I do is build cars I think I'll be the cool shit in the world you know and I envy the fact that people have done that have the time yeah that's the thing is the time so people who have learned how to do it and get a frame and figure out how to get the frame or sand blasted and powder-coated and you know figure out how to put the suspension on and fenders and like to do really take a car apart and restore it and restore and have it look beautiful and then drive around in it you see those guys that do that again

► 02:40:00

wow that's an admirable quality this like that's like something very few men would ever do but every man admires Amanda could do it like all me and my brother we were stored this 1969 Camaro I read that Matt Hughes did that mad he was he was also at the time UFC welterweight world champion also restored classic cars said that's a man you know that's a fucking man like you take if you could rebuild a car that's a that's a manly activity right there on time to life that's one of the most manly things you can do rebuild a car guys work on their own cars that's a rare breed Sun my dad always worked on his car man he never went to the mechanic yeah he will go out to eat me up there like changing the spark plugs out of a 73 Impala by himself in the rain

► 02:40:59


► 02:41:01

changing up in the parking lot man like all or like renting his own stuff to take the motor out of the car and put a new motor in and put it all in different kind of man and I know you like in my dad never liked you like the most and dad would invite you are feeling better help me out there to help the first time I try to help you know what branch are so judgemental daddy things to do like they did get locked into that they don't you distracting them that's the way they are escaping escaping by working on this car wrench and things down change carburetors and shittin those guys you could do that that's a special type of guy

► 02:41:46

do like this a special mechanic man is like you know I mean you know who got it could do it is when you invite those guys to get together yeah they always look dirty even if you bring your invite your cool mechanic in the neighborhood to a party and you wearing a tux give me like that are there goes John he still looks dirty I was the crazy fingernail dirt grease under the fingernails just never comes out even recognize him standing up hey here's a question Cooter how many how many people get sick from working in gas stations I would think they'd like working in a gas station all those fumes

► 02:42:27

what that shit's going to be terrible for you fumes and then all the grease and oil and you know Brianna she have been girl stuff losing tips paper them Pac-Man they know the kid needs to be a Godly to fix you know there's always a guy that in the neighborhood that pic don't how to fix everybody's car and it was this guy named Eli and they were big fan of those are there like 9 or 10 people in their family but this guy will fix your car but you also like to party

► 02:43:03

like you to party hard you're like like but he was but he was a Volkswagen genius bugs sting but he also the mean drug addict my friend Junie he was getting his bug fixed from here to ragtop was the oval bag of beautiful but this guy Eli Man smokes PCP Hall no we just hit me holding the wrenches and staring at the bug for like 3 hours straight not doing shit wow Volkswagen bug jar bug different kind of human you got to be a bug guys about how to fix the bug my friend Jimmy that same friend that I went to the boxing match to see Micky Ward fight he also had a bug hit a Blue Book

► 02:43:52

what's the most ridiculous car I'm ever being in it like we were laughing help silly it was cuz it was so of course right I remember you and Eddie Griffin the same car and sex

► 02:44:08

what is the automatic manual like the cleaner and shit like Harvey Keitel

► 02:44:16

and I'll let you know what I mean to give me one of those what day it was a good amount of power for the size of it was a very light car I don't want to say like the Acura NSX wasn't even three thousand pounds but that was it I had a silver one YouTube somebody bought mine it was black grey right out of silver 1 in like the late 90s and then I had a silver one in the early 2000s that's my that's right there that was my car that's it right there so somebody owns it somebody bought it cuz I think I traded it in when I got something else but it was Joe Rogan thanks for the Perfection that guy's got it that's my car to this day that was one of my all-time favorite car is definitely not the fastest car ever drove but it wasn't about being fast it was about like the

► 02:45:16

spirits of driving it was more real tactile it's a very light car and it's a mid-engine car she's with low right book is here and it's a Japanese car it's a Honda so you know it's never going to break I never had a problem with those like I had two of them I had one I had it for like 3 years and I trade it in then I got to this other one later but in between I had a Porsche and that ship broke down constantly I had a 90 1999 6 Turbo which is like 2002 that shit broke constantly it just kept breaking man all kinds of crazy like the shift linkage blue two separate times where I would go to shift gears and just disengage and was just floating around on two separate occasions that happen why couldn't shift gear and I was stuck one time luckily it happened while I was driving down the road so I'm driving down the road and it popped loose nose in second gear I said okay I'm going to win this bitch out and get to the Porsche dealership so I kept in 2nd gear just drove around and second gear through the streets like near Ventura

► 02:46:16

wow diculous they weren't wasn't really into driving fast is a car that Corners really well you know I like the car like that just idiot has a connection to the road dude look at that thing that's the new NSX that she looks preposterous that's a Preposterous looking vehicle

► 02:46:41

play Knight Rider the only problem I have with this car is the problem I have with all these cars they won't let you use a manual transmission they don't sell them with manual transmission the problem with that is, we're not racing like I want it want to feel good like if it feels people need to remember how much better it feels to drive a manual transmission everybody wants to not learn and since a lot of people don't know that's the problem they don't want to stall out look like an asshole that's too much work once you learn how to drive you still stall out I still occasionally but the the fun that you have it with a car like that with a manual transmission is so different so you're engaged shifting things about that and for whatever reason for forgetting that it's a totally different experience when you drive a car that has a manual transmission versus a car that's not a man I got more control right now you're better off

► 02:47:41

with the automatic if you want to be totally honest the automatic is going to go faster it's going to have a better choice of gear selection that you are it's going to like like a lot of times in these race car drivers to take like an automatic Porsche was in one of the new ones it take it on track they don't even take it take it out automatic they don't shift the gears themselves if it's a double clutch gearbox they put it in drive and they just go because the things are so good at picking the right gear why fuck around so it's better that way really is better you have more control of the car that way but that's not necessary what makes it the most fun and what makes the most fun is you're engaged in the car you shift in the gears better so smooth car quiet

► 02:48:25

you can learn how to drive a stick it's not hard I did it one time this guy taught me and Rehab how to how to drive a stick shift oh yeah we're going down here though. Pills to work at the top of La Cienega you at the top of La Cienega right when you eat the sunset it's like a super Steep Hill you got to have an e-brake and the new ones they don't have any breaks the new ones have a bullshit button e-brake to have a handle that you just lift up and live down those nonsense fix that like that's the whole deal you're stuck in Alex and Francisco street all again and it's a red light and you got to go for dinner in a stick shift that shit is a heart attack inducing

► 02:49:05

I'm with a federally back in that car detail at the top of the hill is the stoplight like oh no that's design for automatic cars stick shift that's a fucking pain in the ass Man motorcycle store how to write same way so most motorcycle guys probably be able to transition to a stick pretty easy

► 02:49:35

I'm pretty simple be neutral on a motorcycle I took some classes for little bit but then while taking classes couple people I knew wiped out pretty bad this is too dangerous by one time and weather in San Jose this comedian named Butch he let me ride it many bicycle. Someone without too much power is cool it's when you get into these like Hayabusas you know you can just go and buy something that goes like 0 to 60 in a second. The fuck is that you just sell it to somebody you all you have to do is get a license to get a license and then go by the most insane two-wheeled vehicle the world could have ever you couldn't even imagine something says this thing a hundred years ago if you went back to 1918

► 02:50:30

and somebody got a Hayabusa and brought it to you he be like what the fuck is this what is this the rocket yeah this is just as he makes sense people try and go flying off of it it would do wheelies and fall on top of them to be like what in the fuck is this what are you doing with this thing and it's someone could show it someone who knows how to ride some real motorcycle race car driver guy Evel Knievel Irish Isle of Man what is that Irish crazy race they do with these people are they are doing so insanely fast and looks like they're going through the woods and shit ugly this

► 02:51:14

Saturday is Isle of Man why is there a car there in front is the car for the cars driving with them all the guys is wiped out right there son

► 02:51:25

are these people that are driving

► 02:51:29

when it's not the race their own race or so yeah yeah maybe this is the actual race this is the Isle of Man race I don't think they allow cars on the road while they have the race but do these guys go fast as shit it's crazy they take Hills and their there they're flying through the air when they hit the hills I go to that fuck bro what is this look up fast he's going a hundred 71 miles an hour to the left into the right that is so insane bikes are so insane and the fact that you know this is a fairly new thing in human history this is new this is within the last hundred years we had anything that you could do that with

► 02:52:19

in Bisbee that they could do it with now it just fucking crazy man but your your moment will you have to make a decision like if something jumps out in front of you how much time do you have to be still waiting for the jetpack could look people are fucking stupid just go I'm going to run by as soon as I see him I'm going to run and get all the way and then he tries to correct for you and wipes out

► 02:52:52

yeah love

► 02:52:55

yeah it's like he was doing a wheelie before he could even get off the you have to be so tuned in like I don't think we could even imagine how heighten your senses have to be to be able to stay on top of this when is cars to the left and right man trees and shit is trees everywhere

► 02:53:17

is Kaiser animals looking fly over the top like that

► 02:53:23

fuck that is so bananas that is there's a video in real time of them all going over this hill ass like that like you really get a sense of it right there when you're when you're riding in the POV there POV you get a little bit of a sense of it but you really get a sense of it when you watch them pass by stationary cameras crazy people that Pilots fighter pilots guys that go there a risk taken fools man and again this is just like what we were talking about with those strong men dudes these are people that are there hardwired to do a incredibly dangerous things and I guarantee you the same people that are hardwired to do these kind of dangerous risky things they would be like Special Forces operators they would be Navy Seals they would be you they would be people that are mercenaries yeah they can do things that other people probably don't have the nerves for

► 02:54:20

and they're thrill-seekers like it but then you could take a thrill-seeker that maybe would have joined the military and put it on a bike or put them in an MMA cage or put them in you know a boxing ring and you get that same type of person does people exist because you needed those traits you needed those traits in order to be successful to keep your civilization alive needed big strong murders people you need two people that were crazy where the Fred danger you to Risk Takers you need to reward Seekers you needed people who wanted to be the king and if you didn't have that you weren't going to survive cuz there's other people that had that on either side yeah that's what's crazy is worth figuring out how to filter that shit into sports now and all sorts of other aspects of life but it's the same instincts that have been around for hundreds of thousands of years of turn people into what they are right now

► 02:55:11

blockman the trip really is a trip when you think about people just people in general like what the pads that people take to become who they are right now how to be this guy on a jetpack going a hundred miles an hour how fast is it going

► 02:55:29

very fast right yeah he's flying Jesus Christ

► 02:55:35

this is one but this is not I don't think the fastest one this one it looks like a Halo of jets around them but there's another guy that has one that are on his arms like like Iron Man earlier this month you're going to get it batteries get any better God would Festival of speed yeah they're going to get it going to figure it out I'm going to get the hummingbird Wings bro that's what's going to be cuz I have some shit was like we going to buy some cheap ones you know some from janky ones from overseas and a hummingbird Wings in a break off and hit in the fucking head

► 02:56:10

the people in downtown for the knockoffs glowing lights on and it would cost him to have seizures you know like for sure like you know Burning Man style lights all over here your hummingbird wings that would be amazing come on they'll be one of the coolest things of all time

► 02:56:34

Burning Man hummingbird glowing flashing light wings

► 02:56:39

I'll be badass yeah man just wants to cover Burning Man in a massive NASA engineered blanket 2500 square meters to trip balls what would happen it supposed to reflect 97% of the heat that would normally stay down there so we're going to go portion of it I don't know if they're going to take one of those space blankets with you if you're going hiking in the woods I'll give you go on a camping trip and you know you have like some survival stuff a survival kit one of things I say to get one of those because you build a fire and then you get under the blanket in the fire and the fire reflects off the blanket and it makes a big impact on the amount of heat it gives off and they think like for survival purposes it's a good move to have

► 02:57:31

where did I when I hear that about I heard that on a podcast

► 02:57:38

trying to figure out which podcast it was I'll try to remember but the those little tiny blankets

► 02:57:47

they don't weigh anything either so it's like a smart thing for people to carry around with do they keep you warm supposedly so you know I never seen one warmer but they're really good apparently for for reflecting heat but they can't keep your body heat in

► 02:58:03

you know it's pretty effective compared to their size and weight just like weird when they wrap people running a little late Chipotle Burritos to go to Chipotle uses those wraps to the other laughing I ate right and then how much time did it take to an eating it and you getting food poisoning one hour one hour but I felt like I thought of getting hot and then I get threw up and before that one hour what did you eat did you eat anything else or a little played okay

► 02:58:49

is it was the plane 8 hours before the food poisoning kicked in I don't know maybe 3 3 5 hours I know that's what most experts I never talk to food poisoning expert I don't have bulshit you but I think most people say that it's more likely that it was the food that was on the plane that got you won't even a plain bag. If not sure it was food poisoning and not just like stomach flu I don't know man but it was bad for like 3 days out of 14 lb you know whatever people say I got food poisoning from this might of but I mean people don't know like how long it takes to get food poisoning it's a little long as they could think was how many how many hours does it take for food poison chose that one two three one two three oh maybe I'm wrong maybe one of the server has dirty hands used to think it was longer did they use something was longer that makes sense then

► 02:59:49

Chipotle then

► 02:59:51

but I would say if I qt in three hours earlier and then right after Chipotle if they're saying one two three one is one depends what it is I'm supposed to take him that scary people get that from salad yeah he have run off man's runoff from the animal areas animal shit essentially you know a lot of times when they have these some

► 03:00:17

these Farms you'll get it rains and does a lot of runoff in the runoff is carrying cowshit and pigshit and it's getting into the ground and it's getting onto plants and if they don't adequately wash these plants and you get them you eat them raw you could definitely get sick see what Google. E coli what is the cause of E coli in vegetables I'm pretty sure that's the reason I know that they sometimes when you when you want to drive to like when I do show them by cellular Bakersfield on the right hand side you know you passed by these cows end of the lake and always thought I was water but it was run off it's all a lake of crap feel like this whole leg full of cowshit just fit in there. So dark

► 03:01:05

there's a lake full of pig shit outside this one pig farm on those factory farms they were there these warehouses filled with pigs and they flew over with a drone to get footage of it and you see this putrid disgusting body of water that's just shit and piss and then it's massive dude it's massive means like a lake that you would think you go fishing it it's right next to the end where we going to put all that stuff I don't know man it's going to go into the ground

► 03:01:35

did not supposed to do that you know this this thing of figuring out how to make the most amount of money with having the least amount of concerns for the life of the animal is the total wrong way to look at it it's just but when you're feeding 20 million people none of those people are where where their food comes people start making decisions based on money and profit and then you get to this point where someone allows them to or we don't agree on what should and shouldn't be done or we don't agree on what we shouldn't shouldn't force and force and we get to this place we have these buildings that are filled with pigs and you got to Lake of piss and shit behind it and these things are jammed these cages near got dead babies on the ground you like okay what's that it seems like hell like you you created hell so that you can make bacon like that that is that's a crazy that's a crazy way of Contracting or getting your food but bacon taste so good I'm out ecoli is a large group of bacteria with multiple strains most of which were harmless and part of the normal flora bacteria in the digestive tract harmful strains of eco

► 03:02:35

life or do something called Shiga toxin which can be deadly strain undercooked ground beef it's infected people through the consumption of undercooked ground beef something so it's a it's a toxin exist in cattle okay here goes this time however the toxic strain of E coli has been found on romaine lettuce which likely became contaminated from nearby cattle manure so yeah that's what it is before that I read about it as well with the other stuff I think it was spinach they had an issue with spinach in the past was finished getting over when it when the news came out on you with the other number watching Frazier Smith perform and he had a spiritual Gary it was hilarious was he said I'm spinach

► 03:03:28

Google does a thing of spinach and then he said it was a good title of beat up Popeye

► 03:03:36

that's a typical Frazier sunchoke he's so silly he's a funny dude he's so silly very nice guy that was not the exact kind of joke like like a good time to beat up Popeye guys

► 03:03:57

yeah but that's not from the vegetables himself that's the thing I've asked you those kind of diseases from you know their environmental toxins from the nearby stuff so that the let it was grown it grew with e-coli in it or it got on it somehow I think if you wash lettuce you can take it out but if you cook it you much more likely to kill it like for broccoli and stuff like that though you're much more likely to be able to kill it and I'll kale newest stir-fry kale but the crazy thing is like had that happen in the first place like is that a normal thing that would have happened on a regular Farm because we just if you just had a farm that wasn't a factory farms just let the animals roam around just be themselves without of happen is it still possible or is that only happen when you can you know contain a certain amount of animals in a certain area and then also try to grow vegetables in that same area 2

► 03:04:55

I mean I'm sure people got e-coli back in the day I'm sure it's not a new thing that people get sick from gifted and clean it well enough right away they're doing it or before refrigerators for sure they probably got it right they must have got it like crazy I've been people got food poisoning left and right before refrigerators oh yeah man

► 03:05:17

I know right before he was telling you go to a restaurant eating some of the backyard and you like oh well for sure it's going to be sick now nothing dead rat a dead rat and you catch up chewing on a dead rat you like what the fuck dude I thought we were friends why you eat a dead rat man that's so stupid get in the house got a nice next into the house you I know and I'm thinking man he's going to be sick he had a right nothing 0 problems hates take one time I left my car overnight. I didn't know it was so good evening too and I was sick for 3 days so bad did you try to reheat in the microwave and all the time so you knew that you probably had to cook it again that you thought it would be fine but it was too in the refrigerator

► 03:06:17

cook it did I get you it was good no don't speak old rocks know my favorite KFC is KFC cold with hot sauce feel like Elliot the patio anymore it's just too much traffic in too much I was like a line there's a line we like what are you doing what are you doing I do you know you want to start like why eating that but I mean there's like a habanero so there's a level of hot tub out there was a fucking hot though it's it's hot enough so it's like that you can't Echo shit just landed habanero sauces

► 03:07:07

lot a lot of good ones but there's something about habanero sauce on cold chicken

► 03:07:14

woo God that's good

► 03:07:17

but it does your favorite terrible. Jacob's no chance no no I don't mean I try not to eat it unless I have two from starving that's all it's available the most the time I think man how are they getting these tickets these those tortured chickens to live in those boxes at least you have bigger breasts but then you pass by Chick-fil-A and you like what the line about that's the positive line so big hospital Licious could taste a bun in the mayonnaise chicken sweet sweet juicy warm chicken I used to fuck with a little while chicken littles from KFC A Little Elm dollar sandwiches the thing is man

► 03:08:00

what you know what happened to get that chicken sandwich in your hand if you get a video to give you a little fucking every every chicken sandwich you put of of the chicken you know you can you get a number like all this is number to 16 you go to the website and you can access the video of the chicken living from the tower to baby check showtimes grown up check at the fucking clothes and grab those fuckers stuff some of the cage and feed them when he gets bigger and he's stuck in his cage and they take him out whack his fucking head off throw them into the furnace to blow off all his feathers pulled the guts out of them cook them at KFC if you could see all that if you saw it from start to finish the roof or the tell you how much dealing here or they would have tell you how much water would wait used to filter feed this guy who won more water for sure but that doesn't disturb me as much as I like the life

► 03:08:58

of a pig that lives in a cage that's in a warehouse filled with cages that's created a river of shit right next to a swimming it I like wild animals I like the way you taste I like the idea behind it taste like burgers and one time and beer Malcolm will cook you a cunt dealer in Ensenada and you will make it like carne asada appointment ever yeah hot sausages and it was good lot of people songs. Yeah yeah then send out a big deer hunting yeah

► 03:09:38

what is it there's another place on the Rideau what starts with an S Senora Senora Senora has a lot of big deer there people go there to hunt deer

► 03:09:47

scared as popular scared to go to go to Mexico I got to get me because I'm over here it's weird man

► 03:09:56

they hunt deer over there and turn them into tacos

► 03:09:59

does it all wild ranging free-ranging herd of buffalo in Mexico to be there one time and I left them there I wonder how Buffalo's I think is Buffalo then suck Catalina Island or I don't know where to get there while they show the movie was anybody in her Buffalo they left them there they used to be an island like one of those islands off the coast of California that had all kinds of wild animals that people brought all these animals over there to try to turn into a wild game Park they have like deer and elk and all kinds of shit rolling around Swan Island and in the biologist said yeah enough of that like this is crazy that I ate all the things are breeding is no Predators like this is a eco-disaster that human beings are created

► 03:10:49

so the store that I had heard was that they decided to cut them all down I want to find out if that's true

► 03:10:54

Jennifer Knapp that's true

► 03:10:57

Channel Islands so it was one of those at a military gig in the one of the islands Saint Nicholas Island oh yeah you tell me about this yeah yeah you told me about this a while ago right yeah it was a it was a it was like they do on the test nuclear weapons are in the ocean and it was crazy cuz they're showing it at 10 and like against the bar close at 11 but like 5 minutes before the bar closed 10 military police came in and

► 03:11:33

make sure it's closed wow and then we left that they say we're leaving at 5 in the morning they're leaving at 5 in the morning there was no lagging like I was running late. They won't let without me oh shit this is 5 in the morning supposed to get off your ass and head your flight Yeah well yeah you can talk around their son we did some UFC Gym military bases

► 03:11:55

did quite a few of them there you know what did the one downtown San Diego we've done Texas gentlemen North Carolina believe give him a lot of different places but there they get super enthusiastic man fights on the basis and it would be you know on think they did it on Spike TV I think there was on Spike at the time

► 03:12:18

but heavy shit man sent you something really interesting on Fox 2 maybe on FS1 a one of those Fox sports channels maybe Fox Sports One but it did so it's not like nothing else man when especially military guys fight if one of the guys like one time Tim Kennedy was fighting and he's finding a hot pan on the towel was a real world class fight a real tough fight and Tim Kennedy, left hooks on top of the cage and there cheering him and me know if that we've got him to break to like you wasn't doing this for the cameras who's doing it's like to express himself to these people who just bought for the screaming and cheering from the corn nuts and he's plenty of them telling them I love you I love you and then let you know I'm doing this for you guys

► 03:13:06

heavy shit man one of the fellow Soldier is that that base and then they all cheer and he wins like that and I hope you shoot it with the people there for you guys super super super cool so happy to see anybody on not just so happy to see anybody go to have like a crazy event like a UFC on their base and I get to go and see it in a great treat for them break up the monotony of everyday is good for the morale man that's big man you got to have more album in the Vikings new that specially did mushrooms people love like I'm pretty much like people who listen to your show man you don't know like how happy you make him you know that I've ever run into people going to stay at all bro thanks for adding me on bro like they will say I wake up to you to you and they talk about you like they want to be want to be here

► 03:14:03

did they like your everything you say man and

► 03:14:06

and I remember when I was walking down the street the other day and I ran into a guy and he told me a man I was locked up and Corcoran State Prison

► 03:14:19

opportunity for like many years and you are last call me you on Last Comic Standing help me get through the hard times are holy You Are Holy a whole lot a whole lot I hope is an ally of his what were they called the whole block was rooting for you you were going to ride if you didn't win wow and I'm thinking while I'm at least fucking inmates are watching me and they're voting for me from with a prison phones and I remember us with here on George Perez to write to him a seven-page letter stay up you know and he will call me in the middle of the night George Perez from prison like in the middle of like at 11 at night what you doing being free food in prison for

► 03:15:19

large or extra extra extra large letter Jabs towards a funny dude man Beast two funny guys could joke writer too bad you know Joey Diaz started in prison make people laugh and you would they would like they would have something going on it would be born that likes to throw the Cuban up there up there make everybody laugh that's how we got started it was a big party like we gave him gave him the confidence when you when you started at Jewel go out it or did you go read a book or like what you know what you were going to do when you start a stand-up how did you approach I just want an open mic night and I got real lucky that it was available they could sign out or was it Boston stitches August 27th 1988 and you could just sign up you could just go in there and put your name into the hat and you know they got to pick x amount of people I forget how many 20 people or something like that nobody does like 5 minutes and I just got lucky and went off

► 03:16:21

just said wow I think I can do this and then I think I didn't I wasn't good but I was definitely thinking this could this is a this is something that you could get better at you could figure it out and you could do it

► 03:16:32

but I remember thinking like there's no way I'm going to ever be able to have a real job I'm just too dysfunctional way to dysfunctional I was way too crazy like I had a lot of drive but I like the idea of being an office and being trapped like that I felt like a like a caged in Alley Cat like there's no way man I got to get the fuck out of here for those more often huh I just was too add man you know I mean it might not have even been an ambition thing as much of an intolerance thing was when I had like his grand plan for myself like I thought I deserve better and I'm going to be the top of this fucking kick ass it was I couldn't do that I can't do it but there's something about make monotonous boring shitt my brain is screaming for new experiences always that's my number but it's a good thing that's also a bad thing because sometimes you just can't you can't concert at things cuz you want to think about other things that are better and more crazy and more exciting more fun so it's like trying to manage

► 03:17:32

that mindset with a regular jobs almost impossible to me I couldn't do it I tried I just too I didn't give a fuck I wanted to quit done can't do this I thought it was just a constant grind on your skin just pulling your skin down and dragging you into this state will you didn't want exist in on some people different some people have no problem they find a great job they're super happy they make friends to be able to work with and everyday is a pleasure and they just get in there and they laugh and joke around but I'm too fucked up I can't sit still I have a million other things that I want to do while someone's talk to me about some boring shitt I've got like five of the things I want to do Mike I can't do this I got to get out of here like I can't take this so I was like stir crazy if I had a regular job

► 03:18:19

Mia I was a rehab out of the Rehab on a 1992 or the drug rehab for crack without somebody asked me what are your goals in life you know what do you want to do and on Monday with a bunch of heroin addicts guys from prisoners you know it was a rehab and then he chose to write off I think I did I never had goals before so I wrote that want to be a comedian want to go to Italy cuz I love Olive Garden and I want to be sober Olive garlic said I want to go to Mexico cuz I love Taco Bell hell yeah that's the same shit I know right about it man I just went to the Nashville Public Library this before social media and I went in with my bald ass gangster bald head and I told the old lady that is all white lie

► 03:19:19

that's what it is it matter know how to tell you this or how to explain it to you okay I want to be a comedian I want to do stand-up comedy but I want I don't know I don't know how to write I don't know how to how to how to complete a joke together so then she put me to the stupid she went to this big old a big old library glossary car with yeah and she followed me writing and she got me this book called call me riding step by step by Gene perret I did then I will go back every day to rent videos of Lenny Bruce and cassettes of on George Carlin on the library and a friend of mine when I was little boy he alone me this VHS and back then if you fuck with a VHS tape you can make it go 6 hours instead of the 3-hour movie oh yeah you downgrade quality

► 03:20:19

shows that I watched another all HBO's it was Howie Mandel part of the weakest when you win a little Christmas sweater and it's spelled and Jeff Jeff what what yeah yeah I know I think Ronnie was hosted in the dye smell than that tape so just all got all that stuff and that's what inspired you and I will look for library in a gift right down like ideas one day I paid to how old are you I was 23 24 and you like this is what I wanted to hell yeah and I wonder if I paid 12 bucks and I went into the main room to watch a real show

► 03:21:00

that's all men see I saw some dude named the Todd the time I saw this black dude with a fedora white hat Tyrie Tyrie Tyrie so the guy that does the props

► 03:21:15

he's too late he to inflate his body into the Elvis He one of the blue color of Comedy he does props he brings up people I don't know and look Taurus I saw Luke Taurus who who was on one of the blue collar comedians does props used to inflate himself feel but he's not a heating tour with a booth in the show me the iron and burned himself in the head up and then his face will be on the hired they don't do that anymore than he had like this bid work there's like a like a football player and if people chasing them and make a fake football player behind on brother and yeah and they would move around he had like these people behind contraption

► 03:22:13

yeah so that was what year was at I was like 1994 problems that's why I just went to the Natural fudge and I made Brian Holtzman bear in Jelly Bean Freddy Soto Albert man in the movie twins

► 03:22:34

crazy lineage man

► 03:22:37

what's up it's at so so interesting art form you know you get to know these really bizarre people and you get to get close to them very very unique way to live your life as a in as a person in a strange group of vagabonds trying to make people laugh hurry up at Dodger Stadium and I used to work at Yoshinoya when he don't know more play oh wow I was cooking food everyday like it's making Japanese food in every time I see a comedian I will ask him for advice he knows I'm so young and I will talk to I'm to kick harder t k Carter & Carter he was in the thing Brewster would you member t k Carter was in thing he was in that he was in a bunch of Big Time movie John Carpenter's The Thing

► 03:23:25

it was another woman there that was she was part of The Comedy Store strike with curly hair

► 03:23:31

I know she did a specialist Paul Rodriguez from prison she did with them yeah what did she do she choose to stand up comedy hit her and him it was her apology gifts and Anthony Michael something wow I forgot her name she's famous he's famous old school old school math easier to get more inspired or to get inspired rather today cuz kids can just watch all that stuff you just brought up on YouTube and YouTube plus all the shit that's happened so much right no bus rides to do it anytime you want anytime you're anywhere headphones on damn it sitting there watching a comedy special listen to was Bill Cosby my brother Russell whom I sleep with my first album me and my friend Jackie escalera I'm here he put it in the little Fisher-Price record player And I memorized it and it up until then I never memorize anything crazy and that alarm

► 03:24:31

are the niggest crazy that was a funny ass fucking album ever simple quick easy yeah I didn't come up with it well that one I mean you got to realize the world is a different place when Richard Pryor and Toby first to not necessarily I think is what it is there's like this progression and I think that you know what comedians inspired by the other ones around them and they were really just starting in the 1950s and 60s right so then is Lenny Bruce is probably the first guy who does our style of Comedy we're just talking about things like what the fuck is this what is this Lacey Jonas why is this happening who causes what instead of just telling a bunch of jokes he's talking about things and point things

► 03:25:31

that happened to be funny and then Richard Pryor comes on after him and makes it way funnier so what he did was like the same kind of thing but way funnier like Richard Pryor had to do was another level of evolution that he achieved inspired off the work of the guys there before him the more it stalls in the inspired Pryor and Pryor of course inspires everybody it all comes from prior like in the early it's like Lenny Bruce is just this genius mind opening guy that's dealing with people that are asleep he's in the world of the 1950s and 1960s or people just asleep so weird they did the disconnected from the world around them for critical thinking like they're just starting to wake up culturally and then boom Richard Pryor takes that and turns it into the funny shit anybody never tell you always been Richard Pryor George Carlin part of the deal is this a lot of great ones man oh man you know

► 03:26:31

call Jenny at all I did kind of puts meth dude he was funny he doesn't get the credit he deserves a really funny happy hour specials at our senior how many times dude he was on everything yeah a bunch of Letterman's and tonight shows tonight show a ton of times he was a monster Muscle while I got you when I work at Dodger Stadium I saw one of my one of my favorite comedians and I and I was working on a Mojo So fucking dirty I was greasy bro I had fucking pictures of chicken on my on my on my apron and I saw Steven Wright you would buy the hot dog and I said I was telling me about you

► 03:27:15

pictures of Oscar winner homie with bitch I'm sure you're that guy and I went around the corner where I went around and it was using two people share the right cuz you just walk out of here go to shake my shake his hand and he put his hand and said of his hoodie sorry it's all right. Even know if my hair with cotton

► 03:27:57

hilarious dude that's hilarious I must have freaked them out you though you know you're a strong cup of tea

► 03:28:05

it's going to do he's a super white guy from Boston Tylo mad cuz I know I don't go nowhere I get a real problem statement logo no worries like this is not what I'm looking for I'm looking for how you doing you really funny thanks bye. Thank you very much appreciate it I forgot to hear I don't know where I don't repeat next to John Ritter at Dodger Stadium Ann and that's the last song

► 03:28:40

he hates me how to beat us and started walking to the other side of the trough that's so funny that's so funny and it's you humming. At least you're ridiculous but I told me he was a real nice guy it was such a bummer when he died it was one thing I mean in real life I mean in the show my character was supposedly try but I don't think it would never successful it's hard to remember so long ago you know I was watching the clip of it the other day online somebody put something up online

► 03:29:40

me and Phil Hartman I literally didn't even remember it I was watching like it was something that wasn't even me like this is weird weird to watch you know where to watch yourself when you know what yourself but you have no recollection of it and it's from 20 years ago

► 03:30:01

you know what you watched you look at Last Comic Standing how many years ago was at 7 no 8 to the freak you out when you go back and watch it yeah and grill grill and now I grill my teeth what kind of Grill did you have a fucked up bro dude what's up with those are man-made teeth does that mean that they just put in my mouth oh yeah did you want to get along bro Siri likes that booty like good fake teeth and screw him on Friday but then my gums were too weak from meth and crack smoking ticket

► 03:31:01

today I just know me and they took off for teeth out what a shame I'm old my I can please don't know what they're called and they took my teeth out if phone is the other but give me the mode of my mouth was for perfect teeth and it just glued it to my mouth glued it glued in place right now yeah how long it lasts so long as I keep them good it just it just cemented there's Purge parody forever with glue

► 03:31:35

it looks great you look fantastic before but I might see what fucked up by the apple and a little bit three people did it I know blood

► 03:31:46

people make fun of me. You floss of rope or what is bad for your gum bad for the gums make sense so you want to avoid bad teeth dumps north New Jersey to physical gets your mouth still gets in there so yeah I brush after every puff that's a good one of you got to take a swig of Listerine

► 03:32:25

I believe a word you like way over 3 hours right yeah crazy bro crazy bro yeah this is the glass tips is Jennifer Beal week and at the end of the month I'll be at the Brea Improv and check out my dates at flippers world.com tour go see Felipe he's a monster what's up fool podcast available on iTunes and everywhere podcaster heard

► 03:33:13

Oprah Winfrey bro thank you everybody like people come here but I'm not saying everybody bunch of the people who are real man that just the people sell shit man like you like you like where what where Howard Stern was you like Oprah Howard Stern podcast. I just want to get have some fun and we had some fun in the in the cage that was tight all the immigration in America

► 03:33:55

fun times ladies gentlemen may be a little slippery little too hyper apps that was dangerous when ever have felt felt Stoners in the show and we just start going on with the worst can happen to me one more hit one more hit one more that was for hits in to a blunt that Jamie bought those blunts or they're just different it's a different experience of the blunt gives you this crazy tobacco thing along with the marijuana thing and it does somehow or another together they think they kakka kakka they packed a hell of a wallop anyway. It's awesome and make sure you check out his podcast to see what's up fool podcast thank you to our sponsors thank you to LegalZoom go to legalzoom.com use the enter the code Rogen and referral box at checkout for more savings savings National make a will Matthew Fox get it together

► 03:34:49

that's Rogan at legalzoom.com thank you also to the cash app longtime sponsor the podcasts in an in an excellent excellent application for your phone it really is very convenient way to pay people back in a very convenient would also buy Bitcoin and even as I said you could deposit your paycheck right into the app and you can use that cash card to cash Booth program make sure when you download the application the cash app for either Android or iPhones make sure you use the reward code Joe Rogan all one word and you receive $5 in the cash app will send $5 to a good friend Justin ran for his fight for the Forgotten charity

► 03:35:30

and thank you also the Dollar Shave Club don't fuck around once you have this in your life it's just one of those things you just going to pay five bucks a month for it's just better get those blades and that shea butter get that shaped butter and you know you need that in your life get those one wipe Charlies why you trying to pretend the toilet paper and smearing who all of your bunghole good enough it's not good enough it's not get all that stuff at dollar shave club.com for five bucks to get their daily essential Starter Set comes with body cleanser one wipe Charlies the world famous shave butter their best razor the six blade executive which I was talking about the fourth one I use keep those boys coming for a few bucks a month at in shampoo toothpaste anything else you need for the bathroom check it all out at dollarshaveclub.com Rogan that's dollarshaveclub.com forward slash Rogan Tom Tom Tom Tom Tom

► 03:36:23

we did it talks we fucking did it yes tomorrow we have a real smart person and actual cosmetologist physics Professor Sean Carroll he has been on the podcast before and he's a fascinating individual with a great deep insight into the all things science and astrophysics and space travel in his research professor at the department of physics to California Institute of Technology were very excited to have them tomorrow that's going to be a lot of fun get the strong weed out that one you want to get it Steve I don't want to get in that car we don't know what the fuck you're saying and forgot what he was talking about you know what that you want Steven you want like one and a half hits don't get crazy don't start thinking about your childhood don't start freaking out about things that happened 20 years ago I want you to I want you to be in the moment to this one be in the moment be in the moment if you taking that Jambo marijuana in hand

► 03:37:23

breath spray I want two pumps no more don't go crazy it's not worth it it's not worth reading about your mortality when you talk to you about what we know now about black holes... And he is about to start a new podcast as well this podcast think I do not know if it has started is called the mindscape podcast and he will most certainly be talking about that tomorrow he goes conversations with the world's most interesting thinkers so he already has several episodes out

► 03:38:01

looks like you guys 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 episode top go get that shit that's it