#1190 - Joey Diaz

October 29, 2018

Joey “CoCo” Diaz is a Cuban-American stand up comedian and actor. Joey also hosts his own podcast called “The Church of What’s Happening Now”. He will be featured on the Netflix Stand Up Series "The Degenerates" premiering on October 30.

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ladies and gentlemen welcome to the show that sounds very Disney I was just Disneyland Joey Diaz is on the show today and is Netflix special is out tonight it is today is the 29th on the 30th October 30th his Netflix special airs so don't fucking sleep on that shit mines out right now it's called strange times what is Joey's called degenerate it's a series with our good friend Christina pazsitzky she's on it big Jay oakerson has a special yamaneika

she has a special is that it Liza treyger and Brad Williams and Broadway

but we're here for Joey Diaz and that shoots out okay alright

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The Joe Rogan Experience

I said that once you clean for 29 days while smoking reefer that's it why go back yeah I like it if I have a 29 days I go I'd let my lungs fucking heal from the abuse I have inflicted on him the last dirty fucking the first of all I haven't had the Bull since like I broke it in Boston September 29th so out of respect for sober October I didn't do a lot of people I haven't done that apple cider that something is wrong with my stomach so I figured out if I was lactose intolerant lactose intolerant type of cheese or milk and I'm farting up you know it's a nice so I had to cut that out of my diet what should I eat cheese the light on the American cheese now no Swiss no more no Cuban sandwiches it's fucking crazy and that I had to cut out the edible

give me a weird feeling

just going to run in and it just gone somewhere else and I didn't like the hunger issues of the munchy. Anger issues after 11 would just monstrous like here I am working hard to lose weight I stick to it and then I go home I start with an apple another Apple I'm a 9 another banana then you got to bust out the salami sandwich with the fucking amorino I wish I was just getting bad I could not control it could not uncontrollable the hunger from Edibles every minute after 11 for me was uncontrollable Blitzkrieg you don't just get like a little fucked up know when it starts early we starting early 2 in the afternoon and pop another two at fucking 6 do you like vaporizing no no just smoking I care about your lungs you take me up at a hotel

party Smart Start in the morning when I'm having coffee in my hotel room right in my notes for the thought of the day because I don't wake up with Hunger see that was my problem all those years I would need till 1 if the if you want to be a fat fuck don't eat till 1 when you wake up because then you got to make up for the rest of the day so now I have to force myself to eat what do you mean because why do you guys like the way I can live with that money means my shit goes up and down my blood pressure my blood sugar so I could never intimate fast but in the old days I'd be coked up and I wake up Speedy still so I wouldn't eat breakfast but I still need that one or two and would not stop till fucking 2 in the morning you saw me I'll be in those pink. Sandwiches like they would not do meatball sandwiches at 12 because I wouldn't eat breakfast I force myself to eat and you know for years what was he eating every 6 hours you supposed to eat

call the portion you know I'm saying so I got to eat breakfast and I can eat two egg yolks a piece of wheat toast and fruit and I'm good like 4 so Brock told her I gave up bacon and it's for five points on Weight Watchers that's all I'm allowed but at least I'm allowed two pieces of bacon too busy making is all you really need is a baked potato some greedy what I was for 18 between you and I my wife who's on the south would make the whole packet of Oscar Meyer center cut bacon

the whole pack every morning that was my breakfast hold back the whole package with three eggs a half a loaf of Wonder bread and butter and a 16oz Coke the boot Coke on top of it oh yeah I could drink to cook for breakfast I grew up in the east coast and I caught a bad habit early on after my mother died I caught that I didn't have we needed home I would leave and eat at the deli I went on the number one fucking cream cheese and jelly on a on a roll with big you sugar I used to open up with cream cheese and jelly on a poppy seed roll with a 16oz Coke for breakfast for years and I was in shape that that's the thing you know you can't remember that nobody eats cream cheese and jelly for breakfast in a row

cream cheese and jelly people know better now in New Jersey in those diners I got those bran muffins you going to get those bran muffins they put them on the grill with butter on them good googly-moogly oh my goodness you just shop now I got to go to young and dumb as I get up bran muffins with raisins in it and was that nobody or nothing but they cut them in half on the East Coast those East Coast breakfast horrible how long you been doing this Weight Watchers thing now just December night so almost a year yeah but 30 but that's nice that's a good weight and over the amount of time cuz it's graduate I didn't have the only week I miss my fitness goals I have to have 72

points of activity and I only missed it one time and what's the point of activity I only really it's in our class but I only put 30 minutes on the movie Thai training if we do circuit training with a ball and ropes and shit that I put whatever the amount if it's 8 station to 32nd station you are heart rate monitor anything or no no no no I don't want to hear this and I don't want to hear I want to see you don't want to add that fucking ear infection I used to have to work out with your plugs on and I get high and go fill sidekick the Jesus you don't know what life is you had the ear infection in the ear plugs kept in equilibrium and balance that would keep sweat from going in my ear I don't know what life is when you working out you can hear your heartbeat but yeah but I'd that's trippy shit but Everlast has a ticker he's got an artificial valve and you put the microphone up to the chassis here

no I don't want to hear that shit long-ass time ago yeah yeah yeah but if I was cleaning of days I might as well go for it for at least a year old marijuana just make a comeback just to see what would it be like last year when we did sober October and it took a month off when I started back again I get nervous nervous scared to do it not go on stage I feel real strange and somebody once told me a great woman that if you think

getting high life is weird with you stop getting high and it's a different fucking adventure and she's screwing a lot of aspects I got home from The Comedy Store you know when you get home from the original on dog especially when you going to it was one of those nights when I went in there and I was Rocky by bought I just touch gloves and I measured and I just thought of going to the body the 15 minutes I remember driving up Laurel Canyon going to do it myself and I went on was like October 2nd it was 11:30 I started smoking reefer to calm down a little bit and I went down I started with sign of the Times by Prince and I just left on autoplay and it just took me into a prince fucking cave and I ended up on beautiful wives when he said sing it do you want him and I called you up on my way this is why I can't do sober October yeah because I got so high at night to come down off the stage you get off stage

you need something and since I don't drink I'm scared to come up that hill drinking I have to smoke reefer to come down at night and music that's the only thing that calms me down tonight to write at night after sets I write about what yeah I try to ride how lucky I am that I'm still performing at the store 55 I right about that I ate a bag of dicks but I'll get them tomorrow night whatever whatever just is flowing through my head while I have music on I'm drinking the water and I'm just I'll go on the back and fucking talk a fucking 22 hits off a pipe and I love listen to music at my dice my hobby it's a thing to like when you get out of the store it's a thing as sit yourself down and make yourself at work and right now cuz you like I'm done I did it got a good set in I'm good but that's the best time to write I think that everything is popping while go home and make Corrections maybe I said that fuck too early or maybe I said that I shouldn't have said it

but I know I won't try to run it and I'm gone at night like to try to unless something's really fine and I think my brain is shot at night cuz it is it because you did your did your stand-up get ramped up did the stand up play with the fucking kids you know get a podcast talk to people all day about shit that doesn't matter by night I like the guy like that

get up and play with mercy and talk to my wife I do a protein shake

I'll drop Marcy off I'll go home and then I go to the coffee shop and for 30 minutes I'll call my peeps and Jersey check in and then I'll get eggs at the coffee shop bacon once my breakfast is gone I write my Thought page down for the day. I take my iPad out and I either write a chapter in the book I try to write towards the book tomorrow I'm writing a book you read the book right now I'm trying I'm trying how long you been doing this

20 to 15 years you know but I forced myself and with the iPad you know there's a whole thing on this whole writing thing so I could just turn that chapter off and go to another document and click on to post Netflix material and then I got a thing that will working out of it makeup entirely so I think about that I'll go to that so now my actual great I think just doing that exercise everyday is good for me I don't need the right time with you everyday I'd rather just go down to the store throw some out there and fucking get excited and like I told you I'm not going anywhere else no more Los Angeles

I'm going back to the store especially after they shot the Netflix special and everything it all came to me after that that can you and especially after she died you know people like an acting class of Griefer to stanislavski and all this shit 10 years from now people going to be referring to the Mitzi Shore technique

there was something that every time I was talking to Duncan it by that talk to re about it I know she said something to us at one point that we were like wow something I don't know who's telling this on my bike gas but that was it she didn't like you doing that in the coal bin the man she needed to hide genius in a way like she was like Joe

you can let yourself on fire the original I don't give a fuck but you can't do that because you're killing my room just could not follow it like they can just not follow that one person right there a bit if it was about but it's terrible terrible version that that does no solid versions of that bit but that bit was right when that guy died J Howard Marshall and Anna Nicole Smith the douche it to him before he died too because she didn't like bits that were making fun of old people cuz you know her health was deteriorating to she's there was a couple of bits that she didn't like it

a picture of him he's a million years old and she's hot as the sun and she sit how is laugh and look at the smile on his face. I love that whole scene I loved what it was I loved it cuz it was so blatant you know it was just so blatant but she didn't like that but she didn't like the shoe have to have it either she didn't like that bad does it hurt when you have to told those really good she's given of Jesus Christ he's in a wheelchair when she's married I mean it was a damn classic doubt that that that scene of him and her getting married she's so young and so hot and he's so old wrecked and Rich As Fuck in a wheelchair it's such a classic scenario

it was so good you call there a Kentucky Fried hookah

Kentucky Fried right now would you like it if she want that money showed you and then he's calling father he's gone and he wakes out this like it's time to lick my

yeah man I just love the fact that that guy was that wealthy and yet still you that what was he doing more than a billion dollars he was a billionaire who was a oil magnate right wasn't he

I don't think she got the money though I think the kids fought her

100 million

that's peanuts

it got hot dog and Nicole Smith's daughter is now the fourth richest woman in the u.s.

is what is 37 billion now woman do you know out of the richest women the world Google the richest women in the world like where they got their money from

it's rough it's rough out there guys that they ain't fucking start businesses a dummies almost all of its divorce money

the whip feminists do not want to hear this but there was one woman who was the richest woman ever from a startup company Elizabeth what it was her name from the Rhinos was it what was her name Elizabeth something

not Smith what was it something homes Elizabeth Holmes she had a company called for a nose she started her self dropped out of college to start this company and it was a total fraud it was all fraudulent she's going to jail forever she was worth 34 billion dollars at one point it was a blood testing company and what it was is it just take a prick your blood instead of taking a bunch of your blood I getting your blood drawn that did her thing was like let's just be able to take a pic of the blood just a little tiny prickly can go to store your blood and they're going to be able to do a battery of tests on you and find out what's going on for almost didn't fucking work and they they falsified also it's a data and they lied to investors and all sorts of shit this lady she's to dress like Steve Jobs to our black turtleneck and everything and

I saw her speak once. Elizabeth Holmes indicted on fraud they got you with the fucking pop-up ad New York today or she is she going to jail

she's fucked but she was she was at one point in time the richest self-made person in the world richest self-made woman in the world she was worth billions of dollars the ship people do I watch it then the other down Crazy Eddie do you remember Crazy Eddie

crazy crazy crazy guy that had five boroughs in New York wholesale Outlets TGI real TVs and everything like that I saw I was watching MSNBC agreed to have a series called Green

I forgot the

pull up wit like justice. He liked it it out of the park then you go to Israel fucking your check back me unless he took the heaters nephew his son-in-law somebody that he was related through to blood put them through college so he can get a job at the IRS so they could figure out how to rob from the IRS

this is how fucking insane this guy was I'm watching this diet and how they got crazy yeah you know how you let me use the car you will be driving in New York and there was some guy selling stereo speakers and you take them home it was too bricks yet will he did the same thing to invest as he took boxes build them up with bricks and just stalked them in the warehouse and then he went public

so he got everybody to come down and look at all his inventory and all these fact-checked is that check the boxes with bricks of them all around the lake and he got all this money he fled the Israel and he fled for a while but they knew he was a pussy Hound right so they got like Escobar style they got me on the phone like I'm going to the store something crazy and what they did was they put a blonde on the side of the road with a mini skirt and they knew eventually he would drive by and stop

that's how they mail them what is the did you Google the way the richest woman in the world where they got their money from

crazy Annie's art is a bad mother fucker go Paramus

and he had commercials he was the first one that pushed the commercial barrier and him with a bunch of his hoes that would go did you hear with my man said this morning he had a bunch of those crazy Eddie had the best one he had Frankenstein Dracula and the wolf man peeing at the peeing at the men's the urinal cuz I came in like I remember I found out about Iron Man who's Howard Stern was talking shit about him and I was like who is this I'm a nice guy when I was asleep when I was like already I miss was

the fucking King of New York when I was eight nine I'mma still come on the morning and talk shit he was wearing like a turquoise one of those weird ties those bolo ties that like cowboys wearing at a fucking cowboy hat on and his whole studio was done like will like the West it was real weird they got weird cowboy boots and shoes are you a Rancher AM radio show from New York City that hosts

that said he called people Nappy Headed Hoes even before Stern I believe it just wasn't the same level Stearns outrageousness was Nationwide was really like an East Coast thing let people know about him in New York I never heard about him in New York or in Baltimore but I'd heard about Stern we all knew about Stern but nobody nobody really knew about it like it never made it there you know and then when I came to New York it was at the end like when stern was already The King and I must was to sort of like this guy that hated and I was like who is this I'm an idiot like who is this I'm a guy and they had a TV show for a while and then during the TV show it seemed the studio it was you no no disrespect but it was really fucking boring it was boring like they were there was no life to them like their opinions were that interesting was him

there's another guy there that looked like he was just waiting for you to go home and there was a woman that was with them whose it was due is no life in the room like you do watch The Stern Show there be a midget shooting bottle rockets are there assholes and pornstars riding dildos it was chaos plastic all over the grounds girls be squirting we just Madness like no one ever does not that that's good or bad but it was it was exciting like you're you're driving to work in the morning you're here and some girl freaking out cuz she's riding on some fucking that Sybian thing he'd make girls ride on

I like that was Madness so like that that like you would never heard anything like that on the radio before so then you would hear about I miss and I was our order daughter this morning or should I try to just be at the end it was just it was in comparison with soap it was dead it was like it was dry and I sent you the one time on Stern I mean it is so many great start already was so great it was the best body was talking to me if you listen to an old already when we had just gotten off the subway eat just shot heroin God knows where he had sunglasses on you know but man what are you going to do when a guy is like that you going to help him if you help the problem with people that have that fucked up is the only thing that ever helps them is the

the only thing it's like they have to hit rock bottom and then they have to decide they're going to they're going to do something about it but when you do get a lot of love for being fucked up that is kind of a problem because you you do start to think this is my thing my thing is being a fucked-up guy people love me when I'm fucked up this is what I do you know when you can fall into that, Belushi had the same problem the other guy got arrested so had the same problem this is neat you fall in time it is a pizza parlor when I was a kid his name was Nick the Greek fucking tremendous Pizza even though he was Greek like we let it slide he put the Sicilian by the window in the end it was what the Flies land on it it was like the airport for the Flyers they will and we will break his balls neck but I'm in my one another Quaalude one night fucked up to the gills to vomit all over my shirt and every time you see me call me fucking Belushi

that's one blue she almost died there was any good at 4 years he called me fucking Belushi and there's not a kid who had a beard they called me I told Uncle Manny like he had nicknames for us but that's a weird it bothered me after awhile you call me Bellucci I want Belushi died it really started bothering me I can my next you call me Bellucci to my face look what is fucking Belushi I was fucked up I wanted another Quaalude open up the red pepper threw it at him but I used to sell them jewelry like I would sound stolen Jemaine Nick with tight neck was the pizza parlor 50 yards in high school and you can run a tab with Nick and Nick used to I used to give Nick jewelry and he would look at me and you go speak how much you think that's worth good jewelry was 800 an ounce at that time gold

and I would bring him jewelry he would look at it and then take it give me money and put it in one of his pockets from his the day from the apron so two days laying down going down your neck when he was your bathroom like going there to stick my hand in April and take the jewelry back end of the week late I go back to Nick how much for the ring and he looked at me and he was racist as fuck I can either call me Bellucci ass pic to my face like a good man it was a kid you know this is on Kennedy Boulevard this is a big Boulevard and there was a kid that would come in then I'm still dear friends with that is family had money and he would go in there and buy a slice of pizza but he would cross the street because the ice tea across the street was a dime cheaper than one Ice-T came in those fucking cardboard no cardboard yeah but he would always cross the street so Nick will be having a conversation was like what's going on in Oswego West and we go he went across the street to get the ice cream he would fucking flip out here

run from behind the counter run onto County Boulevard hundreds of people be out there that you fucking Jew you fuck you fuck you was just cheap and shit like that that's it

and sent that you got to be pretty cheap to run across the street from us $0.45 for the ice tea but it actually it was $0.35 because the mother was losing the hat so every time you got a sandwich you A Little Piece of Heaven you know it's either get you when you get here you got me as high as you can get everything that little piece of hair in at the macaroni salad gave a fuck it was tremendous she made the best roast beef on rye in the world but every other in fact the whole family to her and her son will lose in the Hat and I learned from my son like his son is losing his hat but he couldn't control his emotions about it he went to everything show he did the fucking stitches he would spray paint his hair

he was one of those guys that hat like he tried but the head just kept falling out he had two male pattern whatever we were kids look up with the mom had it to the mom had everything in the house I don't know what it was until the guy that if your brother had it and fucking everything you got there had a little piece of hair on a dog's whatever you got to always have that if you didn't beat his ass what's up today

did you say to her face. We should torture all the time we love mrs. Harris losing his hair it's a devastating but a woman losing her hair weigh more devastating something about a woman woman women losing their hair it kills them really hot so sad so I've seen women lose their hair it's awful to get alopecia alopecia sweet like you lose your eyebrows and then people lose their eyebrows he looks like it sometimes she just starts falling off

I have this a singer at is a popular singer in the band that he's got alopecia and I just saw that they busted in my 30 years later you didn't know that was a wig View and then and I knew about him growing up but he would just lose his hat you know from time to time sometimes is the eyelashes that was everything that's fucked up you crazy I'm getting older like my hairline is receding bushy eyebrows eyebrows in some crazy eyebrows and I got to go home but I got it shop on eyebrow it's like a satellite I go home I'll ask my wife don't you see this shit your old guys like old Scottish guys or irish guys got it I got no hair on my legs I got minimal head on my shoulders I got no hair on my back I'm alone

I like to hear the hair twisting and my fucking head you know what that's like my eyebrows bro get bushy as fuck I got to bring scissors with me on the road to trim my neck and your in your mirror at home you don't see this shit that's do you get on the road with white in the hotel room out of my nose

did you find about the women with the Investments power blah blah blah corn Forbes world's 15 wealthiest people are men women only make up 10% of top 100 separate wealthiest women the world most of their money comes from their male relatives or husbands

are the top 10 wealthiest men made their fortunes themselves know who are the top 10 wealthiest woman that does not from divorce made woman on the list is why I don't know how to say this one's name is Zhou that's one word q u n f e i t who is born to a poor family of China dropped out of school at 16 she went on to found in the enormously successful technology company

but if you put mine back in the equation she's only 198th richest person in the world

no matter how you feel about the concept of two people hoarding enormous wealth the notion that women can only access money and power through their families or husband's Sims Medieval at Best Yet we see it occur at the very top of many professions outside of the business world

yeah some most people can you read the next stuff yeah recent high-profile examples Hillary Clinton during a presidential campaign the first female major party nomination campaign on a ticket of empowerment yet although she is accomplished in her own right she entered Politics as the wife of Bill Clinton and is undoubtedly benefited from his Prestige and connections that's true but she's also going to lose all your money I didn't leave you to read that that she was a lawyer and you know she was a senator now that's a weird thing cuz it there safe I'm not a big fan of Hillary Clinton but by saying she definitely entered because she was you know she was married to him but she was a lawyer I mean she's an accomplished person she's she's educated accomplish who's the senator I don't think that makes sense I hate when people say to feel like they don't want you at the right place at the right time but

I just jumped and you jumped you jumped bitch so that's the problem I'm not mad at nobody can't say she got into she may be a little helper pushy or call here but she jumped is a great book I'm reading right now it's called outliers by Malcolm McDowell it's fucking great and it's all about what makes people successful and why they were successful and there are a lot of factors man there's a lot of factors in when you were born like wet like a lot of it he goes on about hockey players about professional hockey player that almost all of them were born at a certain time so that they were at the end of the age cut off so I say if you know your between 10 and 11 when you go into what is that fifth grade

you are if you're one of the oldest kids you have a way better chance of being successful at hockey because your body is more mature than whether you're one of the youngest kids that goes in the sixth grade so with your fifth grader 6th grade like what year you were born is a big factor so the kids that were born later so that they're older rather the kids over there that are older when they enter into the 5th grade and 6th grade like across the board unanimously all the top-level professionals were all older kids in younger grades so that they're playing against smaller kids to get more time they said they're better so they get more coaching to get more hours playing there's a lot of factors is a lot of factors in like one of the things about Bill Gates the doors it's a good as a whole great chapter on Bill Gates and about when Bill Gates was young the the school and he went to had a computer class that allowed him to do coding

and then he got into the University of Washington they would let him get into their their computer room from 3 a.m. to 6 a.m. to head its open block so him and his friends would sneak into that place at 3 in the morning to all these all these different factors that lead to someone being like super successful it's a not just that you work hard and sometimes you get these weird advantages in life there's a bunch of things like for sure Hardware plays back if you don't do nothing he just sit around and and and woe is me and cry and and think the world fucked you're not going anywhere but the people that make it to the very top the Bill Gates and Steve Jobs they have a bunch of things going for them it's not just hard work it's also circumstance Fortune where they are what you know who's around them who who who encourages them this is a bunch and what time they were born and what you know what age they were when certain things happen to the world

two bunch of factors but for all those chicks just marrying right dude

divorced getting I know a lady who was just got

aid from a divorced and she's just shoot it in her face bag in 20 year olds now to larious she's in her late forties Baggett 20 year old dudes

how rough Mustang 4 speed it funny man to cut that check

for the guy yeah yeah I knew a guy who he cut a check for somewhere in the neighborhood of 50 million dollars

to Zach's already Grande a munchie

dirty Grandpa Monday so that was that was not beside the half-million up front but he just walked away I don't got his paying close to that and he hasn't even seen his wife he's been married to a new woman a different woman for 14 years

The Weezy at 14 years and he was only married to that lady for 12 and he still cut her checks and no kids he's got kids with a new woman the old woman no kids cut their fat checks tries to bring it to court try to reduce the amount of money she fight some tooth and nail you son of a bitch you left me he left her 14 pocket years ago man they were only together for 12 years it's like she doesn't want to work he is he fucked her so hard she can't work anymore

it's crazy if it was a man if the situation was reversed and a guy was dating a girl and they were dating for 12 years and she's like I'm tired of this I'm going to go fuc some new dude and the guy took her to court got money from her and then wanted money still 14 years later what kind of a fucking man would that be like get a job go do something with your life you are a human being you met another human being you spend some time with them they don't want to be with you anymore it's over like this is no there's no children with your lifestyle is a lifestyle that you were accustomed to maintain my lifestyle judge I like to buy nice purses I like to walk my little dog I like to put them in a little a little purse now in California is different factors also you have to be with that person for 10 years or something right this little practice by the way and they change depending upon the laws and they they change depending on how much money you making

my friend was pretty wealthy you did well but the guy who I know that they had to pay 50 million dollars he's real successful obviously that mean you got to make a lot of money to give your wife 50 million but he still had to give her 50 million I see the can I see the kid point I see that I see the child support point but I see a little bit of help is the list Madonna's divorce was Guy Ritchie estimated 76292 million he had she had to give him damn 76 million way to go by Richie I like to have them back in now I know how you buy those suits motherfucker now what's your name pays the singer from Bush

Michael Jordan's divorce Juanita Jordan 168 million

Mel Gibson's divorce in 2006 after 26 years 425 million wins divorce 2021 billion oh my goodness

oh my goodness Steve Wynn 1 billion Rupert Murdoch's divorced in 1990 and 1999 after 31 years of marriage 1.7 billion Neil Diamond 150 Harrison Ford 118 million give up the chatter Steven Spielberg a hundred million I remember that one that could that girl was an actress and she fucking vanished Kevin Costner Linda Hamilton 50 million Michael Douglas McCarthy that's the chick that was missing the leg right how the bells was mean she was nasty man

that's a lot of a mixed Jagger 15 million 25 million you got off light bro Mike Jack cuz member he fucking married in Jamaica and then it was like a Puerto Rican priest on his day off so he knew it going in because Mick Jagger ain't giving you dick we had this discussion first one he had to pay the second was like listen we're going to work around this way are you at he don't fuck around that guy he was before he was in the stones Jamie what's the school he went to be why don't make me say something wrong he went to the school of whales are some of the business he's all about the cheddar for the last 15 years he's just been pregnant women all over the country they cut number check and saying you know Egypt London School of economics

do you like no he didn't

like no he did not

UCF Joe Rogan do the same things do you ever see any of his do you follow him at all um yeah you see any of the videos that he doesn't him working on the afternoon to 72 years old like in the dancing still like Michael Jackson got that guy that is not fucking around now and I still remember one particular story when he got the balls they played the where the both of Buffalo was up with a college place and he walked in and he goes what's wrong with those seats and they were like one Mister Jagger that behind the stage bitch

you better get the salad cuz I ain't taking the stage until those motherfuckers are sold out so that the tickets behind the stage and Mick Jagger's brutal they can pay for my ass they can pay for my ass Mick Jagger's brutal bro he's brutal and that was back before they have those giant screens there's no dishes dishes 88 don't give a fuk didn't have those big LCDs we can see them like if you go see likes a Drake and he's at a theater in around and I can see his butt right that you're going to see his face on giant screens all around you you'll see it you know it if you you going to see like a real popular person and there's a lot of people playing in the round you know if Jack is an interesting guy I don't think he's like very tight watches Jesus tight you know if he's just like you have left though I mean he's like 76

me too

75 is a 75 how much time you got left if he if you are lucky everything goes great you got 25 years but those last 25 or rough

not with what he's got cuz he can just lay there all day have young girls massage who is Mick Jagger dog they can just blow on his little nut sack and sing fucking he's probably getting blood transfusions every day I know he takes good care of your look up he's the backbone of the organization and just to think that Keith Richards is still alive and kicking in this people out there doing CrossFit it didn't Keith Richards write a book where is kind of shity about Mick Jagger he just told what's Mick Jagger probably called and said do this to the truth full kit give me 10% and when that when I mean when I watch those little rehearsal tapes his fingers look at those fingers

what we're looking at a Keith Richards Richards fingers is every knuckle is swollen to the point it's like double the size he looks like he's got Megaton Dias his hands look at it like a Jiu-Jitsu guy you're seeing Megaton Dias and the girl who wrote the video but her dad Megaton Dias Jiu-Jitsu Legend all his life he's done the geeky guys who do the key all the time they develop real bad arthritis in their hands and their joints swell up like crazy see if you find Megaton Dias his hands that's not a good picture that's but there's there's some pictures of his is Knuckles there their they're crazy they're all fucked up and twisted like that is a little bit there they go zoom in on his name

her dad is a fucking Legend look go to zoom in on this and see how fucking flamed out those Knuckles are guys have done the game their whole life and they're always grab and hold on to the key to get that

yeah it's okay we get the point but that that's what Keith Richards fingers look like like he's secretly doing Jiu-Jitsu on the sly collection 40 Years of playing guitar easy that's good to apply in 40 years 50 years. He looks just as good as Mick Jagger he's doing blow everyday eating cockroaches smoked turkey looks as good as Mick Jagger you were just acting Mick Jagger looks fucking Sensational Jimmy look at them in the face Mick Jagger looks older it's hard to tell because Keith Richards of smiling we should go. Would love to see Mick Jagger still put 21 Euros out of the audience

I bet they feel so weird when he Fox them

I must feel so we're like you want to do if I was a girl I was 20 years old I would fuck Mick Jagger just to the story but when he climbs on top of you and you smell death just smell it coming out of my pores

he's not

Keisha's all he's a bad mother who sells his mouth misfiring sells all over the place and do more dancing like that for like that that's something that you have to end this is a new thing you have to do when they're sick how about somebody called me the other day and they like a man I'm thinking of doing something New Year's Eve downtown you know I hate New Year's Eve fat and I hate downtown

fucking Ozzy Osbourne to do in the for New Year's Eve for him but only for my fucking now in La I'm being darling Manson on walking just I'm sitting at going 70 years old please doing New Year's Eve

at the fucking

from got to

I probably got to wife probably tell them to go make that money make money do you use you at The Forum Joe connect his ankles together with rubber bands we can't make big steps are silly walks it's going to be a little true you just do so loudly you try to pull up Mickey on memo and Mickey made fucking Rocky real life together the same problem Rocky Heidi did you watch it but yeah I told you I called you and said watch it

for years I don't know I don't know I don't know how I felt about Sylvester Stallone I'm a fan I just didn't then I went to your house that time and your wife was goofing on you and she's like I think he's got he's in love with Sylvester Stallone Marion, I feel like he was 65 playing as soon as you watch this Creed and drop I had tears in my eyes because I'm like this guy has got no respect for years and you look at them now people goofed out of this shit dog he wrote two or three

wow I didn't know he had his whole back done that's crazy like this guy wrote a fucking two or three franchises

not this guy started like when you did that I had some things about facts about a guy like he was fucking bro he had to sell his dog he had to do all this shit Rocky look at this guy jacked 71 jacked

fucking jacked

when I saw that commercial for the first time with green how's it going I'm not watching this shit and then AMC lately every Sunday or something they throw Rocky on and you say what the fuck I got 10 minutes before World News Tonight and you start watching it and you see the Brilliance of what this man has done yeah it's really it's just completely whether it's cheesy with Dre when he gets beat up and Apollo Creed takes into the ghetto and Mason looking brothers and that kid by the way is a badass motherfuker Michael Johnson you look at it you like like me and you at the store behind it like you would say to me really Jody is he's going to fight the Russian son I could have wrote that idea on a fucking

it's still huge it's still coming out Thanksgiving Day this guy is coming giant it's going to be huge changes that franchise started in the 70s

70s he made Rocky 1 in the 70s I remember I watched it when I was a little kid I drink raw eggs and I ran around the block

like I just listened to a David Goggins bucking motivational speech about this when they first started shooting this he told him to hit him for real and you put him in ICU for 9 days Dolph Lundgren

you should try to knock them out

why what why would he do that I don't know how much longer it was a legit kilkishen karate champion. Dolph Lundgren's up bad motherfuker like legitimate bad motherfuker like you know I mean he did a bunch of those crazy action movies and played The Punisher and also but that guy is it was a legit karate champion he's a bad mother fucker top longer than I would not want that guy hit and then what's this what's this one called London put me in the hospital during Rocky 4 Antonio Tarver knocks Sylvester Stallone out when it when he was doing that movie where he was still boxing member I just a few years ago he was in his fucking 60s and he was boxing in one of those movies a funny Antonio Tarver Magic Man tarvos heavyweight champion light heavyweight champion knocked out Roy Jones jr. member when he stood stood in front of Roy Jones Roy Jones good excuses and then he knocked them out

Antonio Tarver is a bad motherfuker and apparently when they were doing scenes in the movie he clipped him and NK Odom

story said yeah for the first 45 seconds to try to really not come out hit him so hard his chest started to start his heart started this well as blood pressure went up had to go back on an emergency jet to America use a nice you for 5 days Lowe

and the insurance company would not stay out for 5 days with nuns walking around

Assurance company will not pay out after saw the footage of the incident once they did they wrote the check he hit my heart so hard at band against my ribs are starting to swell that usually happens in the car accidents assaulted by a truck that is ridiculous he went solo and also talks about why you hated Lundgren from the get-go their friends now probably cuz the big handsome fella from fucking Norway or where the hell is from where you from Dolph Lundgren with that name

it's from some yeah he's like got this and cousin he's a Galveston Scott this is the karate champion yeah I think he was a national champion locations no joke man those those those fucking guy that's a hard style very hard Styles gsbl so it's not GSP Stylo so I'm pretty sure

Palm Bay really hard hidden motherfukers it's a very hard to buy a lot of wheel kicks what they do in the tournament still cash in tournaments a punch to the body full blast butt kicked to the legs that had the body and its stand right in front of each other and beat the fuck out of each other it's horrific it's like, the opposite of Taekwondo was a lot of kicks and punches only to the body to but Joe Cashin they they threw leg kicks in there and it was a lot of footwork with most of those guys muscles guys like stood in front of each other and battery charger but a lot of cute Asian guys went on to be really successful in kickboxing in fact a lot of a lot of the Holland influence and kickboxing came from killed should background like they started out with kilkishen and kickboxing and then they learn Thai Thai techniques as well

but a lot of those guys had an influence of action karate very big in Europe it's crazy when I first started martial arts the big thing was a sweep sweep the leg early 70s everybody swept you fake to High cakes and even if it was a spinning back kick your the third one was a sweep and that mother fucker was gone I used to go to all those karate tournaments now is my shit I throw to hike spinning back kick sorry I didn't want them to hit sweep cilajet nobody sweeps anymore no be sweet but not as much as I expect you to sleep with a good fucking leg if you set them up a good old-fashioned sweep I mean what's his name has that little sweep the leg push-back you know your boy hit Jon Jones know the other guy

from the fighters position to just come into you with a sweep and throw your legs after Monday it takes a bunch of fakes on here with him it's basically off I buy and sell the elbow coming around your leg comes around and sleeps that guy off his feet when he lands on his back and you would like what your laugh is still some some guys that are really good at sweeps the thing about MMA it's just there's so many different things going on you know but in Muay Thai sweeps are huge and more time it's a big part of the sport you know that's why I don't like the fact that let it get so high level and Muay Thai and now he's getting the MMA he's fucking guys up not just with sweeps spinning elbow is also it's a shit that did his his level of Muay Thai like what time stop moving to listen to Kenny Florian one time he goes that you know Muay Thai even has a couple aspects from Jujitsu when I guess not you're just too but something else

there's a lot of guys develop really strong core Xanax each other by the back of the neck and they're moving and sweeping each other all the time there's so much involved in in a framing with your forearms and sweeping the legs out and twisting and and changing angles it's a great when when you learn the other aspects of wrestling when you learn takedowns and control and then when you learn Jujitsu and I was of it like having that background from the cleanse from my tie is so gigantic because so many different things open up from their elbows open up from their knees the body open up from there you wrestling High School G I wrestled one year in high school why don't you rest well for how to figure out what what was more you know what was more important to me I couldn't do both was just too exhausted like that you know he used to have that

the weight room down to like a hundred ninety that was doing half of yoga before or after yoga was invented that room stunk and it was hotter than girls like what is covering these pipes no one's checked these pipes and when I don't want cancer what's happening in this wrestling schools in kindergarten all the water have lead if it didn't have lied to like what I went to the park yesterday my daughter and there was a lady next to me and she asked where I was from and she was her father was from Brooklyn we started talking to a beautiful two-year-old

22 year old got caught on one of the monkey bars in the fall I had to go over and help her in it and she goes I remember going up to my father's neighbor to seeing his play yard they were nothing like these and I don't remember coming from Cuba and doing that in on monkey bars but then you get so good that you put your legs up and you hang by your knees and one day brought in hanging right and I landed on that concrete there was no rubber in those days it was just straight-up concrete half the first grade I fucking torched eye twitch that the first grade I landed right on my fucking neck I never got on the monkey bars how far is break a lot of kids oh fuck around with monkey bars at all done I broke my arm in a monkey bar my daughter broke her arm in a monkey bar another kid in my daughter's class broke her arm in a monkey body but don't fall down try to catch yourself put post your arm snap

yeah yeah those real common monkey bars are fucking dangerous because you don't have the hand strike that you're 6 years old so you grab ahold of bars and your swing and he just don't really have the dexterity and it slips and fall back and you post and snap you got to see my daughter on that monkey bar she gets it she does it until I end bleed dog blisters a mother's going to put a bandaid on. It's Fierce then she's not allowed yeah I like that about it I put a lot of time into that shit I've you know it's really weird because of the kavalan situation and the Harvey Weinstein situation you're a dad I'm a dad it's different and how you got to raise your daughter now this is affected man or what the capital of thing was pissing me off for a few weeks because I don't like the idea that they could come back to you for something you didn't high school that that's just not right in my world unless I

talk to you in the ass in high school and covers your mouth I didn't do not need him saying he did do the show me know so I know for a fact I've known you for 20 and I've seen you sweeten up over the years we all change your not the same Joe Rogan I met 20 years ago I'm definitely not the same guy was in high school. I'm sure he was he was a guy that was hanging around with a bunch of drunk jocks and we all remember drunk Joe has that that's sort of in the environment of like being around a bunch of drunk guys or consulate one-upping each other that's a that's a sketchy fucking environment that's the thing scared me that's what I thought that you know those guys that rich boy kids doing you know what happens when a little bit of money everything's been covered up all their lives everything is been coming up all their lives you know when I was a kid I knew this girl

place a call to Mindy had and on Friday nights at get in the car and they drive it for like fucking Connecticut and tells you to suck all their dicks to get home got in those that poor girl is today for myself is 1993 getting coconut building in Harlem and she's a you going to save me I'm with some guy in the car he doesn't want to leave me alone I might listen bitch I'm walking to my car that I saw you before my life

I swear to God yeah something to her in a cop house on 181st Street Ten Years After High School I'm in a fucking 4th floor with some Dominicans I'm walking down the stairs and it's Mindy head and she's like what are you doing here the same thing you're fucking doing it obviously for some people their experiences in high school to find them you know I just watch that Stephen King movie It the most most recent one with the clown but one of the things that I was thinking when I was watching it was like how fucking mean kids are in school to each other I got that you kind of forget about that and then you watch one of those movies about people being mean to people you like oh yeah I remember going around to get away from a guy that was picking on me it was fuck with me and like you would be scared to run into him at the bus stop and scared to see him after school and that's how I got in the martial arts in the first place

guitar being scared scared of people's martial arts and I was still fucking skid plate a bunch of clowns got together and went on strike they went downtown and they had a parade like I'm not a parade what do you call when people get together and and they fucking have signs this is right after that movie was released a month later 2 months later a bunch of clowns in the in the California area got together downtown and picking it Stephen King because they were losing work is clown Town cries because they lost a bunch of clowns got cancelled they lost all their clown season work or some shit I read the book a long time which one it I remember. I was like man how they going to make a movie out of this they made a movie out of it way back in the day with John Boy from the Waltons I'm going to do with the mole on his face

I watch the other night on TV just flipping through the channels it was on and it was after couple days after I had seen the the most recent version of it was hilariously bad it was so stupid but it was John Boy with the Waltons in might have been

how many versions of that it movie did they make

was just too

the first one was the first one with Tim the guy from The Rocky Horror Picture Show double that was who the the clown was so stupid

wasn't scary at all I mean that not even remotely but the new one was pretty fucking scary crazy mother fucker we both right on writing you see my son Zion again he went there they contact me like we want you to be outside of the galaxies are the only way I'll be honest if I could ride my motorcycle to go back and forth like we don't need you but I just tell you if I go on Sons of Anarchy I got to ride my motorcycle so we play the creepy guy that makes you disappear after they kill you really like you comes in and measures you like you're on the floor dead and he walked in measure you and tell you what he needs I need a rope I need some gasoline I need to quit because I also need a selection of 70s classic rock

and then you disappear when you come back there's nothing there and they walk him out he tells you what you want how much 800 you paying the 800 if you only have 6 here look around the room just take like a statue just walk out of your house

you know what that the crazy thing about him was his battle coming back from getting hit by that guy in a car he was walking I think was in Maine right it was walking and some guy wasn't paying attention and fucking hit him in his car just destroyed his body like just destroyed his body like me and he was fucked up for a long motorcycle cycle shattered his no no he was walking he was just walking and we got hit by a guy in a van so glad I read that I think you turn me on to it when I read that chapter on Carrie how he had written half a carry and threw it away and his wife found it again him finish it and it was about a girl with a period of something crazy and how I like I was in shock right book Carrie is a great book Kyrie and Cujo my favorite Stephen King books Cujo till this day I have it I look at it and I respect the psychopath

this is why I don't even open that book I just look at it and touch it from time to time when I go I don't know if I want to get into that thing and it was a great book that they do like the movie version of it was Pet Sematary Pet Sematary is a book and some things about books you know I hate that cliche the books are better or the books better but what is interesting about books is there certain things that you shouldn't really see you should only imagine like they were they work out better in them in your in your imagination like you're something much creepier about them in your imagination and Pet Sematary

like whenever I have a hard time sleeping or something like that something is going on with me so instead of sitting in bed and having what's called insomnia I get up and I write it up when you read that back it's like when I write about something I did as a kid whether it's Robin Freddy at Putnam fuel when I was a kid I used to Rob this gas station every 8 weeks and he don't like that when I was in West Palm Beach for kids showed up for my school

when I was in West Palm Beach niggars I will have something and he goes this is a map you drew of us worry about the Robert gas station in 1981 he still had the map of me would stick man we would ride this we was robbed this gas station every 6 to 8 weeks coming from the left I'll come in from the north I don't even know what the fuck I forgot it somewhere right about things that you did that were leaving when I write about that you read them it's different type of fuck you reading is fucking phenomenal imagination that's why when you read Silence of the Lambs and you watch the movie you got to get all everybody in that room and give him a big hug because they kept it honest they kept it real when you read William blakely's The Exorcist and then The Exorcist been on for the last 2 weeks on AMC and I've been watching bits and pieces of it and I can't afford it more

really yes it was Jason Jason whatever his father in Sleepers with with with Brad Pitt De Niro he played the newspaper reporter that's his fucking father but Damien Karras plays the priest that's Jackie Gleason son-in-law you marry Jackie Gleason's daughter and it was funny because last week I was in my office typing my wife called she was going to be home in 20 minutes at the baby so I don't know what you doing I got a ride so I wanted to living room and I turn the TV on just to be out there cuz I know she going on watch cartoons or whatever and I saw the exorcisms not like turned it on and dog it came on when the priest comes to the door

which if I have a bump inside director I will take this dick out and suck it because that's a real directing is he scared you without showing you anything on the priest comes to the door all you see is an image from the fries and you don't see what his face looks like and it scares you but when he walks in he takes this motherfucker and the guy system can I get you something I was your trip can I get you something and he goes do you want some coffee there's no let's do this and this guy is a psychiatrist you have to watch it again this guy Josiah priest at least I just dropped in Psycho and the priest looks on those knock it off the devil is coming he attack your psychological like nobody else do not listen to him and he just breaks it down and then the guy says to him do you want to know the three levels of manifestation

and he looks at me those know there's only one Satanist Saint dog it just right there you like so my daughter walks in the five-year-old walks in and she sits on my lap and she's a Bible beater I don't know if you know this that Mercy the Bible beater she loves anything with God and here I got a little fucking things you gave me was Jesus a fish yet where's your my daughter's Bible Beat It even though she goes to fucking public school should come home and come in and talk about God today so she's watching this whole manifestation of these two priests talking about God is powerful God's going to kill Satan other. The dock at all of a sudden they walk into the room and she's sitting up and she's like a daughter caught it took like 30 seconds to just look at me and she just ran out of the room like she doesn't know who Satan is nothing

she just ran out of the room this is one of the scariest movies one of the finest movies she Elevate yourself comes down what about when they so they do the first thing they walk out and what about when they walk back in and he's a he's a doctor so he's checking the heart and she turns into the mother in the hospital and start saying being me why you do this to me and and the priest told him don't listen to him that the Devils coming you know it off and what about when he comes and goes father how about spending time with the boy watch it while all this is going on you have to remember that there's a murder going on because the first night when she came down before the devil came in some guy was fucking shit I was talking shit a Jewish guy was talking shit about him out there something that she comes down and pees and says you're going to die motherfucker

what is the second I up there to an astronaut wasn't it wasn't an astronaut he was something downstairs and she say something like that you're going to die up there no no I was downstairs I didn't she said she was talking to a guy was an astronaut she said you can do it you're going to push you just said you're going to die and then she peed the carpet and then it was a dinner party and then a couple nights later they found the guy on the bottom of the stairs but it couldn't have been a girl because they twisted his neck all the way around so I had to be a man and that's why you have to watch that movie when the cop comes to talk to the mother of famous actress

last time I wash it was like 5 or 6 years ago its first one is a deep dark movie

that girl got fucked up doing that movie you know how can I make a 12 year old girl stick across my pussy is so sucks cocks in hell does she told Olympics in the movie theater

like if I could sue the Union City cinema today I would sue the businesses that give a fuck they took my $2 and let me see that threw me to the fucking world but I also what name again Linda Blair and she showed up 20 years later she started hanging out with Rick James in the blast doing today but I hope they pay the lot of money because she never really recovered from that she never really worked after that it's tough to get work after you put a cross in your pussy

it's tough to get a commercial for fucking yeah well it's also people never forget you were that person like it's very difficult for people to have a change percent when she walks down the stairs backwards head spins around in front of the priest it's just too out there for a movie they could never take think every making that every once in awhile and they look at it

Jesus Christ

that was a creepy fucking movie and you got to realize that back then there was nothing like this before this movie this movie was so extreme but there have been horror movies before but it was like Frankenstein or Dracula they were kind of scary but the worm bloody do it was nothing like this movie this movie was so over-the-top and people lot of people at the time or like this the movie represented something and representative changing of boundaries that people these young kids these people today I what the fuck are they doing what kind of movies do they make out to go to a fist fight over being her mother being in Catholic school and that would just piss Tara Thomas not to go see it we weren't allowed to go see it I was right there when the movie got released and I had to say it and it's in it and it is until you can't see it

weather everybody was on their feet yelling for Rocky this is what America was different everybody was young Rocky and I also saw The Longest Yard Daddy original and are the movie theater that was basically Irish Italian and Cuban but they that they talked that yelled at the screen you know they threw things at the screen and window good fucking Longest Yard with Burt Reynolds is coming back the whole place is on their feet this is a great movie theater and they let you in and then they play the last movie at 11:30 I saw you want me times as long as the dragon in that the late movie my mother let me walk up there cuz I'm 48th Street and my mother's bar was on 29th Street and she could go and I saw everything that Fist of Fury The Outlaw Josey Wales

all those fucking movies I saw that I didn't they play it I just go there as a Spanish kid watch and learn the language and loved it special effects and so because of that you had to accomplish much more with even with American Werewolf in London right original

I want to see a 81

Palmetto gas

look at what year was it was it 81 the special effects even though they were groundbreaking for the time like when he's lying on the floor and his body stretching as I return it to the wolf like that shit when its face is stretching out I mean those are groundbreaking special effects like no no one has ever seen anything like that side enjoyed enjoyed its watching a movie now and 30% of the 40% of the Seas no no no that was the girl that the vampire and the Lycans versus vampires

what's wrong with the movie when she got caught with heroin with Claire Danes at the jail in Thailand Kate Beckinsale something they both fell in love with the same guy and they put heroin on them and they put them in a prison so I was flipping through the channels while I was Brokedown Palace it is when I was doing that I'm doing this fucking fitness channel for this fitness challenge with arry and Bert and Tom and I just watching anything I can on TV while I'm on the elliptical machine or the row or whatever the fuck I'm doing and I was watching one of the Underworld movies and I realize there's like 10 of them I mean how many fucking underwear World movies has there been number to the main star they're so stupid that I saw I mean it was like deep and she has a daughter now and there's five of them I don't know which one I

but I think I saw the first two I think the one I was watching it was so dumb but anyway of the CGI the werewolves are so corny they show you too much it looks fake and the thing about An American Werewolf in London is they showed you a little quick Snippets of the thing before would kill people it was just enough ugly that they look so stupid

it just looks fake like CGI just does not look in those some of the Pat McGee the guy who made that the werewolf out there in the lobby that's what he had told me he's like when you see your your brain can tell that's not real but even if it looks really good your brain can tell it's not real he's like what your brain looks of your brain sees special effects like makeup like that kind of stuff like it's like a face that's been done with like Prosthetics and teeth and fangs your brain says oh that's a real thing that's a thing that's right in front of you yeah these worlds are so corny

who won the run and looks fake their Shadows look fake but poop scene from American Werewolf in London like like the actual werewolf they did they had very very quick since you didn't see much of the werewolf it was like very fast like you said running through the Streets of London to see its snapping at things like an that one that's in the beginning when they first got jacked by the cheese

yeah like this

give me some volume

so they're running

check didn't see much

what is a prion Jimmy Joe Rogan you said best couple minutes ago that the thing that pisses me off the most is in today's the whole movie business I grew up on the movies how mother fucking immigrant Can't Hide Love movies the more they have Tony Montana in the fucking detention things I do know how to speak Spanish English as I watch the movie set for these Cubans anybody Felipe Esparza told me that the problem that happened somewhere between 85 maybe 87 and today is the disconnect

of the director and you're asking me Joey what's the disconnected the director the imagination

I just watch something on Scarface I almost called you cuz it was so interesting about the dilemmas they had was Scarface when they gave an X rating

tried Scarface came out Pacino said that the release at the party is Scarface he just sank people with getting up and leaving 20 at a bunch they took Joan Collins aside and they said the Jones Collins what did you think of the movie she goes I left after she goes I think a hundred bucks is enough Fox for a person's lifetime like they was so but they showed that's enough of purses like that I left after I have they counted how many fucks he said and all this stuff but that's not my point the point is that when they

the guy that directed had to go in front of a board

it's a big difference about me showing

chainsaw going through your phone and then you sing it and then seeing your face and you bleed you follow me right that's why they had to go to that that was better. Yes you know that the X rating you know when that day that's a beautiful story this is supposed to be me you and him and he supposed to make the decision the director brought Vineland specialist psychiatrist but he brought back to prove his point to take it from an x-rated movie to an R-rated movie when you watch Once Upon a Time in the West Sergio Leone was the king of the directors because he gave you the decision to decide

are you with me he gave it to you when Charles Bronson gets off the train in the beginning of Once Upon a Time in America and there's three dudes waiting in the train goes by I don't sweat it stops and also you here on harmonica and you hit Charles Bronson going they look up and they see Charles Bronson but they're not focusing on Charles Bronson Sergio Leone's fucking with you he keeps showing you this fucking thing that keeps going like take me back where do you want this gun fight he gave you imagination directors gave you imagination they gave you a split second to decide whether what was going to happen now I know the story before it happens

the director was something special that's why Sergio Leone those guys going to Spaghetti Westerns with genius because they gave you the are you with me you gave me a second to split the side that you had to think about you going on I didn't I don't that scene I could have put it in his arm or showed Pacino's face remember High Plains Drifter tremendous always a ghost and painted the wrong name on high plains was it. I don't know if it's Hang Em High

which one we has the shield underneath and he knows they only shoot for the heart

and I keep shooting out of me falls down and they shoot a dummy falls down it should tell him he falls down remember Jamie put Google Clint Eastwood comes back I just scription yeah Revenge thing about that movie is like you don't realize it's like they don't spell it out for the dummies that he's a ghost like you have to figure it out at the end of the movie if I remember correctly it's been a long time since I saw it but at the end of the end of the film they serve laid out in the beginning the beginning they show I might be wrong here I feel like in the beginning of the movie is them beating him and killing him the whip him the end of the movie you kind of realize it's him coming back towards the end of the movie but it's not like specifically spelled out like it was a curse and he came back to haunt this town and kill everyone

it wasn't that cornball so if you go back to like the older movies you go back to like you know like a Frankenstein or Dracula type film they spelled things out like they treated you like you were a dumbass and they spelled things out and they eventually stop doing that and they put mystery and Imagination and films and then somewhere along the line at least would like modern Blockbusters if I had to guess I would say part of the problem is there's so much money involved in these movies if you're going to make a film and you know it's some gigantic thing with special effects and the studio is dumping hundreds of millions of dollars into it they want to return their money

I saw a people discussing I think Johnny Depp was just kind of kicked off as in the right word but he's not going to be the next Pirates movie I guess they're discussing under the comment section like it was the word last one was the worst one of the of the lot 330 million dollars on the budget but it made 800 million they're like that's a fail failure well Johnny's off the rails right now 35 lb shaved his head is falling out of his jeans whenever you get like two tattoos of a woman the only been married to for like 6 months these are all bad signs

rough town to live Eagles a motherfuker people blowing smoke up your ass as a mother fucker sure I mean this guy is spending half a million dollars a month of wines yeah you know I don't know exactly don't quote me on that but I know that the one they're kinda ugly these pictures of him now

stay humble or be humbled he's wearing a shirt dude you're 55 years old why the fuck would you wear that shirt but these ladies like fucking inspirational quotes you expect to see on some strippers Instagram page you're not supposed to be wearing those where Johnny Depp okay this is outrageous Johnny Depp last movie he did mucho mucho love you say it but it's on child right and I put it out is he the I forget them that's a good book or whatever I forgot I have it at the house he plays the cop and I heard that there was a lot of little that was in the workout that's it

one time when he had done that's that movie Dead Man to remember dead man interesting movie it was a weird black and white movie about a guy was riding a fucking train across the West he was talking in the interview about it he wants to do interesting projects He was all I'll never be Blockbuster boy then he became Blockbuster boy but he don't give a fuck what anybody says I love I love you and movies but you know he's boys would stand up essentially Johnny Depp motherfukers with their everybody thinks you're going to spend money on their website guess what we're not we're not paying to read your fucking website we're not

Johnny Depp was in Biggie Tupac movie of broccoli pulled from release Forest Whitaker

don't pull it if it's awesome but the point is you know stanhope's poison them and he's like he said that once he did those pirates movies he couldn't go anywhere it was over you can't go to restaurants you can't go anywhere I just can't go anywhere he he hit that upper echelon of Fame worth almost there's no turning back when you know you get like Michael Jackson type frame you just get crazy your world is just it's no one can relate to you what were they given them from movie the movie with back end of everything I bet he was making more than that right yeah that's he's got like 18 hours is a boat that says a ranch what about what I have said for the guy that owned TGIF Fridays he was on board of directors

yeah when I lived on 4435 Faraway Road in Snowmass Village Colorado I have set and the guy the two years I was there he came a week and he came for 3 days and his daughters came for 3 days they spent $2,000 on booze they all got drunk and they left two days later and I was talking to the door and she's like yeah this is my dad's got houses all over the place he had three in Colorado long like cross to Crested Butte Snowmass Village and he had the house on the other side to ski over there because he like two different types of Bout It

yes Jesus Christ yeah I know that's that's at world when people get that famous when they get that rich when they get that diploma to live in some sort of weird LOL and he had a brand new Jeep delivered

every year

and part of my agreement was I had a driver like 50 miles a month to keep make sure because when he came to town he didn't want no problems with none of his houses right so he had a different fucking house sitter it every and if you know any of the background check on you know I listen to me I fucking grandfathered into the house because my buddy from Jersey had it and his girlfriend came out there is a knocked her up but the guy was difficult to get a hold of cuz he was in England and whatnot so my friend just said to me just didn't move and don't say dick and when he comes in he will see it's you and tell him I had to leave the shit keep my deposit

so I stayed there for like 2 months and he came he's like what the fuck are you and I told him what happened and that we couldn't get ahold of him cuz he was in England and he asked me for a couple names I had already lived in Snowmass for about a year I left him and came back so I had a couple nice references for me gave me the thing in the left and I was not allowed in his home

Kubota dealers I had an apartment over the garage I can use his car and it was 18 hours a month to be the shoveling snow or 18 18 hours a month of work or so it was essentially shovel the snow in the winter and mowing the lawn in the summer he would give me a little of Simons I paint the wall or whatever I would do keep the trim up and ship it was Zero rent I think he paid me a hundred a month

and I got to get a day job and Ski and shit like that don't levitate was a phone to a fireman your volunteer fireman because all right so cocaine was 18th at the time in Snowmass at my buddy said give it to me for $800 in Jersey so I would go back and forth I was making all this Dawn the people found out the guy that they blew up they they they put a pipe bomb in this guy's car and they bloom up his name is Steven grabow he left a big gap in this fucking drug place so I was telling you oh yeah they killed in Colorado and Aspen 36 days before he was to stand trial they could never get them for cocaine use making 6 million every 6 weeks I spoke about this every 6 weeks in 1984 they arrested him the first time in 83 they brought them to Denver they found 9 million altogether cash

dad and 84 was when

he went pee every night and work out it was a good-looking dude that kept in shape in 20 different cars and every night he give the guy at the door $5 to start the car that night the guy took the night off he started his own car and put a pipe bomb in his car and blow him up he made it all the way to the hospital but something went so deep up his ass but it just bled the vets

so love this Gap so this guy approached him and then he's like man these people mad at you

then we do business with you you cut in the mouth so I had to talk to them and they said listen for you to buy weed and we never do a face to face

so they have an aspen club and they have a place called to see if the Aspen Club is full you know in those days these places were thousand a month to walk in and I knew a girl that used to go to the Aspen club and she should tell me she's fake showers right next to Barbie back I'm a Barbie back and got a beautiful Bush she would tell me every night but he's got a beautiful fucking Bush it's perfect so is the Aspen Club me to Snowmass Club Snowmass Club has golfing and I'm kind of nose around the thing it was like 900 a month to be a member it couldn't have been a member so the only way I could become a member with my being a volunteer fireman the Navy give you admission in so if a 90 days out of train it'll go up two flights thing elad up Carrier Road but basically it was put night when two words come they don't know how to fucking turn on the fireplace so they clean out the jars and they put them in and then these people would put them in the dumpster so tell her I'm and all you're doing is dumb

that's all you doing but you got access to the Snowmass Club

so basically I lose walking to the Snowmass Club to give the girl the $10,000 but I need gym clothes workout in for the time you got back to your lock of the couple in the locker

it was all in they were all in everybody's involved everybody was so the girl that worked at that she was getting a piece and then later on I go in the lock-up of the coke would be that get like a half of 8 ounces you know I was no deal and I take it home but then I started getting coked up every time there was a fire I went like two flies both dumpsters and is a 16 idiots with a fire hose I might have this necessary they even gave me like a little fire truck like a little Toyota truck would like a bell on it to go to the fires at like 235 stop showing up for 2 months they get where are you is there on the base where are you let's go get my dick sucked you want me to go put out a fire in a dumpster go fuck yourself they came over and then I went to work with this other dude dick there was three dicks

who is Dick South and Dick doing wisdom and so I had a buddy you single you're surrounded by dick dick dick dick so Dick Kelly had one of those snow companies and they wanted me to go in now I don't know what they called Joe Rogan so straighten me out it's a high low that shovel snow

what's a high low on the morning for the morning I'm on my second Grandma block he'd be in front of my house beeping fine by himself about working tonight I was on a roll of God that was that you aren't getting any sleep there was a bunch of guys that I knew Colorado on South Boston Boston yeah that's that's that's a business with a coffee making sure you're out there

with the truck out of the driveway pushing snow around my buddy Jimmy he had that was one of his side businesses he was an electrician side bed and see how to hit a plow on his pickup truck I would just fucking plow people out do people's driveways you know it's I was I went home this year March 20th I went home to Jersey how to do a show one night or not

and mean are you hooked up and send you a letter but we walked around the city and the snow I just started to snow you know and I'm by the time I got up the next morning it's snowing like a foot I never seen anything like that like when I was a kid New Jersey if it snowed that shit was there like I should stay to stay that there was no school stacked up on the side of the road I won't let a fucking an ounce of snow land not an inch really that fucking tremendous that night the roads would clean the East color I'll never forget how when I left Jersey in 83

like if it's snowing like let's say if it snowed and I got to take the bus up here I would just call you and say Joe it's snowing you to expect me at 11

and you know everything was late whenever it snowed in Jersey is his big metropolitan area in New York City and its snow did cripple us any they didn't know how to handle it newspapers wouldn't come people get pissed off and New York Post Alabama moving to Snowmass and got the job at Aspen electric and that meant I had to get on the bus and Snowmass go to the bottom of the hill transfer and shoot the bus to Snowmass I did this not him the first time we got I woke up one day and Colorado you wake up one more this 12in is just another day just for the day I'm in 1983 they couldn't fucking clean up New York but I'll never forget that morning waking up at Aspen like at 6:30 and Snowmass and going then I can expect wait till about 10 and I walked in there at 10 people like what the fuck have you been

I might get snowed out the bus is running late to go everything else he came on the bus and they all got here on time they fucking busted me right out like Colorado is that far ahead of the game or they just so used to it it was so but like it here I was living in this big Metropolitan City that 4in crippled

Bates Road on something yes they throw it on something because when you wash your car in Colorado they push to do the underwater carrots to the prevention because rust rust travels fast in Colorado and Boston to that salt salted butter soap buy old cars and in the fenders on the back of the fenders like at the corner that's where the salt pile up he always have rust there it always have like this big pockets of rustic corner of place at Food Lion on Roxboro California car you're buying a muscle car like an older you know hot rod you find a rust-free California car oil California Avenue Salt big thing with salt destroy cars destroy the frame destroy everything assault get up in there just sit there and just rot away the metal got to take the metal buffer. Would like to add you. And then you would have to spray Rust-Oleum on it and then you have to cuz I

see the guys in Colorado are they would fix the cars and it would take like a missing bumper College strategically welded in and then you bump that and you colored your but you can't put primer on it and that's how they got there the rest of the Gods in Colorado East Coast cars had a tremendous amount of body work if you wanted a constant job fixing cars body work was always good not just cuz accidents but also just cuz of rust work now is the rest of product of the humidity also on the east coast of Colorado price a little bit of rust from the yeah Colorado you getting it from the moisture you getting it from Salt I'm sure if they salt the roads please cuz you're definitely getting you know the variety of factors that cause car to rust out older cars but if you can find an old rust-free car and that is like that's what everybody wants and I find a 1968 Camaro

rust free like you know about Corvettes they didn't trust their made out of fiberglass to get an old Corvette most of the body's were pretty good if it wasn't cracked wasn't damaged is it in Rust

I'm going to cut myself on one of those fiberglass Corvettes one time my leg is on my Ram past them is broken this in the 70s write a 65 Corvette that thing's fiberglass

why did they put fiberglass in to make it lighter because they can make cool shapes have you look at a 1965 Corvette that shape every look at it and I think I have an idea how it looks like it looks like a Sportster that's the one they are and if you had to do that all by banging out metal and there's mine but look at ifucking humps in a Curves in that thing just Defenders alone like this so much that's when I have my gross old Wheels

I got rid of those stupid Wheels but the the shape of those things man that mean I mean they could do that with metal but there's so many complicated curves to it just to curve of the door to the fender the back Fender and

that you are a fan of the car lot is this car I compare it to drive that's not that's not a real I mean if you if you drove a regular 1965 Corvette there's sloppy the suspension sloppy the breaks a dog shakes when he is not a regular with that things which color restomod so what that is is a 1965 Corvette but it has a 2007 Corvette engine in it that supercharged and then it has an entirely modern suspension everything is modern coilovers modern breaks big ass corvette brakes big fucking fat wide tires sticky rubber on them that thing doesn't handle anything like an old car that thing handles like a new car as much as you can get a car like that the handle like a new car how much do you drive it all the time I take to the store all the time

you see me take that thing the store should go for a ride with me it's so funny how you spell Tony soprano sax what's the what's the Italian car line Ferrari or Lamborghini Maserati Italian

yeah but those are you know when you make a car out of fiberglass you know it's pretty weird just to go back to that lady that quit High School when she was 16 that she was one of the most wealthiest people in the world like the Chinese lady yeah it's so weird how much stock

we put in high school how much stock is really in high school like right now you have children

I don't know but High School

like I don't know I don't know about high school still and I don't know how I met so many people have quit High School have done better with their lives I thought

when I quit High School I was done I was fucking done that was the one of the worst point in my life I'm in love is like a tattoo I'm going to get like an Ozzy Osbourne has Ozzy on this fingers I was with a Coco I'm both fingers Coco and I remember walking up there that thing on you know what I found so it's High School

like what am I going to eat my chances are really doing anything

I was already quit High School number to put tattoos on my fingers I'm never want to do anything with my life Memoir chicken apple tattoos you know cuz you're afraid you're going to be a loser in 1982 a tattoo was not a work of art tattoo was the you went to jail you killed somebody but he had that 69 cool and fuck he was Ozzy Osbourne and I always end of Ozzy Osbourne I was just some fucking drug. Criminal but I knew that if I quit high school and put Coco how is doing hahaha like I'm both hands I was going to be do is true story bro like that I don't listen to walking to the tattoo places in Cliffside Park

and how much weight they put on high school and like I quit High School my junior year was I good at it yes I was very good at it I was very good at school I just had to quit school cuz of necessity I have no parents you don't have to quit fucking high school you know and it's so weird how many people over the years I've Redline the only reason why I got my GED on the taser I refuse to get my GED because if I would have failed my GED I would kill myself but if you could high school and then fail your GED you really do in life I didn't even want to know about the GED thing but when I got arrested you got to have a GED because you got an extra point to your sentence thing like this is a variable that adds to your not going to prison for that long so if you get arrested in you don't have a GED and you're not working at the time of your arrest this all counts towards your sentencing guidelines

so you only reason why I put that GED fucking thing because I was petrified to take my Joy Road cuz once you fail your GED they ain't no coming back so I got tattoo on my fingers I fucking quit high school and I fucking fail the first GD thing I got would have died like I studied hard for my GED I bought the fucking thing I took a night class with a bunch of people that speak English I studied hard I passed my GED with flying colors but it's so weird how they put such a stress on it when I was growing up and I know tons of kids that sophomore year said my father owns if I can get the mechanic garage or we have a fruit company or my father is in the stock market he's got me a job and I know these kids are doing fine I just saw one West Palm Beach but he was one of the first guys to quit school when I was like worried about my good eye the fuck do you quit school he's doing fine he's Rich As Fuck and education like

quitting learning is what's really scary quitting school the problem with school is school like standardized education write the education that they would like you to get is go to school get out of high school and go to a good college to get a degree and then you go to graduate school and then you are real success but there's a lot of people that did that that they said there was no job for them they did they have graduate degrees and they're not doing well and it's just it's not it's not a guarantee and special in this weird fucking economy the problem with a guy like you or a problem with a guy like me is it we're never going to have regular jobs it was never going to work we're too fucked up for whatever reason for both locked up for different reasons to quit every four days I was like 150 bucks I got to recognize that you had

should have been entertainer nobody ever says like you could be an Entertainer your funny entertaining. Nobody ever brings that up as a viable job option mean while it's obviously a giant job option all of our friends that are like you or I there are Comics they're all they were all fuck ups in high school they all barely made it through whatever job they had they hated every second of it and they all thought they were losers that's one thing we all have in common we were all worried that we were going to be a loser but not no one none of us had someone who said hey Joey your fucking funny man you could be a comic Tribune, Coon open mic night give it a shot see how much Comics make a weekend, headliner Club in the making my pay $1,500 you be like what $1,500 to tell jokes $1,500 anybody that is crazy you talk about what regular people are making bust their ass all week you just show up on a Friday do two shows on a Friday to shows on a sad

one show on Sunday you make $1,500 you get home a lot of times it was Cash you would be like what what how do I get how do I do this job where you have to start an apprentice it's so weird how I can look you in the face and tell you something I knew my freshman year in high school you ready yeah I knew one thing for sure what I did not want to date no job no I didn't say that I wanted a job but not a job we shouldn't office no no there was no day job in the future I was either going to be a bartender a waiter I was going to work in a warehouse I got company White Rose and Secaucus of the frozen warehouse where you just got lobster tails and shouldn't you had a whale a bundled up they paid you $22,090 to buy clothing like I was set to do that I had no problem working 9 to 6 I knew one thing about my life but I was not

taking a day job because the people I grew up around my mother did not have a day job my mother went open the bar at 9 set the bar up beer boom and my 1030 she was in Harlem picking up this going to a Mac game eating Chinese food she didn't go back to the 7 at night then she work till 3 I had no problem with working my first big job was bartending from 5 to 1 in Manhattan I just knew that my days were mine I like that I did not want to be opposite everybody else I wanted you to leave the fucking house when I walked in I'm going to make my own eggs I'm going to smoke a joint and watch TV for an hour sleep till to get up lift weights pendants that's why I wanted not want to date a job that I do people want the opposite some people's personalities that they want to go somewhere with someone tells them what to do they want to sit in a very safe structured environment and do boring shitt I Didn't Know I Was difficult in my town

B Anthony imperatore when I was a kid APA fit everybody the deal was you went down there 1982 let's say it was 1750 an hour

so you shaped to give a shape what's that mean shaped as you just go down there and they look at you like Marlon Brando in on the waterfront you standing like a fucking moron and they come up to you we need 6 people tonight you you look pretty strong you and it started people going to call Shape Up work you got to go sign up at the hall so if you're alone show him and all that shit if you don't have work you go do shape-up work she just go down there and wait for your badge number to be called and then they give you work so I used to work at 8 PA is a shape guy she got on a PA and the first Joe Rogan basement he sees I'm a fucking mule I'm a meal are you ain't going to break me the shift started at 7 and it went till 6 but sometimes at 6 a load of fucking Volkswagen engines came in and here you are with another fucking gorilla picking up Volkswagen engines so I used to what I used to do was you couldn't work more than 6 days a month

how to put you in the unit

so I would work a p a white truck route whatever there was three different companies that you can shape for so what you did was to get into the Union was once I found out Joe is Cool Joe new I work I choose Joy yardstick I threw your hundred so I have guaranteed two days a week work which is still $18 an hour plus overtime sided shape up work

and then if you completed like 12 if they made a mistake and they gave you 12 days in a month now they had to hire you full-time and your life changed forever APA that guy in Pirate Toy why don't you know the owners now the fucking Ferry at the ferry that goes back to New Jersey back and forth and Jersey to New York City that's imperatori didn't stop growing but when we were kids his facility he took such good care of his employees is Jim when the New York Mets went from Long Island to New Jersey that's where they practice the first year that's how good in the 70s is Jim was like have you loaded trucks you were allowed to use that Jim he already had shit that nobody had

do you have fiberglass backboard she had water weights he had shit that nobody had like at that time I saw you but my point being that that was what I had in high school but I could do shape up I like it still make the living and eventually somebody was going to hire me I was going to work like a fucking mule but I'd still be making you know 1500 a week hey what you wish for a lot of money back then which wasn't bad those are the guys that by the boats and they go to Atlantic City and they wear white shoes on the weekends and make more than everybody else so you shape you could also do that as a longshoreman you go down in Newark and stay there and then after 15 days if it gets in the union don't charge you $5,004

which is means that you get 5000 to the enemy you got benefits the rest of your life insurance and a pension and

yeah and you realize that you weren't going to work in a cubicle I did not I knew that but I like that night love you shit you know how much I walked home on Route 3 with no money how many days after loading a truck all night walking home on Route 3 cuz I didn't have enough money for the bus I just had enough money for a breakfast and I would walk up and get breakfast on a diet I go wherever I was sleeping so I go to sleep I didn't know anything, he didn't come into my radar till a month before I went to prison

month before I got locked up a month before I got arrested for the crime nevermind prison there was a Salesman that hide and just we did not get along me and him is car sound like he had this he was American Indian a piece of American Indian and even had that Charles Bronson look in his eyes and one day me and him got into a beef over a customer he said the customers was his and it was mine and me and him banged up face-to-face and had to break us up but about a week later I was on the point that means you're outside waiting for a customer to try to get a customer on point he came out because man listen I don't know what happened between us it's name is Brett

I'll never forget that man if I was 25 years about 40 something 4445

and I had a fucking you know I was doing drugs and I had the tough guy mentality and I bench and I would never raise my hand to some of the old I don't know why what happened that day

we came up to me put on this and they just listen man I don't know nothing about nothing for you cuz you know what I was doing for the last 20 years right I'm not going to know I don't know anything about you is the coordinator for casino Las Vegas you make me laugh and I have no shaking his hand going thank you the fuck away from me I make you laugh with you stupid and he was telling me I had a career in, and I was listen to him he said you should really give it a try

like you're fucking crazy stand-up comedy I like Freddie Prinze I like David Brenner I love Richard Pryor and butt

I'm fucking criminal I can't do this shit not a mutton I got arrested I know when I came out I didn't think about it and then when I fucking came out for reals

there was a guy that lives in

Pismo Beach now

and he used to talk to me about it was everything to the stand up, and I would come on. Give me the fuck alone I'm a drug addict and stand-up comedy

female stand-up comedy was about work

I thought that Joe Rogan just called The Comedy Store should have a camera in 10 minutes I'm going to be down on you tape an hour I didn't know that you had to work 18 months ago an hour but Ariel what I thought that's how fucking off I was I just thought that when I saw John Leguizamo that he just went down there

he just went down into the now and that's what I thought LOL that's weird perceptions of it but you know the thing about it is that it's a possibility and no one ever says that it's a possibility it's not easy possibility but it's an is an option but being a fucking Physicians not easy possibility either but if you tell someone you want to be a doctor they don't look at you like you're crazy the amount of work is probably pretty similar it's a lot of work involved in being a doctor but it's a path that's been taken by many people it's clearly established you go to school you go to medical school you go to residency there's all these different steps that you have to take that everybody's really aware of what does stand-up comedy career no one who's other than the people that have done it no one knows what it is you and I both know that in order to be you know say the physicist you have to go through a certain amount of Education we we we have you had Tim son he's really smart he wants to work for in SpaceX what's Bill rocket ships

okay that's a possibility you can do that you're really smart you go to school you get a good education you fall through eventually disappear out there with, do you like no one knows that path of them people like you are all people have actually done that path and make a living doing it we know it but for everybody in the outside like what is that and sometimes you need someone to come along and tell you like the guy who you were working for me was my friend Steve dr. Steve Graham he was my friend when I was in oh he was telling me this when I was like 19 you know you're really funny like you should be a comedian funny to you and other people going to think I'm an asshole that's all I was thinking I just I wasn't big on public speaking what got me in a public speaking honestly would help me was teaching when I was teaching martial arts I had to teach in front of all these people that I've never spoken in front of groups of people but I was really good at the time

at teaching classes I learned from you know my instructor and there's a way to do it I was very enthusiastic obviously was my life so it's very intense about doing it and I got used to speaking publicly unfriends large groups of people but it's because I'm speaking about something that I I was good at and then I would teach at Boston University you want to go there and teach the classes that start off the classes you know I've basically said to them listen to take this class try hard you going to get an atlas pass fail a and actually counts for your GPA so this is the easy a I don't want you to be fucking Bruce Lee and Jackie Chan you not to do that I just wanted to try if you come here and try you get an A that simple and so you know became friends with a lot of the kids cuz they were like my age some of them were even older than me and I was teaching them so that was how I got into public speaking who's the first time what you think before you even answer besides stand up comedy where you ever ever ever on the stage

well that improv troupe in grammar school a play in High School playing grammar school in college I took now I didn't do anything I don't I don't think I ever did anything like maybe if I did I don't remember but I'm in college I took a course on public speaking it was like some sort of

was some sort of course and where we would do like little play was terrible the teachers terrible she was just a short little lazy lady she's so lazy like the way she would give classes with says it was continuing education program at UMass she was just terrible and there was the people in the class where it was a very Loosely organized and explain the lessons very well and you know we had to put together some little play I Remember was me and this girl in the sky we put together we made some little funny play we wrote it together it was around the same age I was probably thinking about doing stand-up I was probably 19 or 20 at the time

I never wish I always shun him all that stuff I was always embarrassed

and my sister when I got thrown out of Catholic School in the 6th grade I had this guy Miss Lavita on Fridays you had a choice to fucking be Paul ecology Club hang out in the class I don't know what made me I would love with Frankie Valli my eyes adored you so he would make me every Friday go up to the front of the class and put my eyes adored you on a record player and I sing it like not lip-syncing I'd really sing it cuz I really had a good voice growing up I was in the band that sang at what you do in a band you have a sixth grade you've done that fucking rock and roll show what is that what is that Josh Adam Meyers you've done that yeah what you saying Killing In The Name of Love

did you have to learn the song and practice is yet and they wanted me to go to the rehearsal but I couldn't go to rehearsal at De rehearsal no rehearsal the song

where is this being held at this is that

homeless couple years ago this is like a year-and-a-half ago

I love music I'm just I love all this shit I just can't

okay whatever happened to Rage Against machine where they doing these days they all want a different the right day to do right now today there when that bad would be real be real be reels in the band with them Public Enemy they're all in the Renegade come on don't embarrass me I can't yes sons of Rage or something is of rage and it's Tom Morello the singer from Public Enemy be real Chucky Chuck D wow Flavor Flav in it I don't think so I think they tow a flavor flavor you can is he still married to salons ex-wife prophets of rage is a couple of guys from Rage Public Enemy Cypress Hill wife had a baby she was 5585 years old

how the fuck did she have a baby Shad the last egg they found the last day there was tucked up in 1/4 the Fallopian tubes listen man Mick Jagger singing a few women have eggs little long and now I wonder if he's got to dig a Little Deeper you got to dig deep deep deep in that little monkey it's got to be in a Janet Jackson yeah I mean there's the rain now you just need the guy to give you a stabbing to generate everything at the same time be holding back a lot of loads just can't keep those loads for weeks no jerking off no nothing no wet dreams for weeks and then just release the hounds

48 as a woman after 48 from what I've read 4647 to your chances of a child having autism very high is a lot of chances of a lot of little things going wrong with the mail as well you know but one of the factors is also the age of the father that's why you see more autistic kids these days than before as people putting off their having children and having careers later and there's complications it's one of the theories as to why this Moron Test the kids another theory is that there's not more autistic kids would just we're just better at diagnosing what the issue is with children then we used to be before I say we very Loosely obviously

Brigitte Nielsen what do that so she had her first kid this is her fifth should have first kid when she was young and vibrant and the fifth kid when she's basically a monster

God bless God bless God fucking blessing 55 healthy baby incredible I can't believe I my daughter's eyes to see if she was stoned cuz God knows how much THC was in my reef when I shut that load of death

nice shot that's total owed it's kind of funny man when you just think about the window of time that you have to get pregnant and impregnate someone

just so you know you let you run a fever run to someone and you haven't seen them in like 10-15 years you see me like whoa okay time time is real just some people you don't think about it when you see people day-in-day-out I see you all the time you're saying to me you know if you don't see someone 10-15 years like a little hotel room let me read online fucking bullshit Heights curves and hairs in your nose you go to A Whole New Vegas and you walked past the mirror what the fuk happened at any time or are you watching it I watch a paper myself or something on my way home and I'm getting old but you become a monster last week that fucking took a red-eye to Cleveland

get the Cleveland was the only direct flight you know now that everything's fucking crazy to direct flights a day Cleveland I was going to fly but takes you 19 hours right so much choice is going to leave at 11 in the morning leave a day earlier which ain't happening or take a red-eye that night and I took the red-eye and we landed at 6 in the morning which is 3 l a time which I'm never bypass fucking 12:30 anymore

and I took a thing for the hotel me and Jorge Perez you know and for a couple minutes I was little bike look at my fucking life I'm 55 and I'm fucking taking a red-eye to do Cleveland when I got into the hotel room I sat down and sit at my computer I'm like I'm fucking Lucky in mind I'm still doing spots in the fucking store I'm still going out and doing weekends I never dreamt of this past 48 and I'm 55 and headline and having a great time laughing my fucking balls off we forget for a moment of time without was the cartoon the show

and I don't even get pissed off I just said George the top of the car we walked 50 yards of is a cab and that was the end of that I don't even know I told you that well you know it's perception no I mean you know if you showed Brigitte Nielsen a photo of her today when she was 20 and said you going to look like this in 5 minutes she probably freak out trouble terrified but now that she's 55 so I can see what I look like J Howard Marshall Anna Nicole Smith's fucking husband we all were going to go so much time me you you don't stay beautiful forever this is going to be amount of time where your body just stops working right and hear your tissue starts to hang off your face and just it is what it is and it's perception a lot of it is perception you broke it down your jeans look you look somebody like what's girl we discuss a thousand times she was married to Richard Gere

the beauty mark you said you saw her somewhere and she was still fucking beautiful what's your name who's married to Richard Gere Cindy Crawford you got to be kidding me I ran into her 6 months ago on Facebook and it still say hi take care of yourself. Alcohol yes and whether or not you're happy to happiness the alcohol tobacco tobacco and I was thinking about this how it's so weird that once every two years I don't know what the Joe Rogan I hate being this person sometimes I hate being this person I like to have something going wrong like I still have that bug self-sabotage

I should be doing everything else in here I am on the fucking water like an asshole I don't smoke at night when I drive because I can't see it night and I'm saying so I can't smoke I can't get high sometimes I go in the back and I get high so why do my phone I go to Redman assembly give me a fucking cigarette

I smoke 5 fucking cigarettes and I'll smoke for a week do you know that you're open up a pack of cigarettes at 8 at night and smoke like a fiend and throw him out of the car on the way up the hill you know I'm bad I feel the next day

you could see how bad fucking cigarettes are for you and number two is alcohol in a you can see how many cigarettes do you smoke like I'm one knife really after all the other either way in the garbage wow and then the other day it's a lot that's a lie because I'm a Savage real yeah and you don't worry about it do it again all that shit is bullshit to me why you think I said that shit to you last week about the I do everything I'm sober but I do everything

right now I don't do everyone I don't do you take the chip people give you all the time. I just I just took some acid fucking somebody gave me blotter acid and I put it in the back I put in the battery thing I have like a shaver electric the blotter acid and put in the battery thing so became like battery acid they called me and I told me it was Wolfman Jack ass and he didn't know you was mad Jack was Wolfman Jack there's a guy member that guy that mother fucker what I would have to say no guy and Felix wanted some music publishing was horrible so I score some friend The Wolfman Jack sneakers that man and they're both outside the studio

it's got a weird look on his face is like man I dig noises I dig yells and I haven't been this depressed in a long time you got this is just bad now if you don't mind because I had to come down all this battery as and I was drinking last night so I've never forgotten that line as a kid that Wolfman Jack looking them is he still alive no see if you still alive

oh yeah it was born 38 Jesus Christ play that black and white video on the lower right-hand corner yeah we hear that

give me some volume

Wolfman Jack just going to get us kicked off YouTube

bear check from August 1973 his first night at 66 WNBA NBC New York first air check first night

wow how weird

give me a low speed it up a little bit

what are a lot of fucking theatrics back then for the guy even talks several minutes into the recording

what the fuck

if you got better as it went along different world back then all you have to do is have a big personality be loud and crazy and people got used to listen to a certain person on the radio radio personalities were different thing man it's like you would become accustom to listen to someone's voice and it does the person wanted to hear I remember a certain radio DJs Charles laquidara on the big mattress in wbcn Boston listen to it every morning what to do when I was delivering newspapers he was the morning guy and like every place would have a morning guy and this is still a few of them out there the still a few morning guys out there but man they're cutting those guys back there cutting those folks back there would have been away their budget taking away their money you know they have to do personal appearance at Wild Wings and shit like that fucking shoot t-shirts out of a can and all that nonsense it's a dying.

institution the radio world is a Dying World it's weird used to be everybody had a car radio to listen to the radio drove around what we got on the radio so it's TuneIn what's a good local stations you'd find them listen to some good radio talk radio guy I can't lie to you like a talk people list that talk sports and people call in fuck you I love it to Yankee should have beat one last night it was a rough job that shit drives me fucking crazy by the way congratulations on the Boston Red Sox they were fucking cough

I don't watch baseball throughout the day I don't have time but the Cuban When September Comes I love the Art Van Der rohe and it's a beautiful by the way back and I got a GED I'm lonely I'm the only Cuban like them play baseball

I'm possibly the only Cuban that was the worst baseball player in the fucking world even my mother's have gone to the game I can't I can't you just embarrass the shit out of me I was terrible but during the playoffs I watch that show religiously yeah I talked to my uncle and he fills me in my uncle's tremendous my uncle fucking know she's a tease but watching baby nose so I can get on the phone with him during the playoffs and he'll be watching and I'll talk to him he's he's at he's writing me off in Spanish look at the way he throws the ball made me look at his finger how it's all that means it's a different art and Boston was just too tough to shit euroland at Steve's baseball player with the eaves it's tough to play and stuff that's why me and your old partner the UFC with tight Goldberg with both Cincinnati Reds fans they mean by thieves will steal bases

I got into the picture of sadness. Join their arms and now the pictures got to keep looking his shoulder and if you ever get a chance to watch an old Sin City Red Bull apart a good game if I find one I'll send it to you and you watch what that the picture I wonder if the coach comes out and get that takes the ball from the guy and the guy walks off and they call a reliever with the Cincinnati Reds the coach of come out in the bitch would go take this fucking ball I don't want to picture again because since that it was the king of bunting getting on 1st and playing with your hair starting to do it still second and it would hit a single the Cincinnati Reds won those all those years of with Pete Rose. That means that you're you going to have a problem

and ham and consepcion and Morgan all those people that would just single hitters those are the worst at least with a homerun I know where I stand but these motherfuckers that club you would single bubbles that's a different game and then I'm stealing from here to really get down like I'm stealing second estate and third that that's that's it that's Sparky Anderson that movie I know you never watched it but that's what I was about the movie with Brad Pitt you feel about baseball that's a great movie because he explains to you that it's on base percentage all that other shit is bullshit but they like yeah but this guy walks a lot but he got on base

that's what it's all about yeah and that's the city and Boston play that same game that see you stay still it was heart attack baseball you could watch if you bet the last 5 Games God bless you God bless you try to think I got back to my room and leave you at 2:30 in the morning still playing 2:30 in the morning I went to bed the Dodger game still on

it's tremendous this is the time of year with that I love playoff baseball one starts in April I don't want no nothing I don't want none of that shit none of that shit

I play baseball when I was a kid I stopped doing it when I got into martial arts I found out about Taekwondo because I was waiting for a Red Sox game waiting for the T to get home and there's a big ass line get to the tea cuz Fenway Park would let out and walking back from Fenway Park to the train station I saw the Taekwondo school and I went up there and this guy named John leaves a national heavyweight champion light heavyweight champion at the time and he was about to go to the World Cup and he was up there kick in the shit out of the heavy bag I never seen anything like it in my life I would hear in the sounds of it I was walking up the stairs

pink and The Womp was him kicking the bag in the tank was the chain as the bad would go flying through the air and Slam against the chain was like that is the craziest fucking sound and I walked in and there's this guy who was just you know at the peak of his physical power he was just at his very best news training for a World tournament and just watching him do that was so terrifying thinking like if someone kicked me like that like what it would do to my body and that's how I got into martial arts in the team sports man that's one of the reasons why I got into wrestling and Lisa wrestling it's me against that guy I hated team sports I hate the fact that we were losers cuz Little Billy drop the ball like I didn't and I didn't play for the team either they would tell me how heartbroken go try to get a single eye but yeah yeah I either got a home run or I struck out every fucking time I was a pet

cuz I got a home run once and I was like oh that is so much better than getting a single you could suck dick for the rest of your life for singles I don't give a fuck about a single I have felt bad if I go on base and I got a single cuz I connected once cock car rack and the ball when I get hit pretty hard not ball went fucking for lion and it went into the stands and I was like oh this is what it's about it's about doing that the only thing that's any good about the stupid fucking dad and catching ball so many cracks went out there and catch it that's pretty fun

and available all my life I used to bunt a strike on and make an excuse like I was just terrible at baseball I just had no nothing for it when I went to Miami I used to go to red berries baseball camp in the Summers just for a week it was a week and that you went that in like a basketball with my shit yeah basket we good real good real fucking good really real good with the Five-Star Basketball Camp in Harvey garfinkel my shoulders are so bad that my shoulders do a junctional Jiu-Jitsu yeah but I can't you can't get me an Americana like you can't I tell people don't Americana me you would come more of me is that bad yet really go for physical therapy please give him a ride I should buy that you know how to listen you got to pick your battles and today's Insurance world

so get to the point where I could lift you can go to kickboxing and I can hold a microphone I'm fine I'm fine for right now my left my right knee is fucked up going to have to do something soon but for right now it's wrong with it that it never fixed I think the one I was doing physical therapy I read heard it after the surgery and never had fried is that whole thing I am so I go back in there again and let it all cleaned up now I love basketball but I also love martial arts growing up I love the whole thing of going up to inform in practicing and they can do some fucking tremendous it with stem cells right now Joey I could fix all your problems I bet you pick show up they fixed it. Flexible are you let me see you

grab your hands and do that shit we go all the way back and do all that show you how to do everything

grab them Gove can you do that shit to me like this people could grab them at my kickboxing place and go all the way over there they could grab them and go all the way over when you mean here like they do something different like how are you saying like do this and go all the way I'm done hanging just hanging just grab ahold of bar chin-up bars and hang from it super good for your shoulder stretches amount releases impingements too good for the joint out here to stretch out

if you don't have to do a pull-up pull-up the great for jujitsu though you can still talk to this day can't do one no never do a pull up even when I was 180 lift some weights with strange guys you can do a pull-up when you were 180 that doesn't even make me some know what the fuck it was I move to but I want to see brown they have another brother and that another friend and that train them in the sky name Ira wolf where I grew up Ira wolf went to the Olympics to be a training and these except one got two of these guys are still alive and these guys did not believe in traditional lifting they believed in slow motion heavy lifting

can count on the way down and I can't count on the way up how can I still believe in that strength doubles like your strength doubles like that the strength age so it is slow motion nose really into that Einstein no Eddie's up Blackbelt Scott Epstein yeah he's really in the slow mo training who's always into motion slow motion lift these guys were and today the one guy who talked in awhile ago and he has no injuries all that lie all that like that they switched me when I was doing behind the next in front of the next feel like you're wasting your time just do squats cleans what's the other one they do that guess you're fucking traps Triton ginormous you just get one Thirty lanes and pressing just just the first queen. Just just the first clean don't even know that shit yeah I love all that shit

yeah I like the straight ball I've been squatting kettlebell classes for a while to write what you if you read that that guy's book are they talking about pavlof he says that the kettlebells I don't even know if that's his name is it supposed to be like 15 minute workout yeah what they do is they is the cross the new CrossFit Community is taking kettlebells and you just hurting people kettlebells are done for you to feel good in to enhance a different workout like when I do kettlebells thank God for all that are you I can buy them in the club will work out Alberto crane taught me how to do Swings with Club batch will you turn your insides of your wrist so everything turned so yeah I like a lot of Fashion on my shoulder because I do it that way so when I do a Kettlebell workout Incorporated with the bats from on it and I do it like a sir

the training I do this a straight one all this and even with that even cuz I before I went to physical therapy I want to try the club bats because they have all the way down the end of the help pull that shoulder all the way the fuck down like for me to do anything how to stretch my shoulder before and after really deep I got to go against the wall I don't want to leave him to the guy brought on Alberto guzzini delete a lot of his little right now I got some great stuff on in the guy send it to me the beginning they call it something else instead of warm up they called something else that name is not Josh Wolf of these fantastic fantastic about clubs that they're not that heavy but they're odd so I can holding on to the end of it but the wait is it the end of the other end and it's this long thing so it's very awkward

and you could get a really good work on with 15 pounds and you really can't that's all I use 15 and said I got A5 from Monett to break my wrist you going to 5 and you really could really break the flash on your wrist with the five they have an exercise that you go over and twist full set of out here if you don't want to use your Mendes tremendous tremendous why am I swing in the gorilla Gorilla I love Steve Maxwell stuff so I keep it I keep Steve Mack and then you were the one I called you at the last dilemma and you were like well let's do it so now I do three three and three and I'm out yeah that's three factors led to clean and three swings

really most hotels are starting to come around I go to a hotel I check when I go up I roll a joint I go downstairs I smoke on the way back I checked by the gym if I see kettlebells I'm very happy but I keep it at 3:30 and 3 because over 50 it should just be 3 days a week it takes a lot for you to recuperate while it's also you can get in more wraps over the week that's really what you want if you do a lot of reps in one day the problems you destroyed afterwards but if you do the same amount of wraps over the course of five days just too short of workouts and do many of them you don't get ever get destroyed your body is fine you do all the other things you do too and I think you'll become more consistent with it you don't you know I get worried about you just going to get to incorporate when you get to incorporate the class

doing the Technician 3 5 minute rolls after that I get up and walk away cuz I had to defeat the purpose

right at the Norva sword bed twice a week especially on Sunday but Novas for bed what is that they sent you some information is my therapy okay I'll Oglethorpe bed twice a week novus ordo yes Nova Thor that look it up okay so weak especially on Sundays to take all the fitter healthier happier then I go in the crawl therapy two or three times a week so what I did was I shorten my workout and I could do it more often me going to Jiu-Jitsu class and fighting added to the debt right there's nothing for him yeah I'm not going to approve and I'm not going to do that because I'm not going to be able to roll three or four more days now yeah that's the thing as we're covered I really want online and 50 and I'd number one you got to go for you God over 50 strength

thank God because that sarcopenia a fucking kill you and that's when you start getting Punchy and we all become our grandfather and when you do stand-up it's it's you just got to be strong so if I went back I got to meet these guys twice a week and we pack it on I don't even know what you put on there cuz it gives me anxiety and we open up with a squat to really get the system will fucking the frenzy you would have just no jumping jacks is no bench we open up the warm out first I will do a little warm up and the first two sets I see the fucking devil

it's on a stopwatch there's no sets it's on a stopwatch any mean so he'll go for hours before minutes go to four minutes of squatting squatting for 3 minutes 3 minutes or so but it's 10 seconds up 10 seconds back the last two I'm fucking I'm seeing the devil I'm thinking about getting a heart attack my whole thing and the right angle of pull-down machine right from there I go to a back twister it's really weird how he does it but I'm all in 22 minutes that's a good workout I mean getting two minutes lifting some weights getting that a bone density tightening up all your all the muscle groups for Ed commercials you don't want to eat then you got to get the malukas stick and that's from lifting weights

lifting a little light weight 3 days a week he's doing it for asthma lipstick all that shit they sell what is the GNC in Frank Thomas High and it's good for your lady to watch it don't work those Frank Thomas's bunch of thirsty white people hanging out with have those commercials of the freeway so sexy. I did a study of the independent study to see what works the most oatmeal with coconut milk and that mother fucker and some deadlifts and squats you'll be stabbing people to your show me things Elevate testosterone increase your hormone levels that's for sure but deadlifts and squats are the kings of exercise those are so important because they work your whole chain they work everything go to Shayla

Dolce me and him but everybody does find somebody. His book that's what I really I went to the Y one day and I started like I started like I got to coach the first time to go over the basics of me I don't like three weeks later I thought I was Mike Dolce and I wasn't into the center of 5 that list bro I could feel it and my central nervous system like you really does hurt your central like you just feel like this fucking realizes OG's is this crazy fog is it needs us to lift weights and needs us to carry heavy things all the time so you probably just get stronger and it's only one way to get stronger anybody going to increase testosterone is going to rebuild all that tissue that you're breaking down

how's Aries number to disturb that they thought they were going to win I'm ahead by like 2,000 points this is what I'll tell you where it right now I mean obviously got all these guys I'm the one who's been working out all the time I'm obviously I've been working on my whole life it's so I have 10000 139 Ari's in second place with 8299 yeah Tommy buns in third place Tommy has just recently banged out another hundred so he's 8259 and Bert is strong in last place

strong talking all kinds of mad shit and then he's more than 2,000 points behind me that slob

and I haven't even worked out today and when I workout today they're all going to quit I'm going to I'm going today even though I'm 2,000 points ahead I'm going to go for 6 hours today is a day of death as many as a thousand points in a day no one is ever going to close that you just got to fucking keep going thing is when your exotic I can't I can't do this anymore yes you can I do a variety of different things break identification I run the hills with the dog for a good hour and I'll do about 2 mi in the hills with a dog so he's exhausted otherwise he's a puppy you know he's he's two years old he's a pain in the ass if he's not worn out so I wear his little ass out so we run for to you know to my house which is in the hills of steep hills turns out to be about 40 minutes ish 45 minutes closer now get back stretch out a little and then I decide what else I want to do yesterday it was kickboxing so I

the bag for another hour and a half I turned on some old fights in the gym and just fucking went to town put on the ringside timer so it's giving me rounds and the ringside timer wood gives me 30 seconds to so I go 30 seconds hard 30 seconds not so hard 30 seconds are 30 seconds and that's a hard one minute break no kick the shit out of that fucking fag hard you up but started coming out if I went home later on and see what the fuck I did nothing my town my toe nails are cut if you slam your shin into a bag for an hour and a half or full blast some tissues going to break down so right now everything still are my ankles are sore my knees are sore my lower back is sore I went I went whole ham yesterday but you know that wasn't a big day for

yes it was like 4 430 something Point that's a big day for some of that it's the most I've ever worked out is I did six and a half hours and I got a thousand points I did five and a half hours I got 900 points and then I did another hour just to sort of like at the end of the day just to loosen everything up it just hit the bag for an hour just I just because Bert was talking so much shit I was like this is where we're going to put the bills everything Joto's I'm going to double will see he went hiking with Ari and was quitting I was hiking hiking is walking it's walking these guys are walking into getting tired and he's talking about beating me in a fitness contest it's outrageous plus he's in normous Lee overweight the one who's the real issue is rer he's a sneaky fuck or I might try to pull it out even those two thousand

right behind you might try to murder himself over the next two days get to 2,000 points and then put another 1,000 into beat me on the third day he be literally might try to do that but I'm not going to let him

we're here we're queer that they're sitting there and fighting for second place good luck boys I let them get close up until a while ago until about a week and a half ago and then I just turned it on I'm like okay here we go to plan my plan was to to get you know first of all I was not doing this much cardio before so we're at 29 days instead of 30 what is today's 29th 29.29 Days Inn I've taken 4 days off I took 3 days off cuz I went to Vegas with my family when we were the UFC so we can go on Thursday Wednesday till Sunday I'm not going to work out just go have a good time relax see if he's got to catch up so they caught up to me and that's when I'm done with that now it's time to kick it into full gear and then when I kicked into full gear I'm steady every day 3 hours a day 3 and 1/2 hours a day 4 hours a day sometimes sometimes

two and a half hours in the morning at 2 and 1/2 hours at night just 600 points a day 700 points a day 800 points a day whatever I got to do to stay way ahead and then my my goal was so the last few days to be so far ahead that they're fucking they're all just scratch and Claw on for second place what's the what's the what's the stuff this year was you don't get anything but I wanted to lose it have to drink a goblet of everybody else's piss that's what I wanted I want it cuz I want to burn to drink piss I feel like Bert has to lose this I don't see how Tom can't I was sick he was sick as a dog on antibiotics like 5 days came back in one day and he ran 13 motherfuking miles to 600 points yeah ran around the neighborhood 13 fucking miles the dude ran for three and a half hours just ran

doesn't want to lose it doesn't want to lose to burn even if you only comes in third place as long as he's not as long as you beat the bird that's where everybody's at Spirit talk so much shit everybody just want to make sure that bird loses he's got the DiMaggio Jean competition cuz he's just like he can push himself but there's a big difference in pushing yourself and pushing yourself for a whole month that's where he's falling apart and he's been talking so much shit they were all laughing at them so yesterday we're all everybody's going out is it today

sorry if I sound super aggressive I still love them but man

sandbaggers bro sandbaggers new stats and he's allowed to do that but we're not supposed to do that you're supposed to look the manly thing to do is to put it all on the table and make everybody try to fucking keep up that's the manly thing to do. He is obviously a sneaky fuck right and he obviously is also the one who worked out the least at all of us so he at one point time stored up a thousand points and had them on this device and they released him and Bert had went fucking crazy

is bird thought you said alright then all sudden re-shot ahead of him that's how it works this is a competition right yes it's going to get he's going to lose that fight is going to be last Tom's going to work out today Tom's going to pay Tom I told you Tom got six hundred fucking points yesterday or they're fighting they're fighting at a group text let me see what's going on here oh my God it's long it's very long oh boy there's a lot just a lot of fighting

Birds very angry very very very angry he's very angry because he's going to realize is going to come in last cuz he was saying he was saying yesterday he goes barely winning I go bird I'm ahead of you yesterday was 2300 points I could you have any idea what the fuck you would be saying if you were headed by 2300 points be respectful

gorgeous fucking liar man new fucking liar look

this you know this is a big game it's if I don't get hurt it's a rigged game that's just what it is I quit drinking and smoking nothing you looked at you funny alright cuz this is the fucked-up day my feelings are even hurt every Wednesday I go to pizza after karate with Mercy we go eat pizza and was sitting at its neighborhood pizza driver sitting at

and I look at my wife when I go isn't that Burke

and it's a dude walking through neighborhood look just like dirt with a hat on I put my pizza down and go on Tango a cocksucker I see you drinking cuz it look like he had a six pack or whatever holding it he turned around waved at me and kept walking this is Bert Kreischer

right this but Christ is a guy that you know I figured he come back and talk to me

so the next daily tells me I told me that maybe you guys want birthday yell at me then come and talk to me when he puts down one of your fans yelled at him he didn't know who it was didn't know who it was and he can't walk your dog if I yell at you you'll know it's fucking me if I say cock suck at the end of the speech you know it's me look without the birth does first of all Burton knows he's behind it's staggering amount he put in the most bitch ass workout today he got

what is this a hundred 49 points

that is that is not enough he worked out for an hour and 50 minutes you got a hundred 49 points because look at the end see the end all those Grey's if it stayed on Captain strap-on he worked out it says an hour for that he worked out for 40 minutes and he kept a strap-on for an hour because he's dying so you get some points for having an elevated heart to look at this all this gracious at the end she pokes see how this

I'll show people here all this nonsense

you get for 80% your heart rate you get yellow for 90% of your max heart rate you get red I tried to go all red the first day I'm like I'm going to kill them I'm just going to Sprint for half an hour and just make these guys catch up there's no way they catch up then re and his fucking ingenious and devious ways found out that you get just as many points for 80% is good for 90% we figured so that they avoid lawsuits so is that okay so it seems like a sweet spot is in 80% so just stick to 80% so you can do that or you can be like Bert and Bert barely gets to 70% mostly stays in the 60% range which is gray and then 80% which is it is well 60%

is like this 50 60 and 70 and 70s green know ya 70s green and then blue is 60 so he's a mostly blue 60% of Max heart rate which by the way I might be at right now cuz I'm getting angry so if you got mad you'd be in like the blue and you get 2 points at a minute for the blue you get four points a minute for the yellow where it goes see 60% to 70% you get blue bird is almost all grey and blue and if you look at this fucking slobbery work out he's got look at all that shit

it's 60% and lower most of his work out so that means most of the work out that he did for an hour and 49 minutes it's him with a fucking thing on just sitting around. It's an hour and 30 minutes so it's most of it is him with the thing on just sitting there being fat that's all it is is what is what is just called cuz I like to go on my zone Fitness tracker this is the thing you put on your chest yes you put it's a Once I snap decision will start measure my heart rate and I'm going to put it on when I get out of here I'm going to start working out and today these the three days of death

today is Monday tomorrow is Tuesday and Wednesday we go crazy Joey Diaz Wednesday I work out to 11:59 and then at 11:59 I pop out off and I walk away at 11:59 then I go have a glass of wine cuz it hits midnight no weight qualifications on this nothing nobody. Probably fucking gained weight I have lost any weight I've eaten everything that moves I put in zero dietary restrictions ate a whole carrot cake the other day was the amount of calories in a burning is fucking insane I can give you a for instance on a day like a good calorie day and terms like how much a yesterday one workout 2214 calories 3 hours 25 minutes and then the day before that 1930 calories

the day before that it was two workouts one was 1876 calories one was 2210 calories is it mean insane amount of calories one workout I had was 4900 tablets that I'm bored so I left but the lift doesn't give me much left is like blue and green that's all you ever get it from lifting cuz I'm Springs or chin-ups presses cleans and presses windmills clean press squats Renegade rows or kettlebell how would you get you fat Jiu-Jitsu would probably be pretty good but this thing we get in the way if anybody mounted you would crack the same would crack you don't eat leaves you lost this oh my God

but I can break this with my finger I'm pretty sure I can break this it feels like giving lines a lot yes that's the number I did an hour and a half of it in that bag yesterday the gym at home so right I went fucking hog on the other picture I put fights on once I put fights on your fire. Might just start fucking well on that bag and keeping the party going but see if I if I got cocky right now these fucks could catch me especially re cuz he's probably going to send back some more and and hide his numbers cuz he just wants to beat Bert cuz he got super pissed at Tom what the fuck Tom is Tom put up all those points yesterday 600 points in a daze a lot of points but I like I said dude ran like I'll tell you what he did

Aram 13 fucking miles in his neighborhood and this is after being sick but he's feeling it today

yeah today gets 145 points that's not good you're not going to win with that then see if they're not trying to win the trying to beat everybody that he was a u.s. cryotherapy cuz I went over there like fruits just left here so I know he was doing something but I know he hasn't been going consistently suit watches diet either that's the problem with Bert he's not watching diet he's not eating well either it's the Boost that sugar is a mother fucker. You know what I'll Skillz you I saw you both think that that fucking hell does it kind of shit that fucking blood sugar and they make them by my house with Chia seeds and Juju but I'm in the middle of like these brutal workout I'll drink a whole soda

in the Middle where can I drink a cream soda yesterday in the middle of a workout I needed sugar I needed it I didn't know you needed it cuz I felt like I needed it I was fucking burn out so many calories and I'm on my my blood sugar is crashing so hard I'm eating fruit I mean I eat when I the one day that I worked out where I did five and a half hours I was eating boxes animal crackers housing everything I could what I do is what you told me to do when I get home from tie or lifting and I made a protein shake I put it I swear to God I take the Hershey's syrup you told me just a little bit and I just not even out of it and with the Mexican chocolate works perfect and taste like fucking it out so I do that with the protein drinks but I try to avoid sugar nothing no more

Rheem loss of electrolytes and extreme loss of glucose I mean I'm putting salt and on my water I'm drinking bought a bunch of these Nalgene on a Nalgene bottle is like with a Twist top it's a thick heavy plastic 32 oz bottle of water I'm drinking three and four of those in a workout in those I'm putting electrolytes and then I'm putting a sprinkles of Himalayan salt so I'm putting like a little like a half a teaspoon of Himalayan salt and each one of them shaking it up cuz I'm I am losing insane amount of water I sweat so hard I said off the fucking alarm I set off my fire alarm in my gym from sweat for my steam the wrote the whole room was like a shower from me steaming and I put it up on Instagram this is the kind of workout I'm doing I mean I'm pushing hard cuz this is did not making it easy these guys are actually doing it

so much for my workout

can I set off the fucking fire alarm that's legit there's puddles on the ground that's not for me pissing my pants that's all sweat so I'm I'm sweating so much because I'm staying in the 80 at 80% of your max heart rate range for hours I'm staying there for hours so my thought was there's no way they can do that they're not going to do that there's no way

can I do that for 5 hours but just not so like if I did one day like that I felt like one day where I did I got a 935 points in one workout and then another hundred points afterwards I make one day like that will separate me from the pack just one day to put Phoenix about stuff some of the stuff you do doesn't that kind of email I testosterone I told him to give him a doctor's information I told them what they should do but I'm also at least 8 years older than all of them right how old R E 41 41 or 51

now I'm all in all it was a hormone replacement therapy I started doing all that when I was 40 so that's their age

is it makes a big difference fuck yeah listen everybody everybody listen to there's a stigma attached to that in a lot of people are you know where did your testosterone from my balls all that matters is that you have in your system if you don't have it in your system you're not going to feels good it's real simple if you're fine with not feeling is good good go ahead stick with that but if you're not fine with it this is 2018 hormone replacement therapy exist for a reason and that reason is it makes you feel way better and makes your body work way better you can avoid a host of ailments and conditions that are related to your body breaking down due to age with hormone replacement therapy the key to doing it those to do it correctly it's supposed to go to a doctor that's going to test your blood levels test your nutrient levels and adjust your diet first the first thing that have

they want to find out how much your sleeping house-to-house how stressed out you are what are you eating how much water you drinking are you getting the proper amount of protein and vegetables are you eating correctly let's get you off of the sugar let's get you off the booze let's get you off cigarettes or whatever else is before they do anything so they put you that it's this is a many many month process that I went through with a they get you off of all the different things and you make these adjustments and then they start adding a little stuff at a little bit of growth hormone at a little bit of testosterone versus cream and then became injections takes a little bit of time to figure out what works best and then you get to a point where your you have the hormone levels of a healthy young man you don't want to elevate you don't to be higher than that that's when you run into problems you don't want to be in like crazy Vitor Belfort when he got popped from Reno Nevada and he was like some superhuman levels

it was I supposed to fight Rumble Johnson what's the afternoon done to the Christian nice guy Nate Marquardt Dave Marquardt levels really high in Pittsburgh that night Mets right yeah they said he's buried in danger it was like it was there is dangerous to his health the levels but he says that was his doctors dr. fuck them the whole idea what is the difference between a big difference in someone is competing in mixed martial arts obviously you have to worry about your point of getting hurt because of the fact that your enhanced neither young guys are doing this when they was doing this he was like 30 years old right

when you're talking about his General Health and Wellness testosterone replacement therapy hormone replacement therapy does a reason why a lot of older guys especially guys who can afford it they have money they're doing Michigan better just does and if you don't want to do it that's fine there's ways of elevating your testosterone natural they just don't work as well did with his dad lives are running hills doing sprints they work a little bit better it works a little bit better than nothing but it just watched a very good but not enough for what you're saying I know that she's I've discussed raising levels of testosterone to acupuncture I would like to see studies on that problem is it's really painful for that yeah I'd like to see studies on that I don't know if that's really been proven if that was really proven ways to raise it you know the chick I was with for years told me

case studies that she had been involved in she told me a guy came in once they found the younger girlfriend his wife passed and they found the other girlfriend you can keep up and he couldn't keep up so he came in to see you and she did a bunch of stuff and put them on a t he came back a week later and said turn that shit off cuz my dick will not shut down like but she told me she was I can raise your testosterone levels but it has to be needling for your feet you going to find that little bit uncomfortable and I was like leave it alone then I don't want to fucking walk around all this stuff that we talking about whether it's warmer replacement therapy or squats or deadlifts really all these things will help hormone replacement therapy helps the most the thing about this kind of a competition that we're doing though we're not doing anything that you need massive amounts of testosterone. All this is about as willpower file form 130 days it's a lot of his discipline and willpower and

do I have any advantage it's that I have a gym in my house and I have a gym in my studio and I wrong with my dog almost every day in the hills and I've been doing that for years I've been taking that dog runs to 6 months old he runs in the hills with me all the time you fall in love with running I love it you know why I love it Joey here's a big thing because it makes me feel better in terms of like my mental state like I'm happier when I run out of time this whole month I'm fucking I feel great and I don't just feel great because I'm not smoking pot like I mean maybe that's help maybe that's good in some way maybe it's good to not smoke I was pot pot you know I enjoy it babe it's not good to smoke as much as I do know Thursday I plan a New York I probably won't smoke I mean I might smoke a little over the weekend I'm going to play some pool my boy Tommy Junior

down in the New York but

the what the thing that really helps cuz I'm I'm doing insane amounts of exercise hours and hours of exercise a day

you don't give a fuck about normal bullshit like all the chatter or the negative chattering your head that shit goes away doesn't exist I don't care I'm super, no anxiety anxiety goes away I think I'm not a depressed person I don't suffer from depression but we all had Tyson Fury on the podcast last week it was amazing amazing he's a fucking He's a brave man the way he opened up about all I can help it doesn't just help it helps fucking tremendous if I if I found a drug if a doctor put me on medication I was like. I'm fine I'm happy everything's good the docks like I would just like you to just try this for a while and tell me tell me how makes you feel you just put me on something and I have to take a pill a day and I felt as good as I feel right now sitting in front of you I would be like wow you were right I feel better

this exists but it only gets you through discipline and no but you can't give someone something that forces them to work out almost every fucking day I worked out this month I didn't want to do it almost every day the only thing that kept me doing it is Burt going to double with JoJo bows

all that that got me angry that got my competitive juices stirred and just the idea that these guys working out my whole life these guys barely work out like they going to beat me some sort of fitness competition that involves will power and light that's not going to happen I'm going to put in more time than you I'm just going to but all that aside when I did do it just doing I feel fucking fantastic House of Blues now I do something for days a week minimum since I've been on Weight Watchers I didn't hit the bottle one week because I was on antibiotics I got a rash on my leg and so when I left I felt a little weird but I still did everything is Hard Exercise and antibiotics I felt it lifting squats at a stop

your system I can't I borrow that I couldn't do it that's a real wake-up call for people that don't understand the benefits of probiotics does probiotics like taking acidophilus or eating kimchi are in eating anything that's going to help you or your microbiome it's so beneficial to your your well-being to it the way you feel the way your health is Your vitality and all that stuff is connected I like yogurt yogurt fucking grateful I love you Rick yummy yogurt a lot I don't like the Greek as much as the other when I get the low point one I'm at lunch I ate almost every damn shit juice but you got to watch the sugar in that what you should not bad at all she's going to be very beneficial really good at avoiding sicknesses but with this exercise the amount of exercise that I'm doing I'll drink bottles

don't worry about nothing that there's a lot of benefit in that to me just to be able to eat whatever the fuck I want I mean I've been eating everything in front of me man this whole month I mean the doubled how much food I eat just eating fucking it's crazy how much I got to watch everything I get it at night Sam is good I do a lot of chicken breast to my meeting take is cut just to assert I don't agree with you on the meeting take anymore especially at night I'll talk with that shitted at night no more if I even made it to maybe 3 times a week don't get me wrong I still crave a fucking steak but if I can take my wife out of the day for the state the first thing I do is cut it in half and I save it for the next day for breakfast or something nothing wrong with that try to eat meat early in my day

let it digest by the time the end and you and I were talking about the fish that they let you know after you get older you lose things you just can't eat them and I've had I think Sebastian told me that gravy bothers him and my buddy Jersey was hysterical he's like I can't even walk past Pizza Plaistow well it's it's also don't let defeat gout people get from wine you know used to be called like Emperor's disease

cuz people would just sit around and drink wine when they were rich like it's like it was a rich person's disease way back in the day is wine bad. Once everything is bad in excess cinnamon sugar is terrible and it says you have you know if like the rock eats like a fucking a plate of cookies one day a week nothing wrong with that nothing wrong with a day where you fuck off have a cheat meal some wrong with that as long as the majority of your diet is healthy the majority or Diet should consist of leafy green vegetables healthy fats healthy me you know grass-fed beef

they forget the sponsor but they they they give you they sell actual cage-free eggs people say cage-free but they're all fucking jammed in together they might as well be in the cage what is a v i t a l v t o farms in the eggs they have are fucking dark orange yolk that are robust yoga taste better than his brothers cuz those are they still giving you great and they haven't been giving me eggs lately that begin like a couple eggs a day at the most is an old man out of the store I recognized I think they're just saw them in the store

but you know they have services that will deliver stuff from store to your house now how crazy is that Cuban's eat eggs fried eggs and white rice or fried rice the oven on white round white rice I love it and then the other Cuban thing is white rice with a steak on top I love it with two eggs on top of that you're supposed to be excellent horseback Willowick Ohio good now what are you saying that the special over white rice I'll only break I can't even fucking pancakes no Hardy pancakes I can have one from Dennis's a bunch of bread but they have the heart party oats ones with little bit of

1 / 0 calorie maple syrup will you know when you can get there's a company called know Foods know foods and they make a fucking they make waffles that are like I don't know what these almond flour some of that they taste good low carb very low sugar they fucking taste fantastic and they have a zero sugar syrup The Taste fucking great I'll put melted butter on those motherfuckers and that zero sugar syrup and eat that shit out of waffles taste good if you eat it you don't feel bad it tastes good and when it's over you don't feel like a fucking like you got hit with an insulin Dart you don't feel like I got that feeling that you get when you eat like real waffles with real sugar an hour later you barely can walk not with these these these fucking things you feel

fantastic

Joey Diaz you Netflix special day out tomorrow right Jesus Christ I put up a thing that are boring all Michael Klein made one by one podcast

can't play a man standing in front of them driving me crazy but I like the clip the club looks good it's funny I'm very thankful Netflix for giving me the half-hour you know I just feel at times like I didn't do really well on the show like I felt like I felt hard on yourself you're an artist know but you know I felt like and not to be trying to be cute it's funny like when you see Rhonda get kicked and she was sitting there for the first 3 minutes she was upset about the cake but you also said about the train you see all the holes in your training when you made mistakes little mistakes you made even two weeks ago and Conant went down for a couple minutes he was just sitting that he's not thinking about the dirty Melanie mad there's no bit trying about the mistakes that got you there you know and it was weird that I didn't think I did that well and Netflix special I can personally I wanted to do better you know

but it but ever since that you can't ever since Utah July June 30th I've been on a different level of understanding, I went back to the Mitzi Shore technique

I don't give a fuck 55 you don't like me I don't give a fuck well that's why I offend you I really don't give a fuck this is who I am and that's it I've been having some tremendous that's in the original that's a benefit of doing these things the benefit of do any specials as you grow abandon all the material and then you forced to regroup and you forced to look at the material look at you set see what you don't like some people never do that Joey and they never grow because of that it's just but the growth I've had since June 4th

I feel like Dustin Poirier and Max Holloway together like I see it like in the original now I'm back to rare form like I finally had to watch at it at I just didn't just got my head I don't watch couple at some red fox specials I cop I watch couple any Bruce patches I went back to my favorite I got all the vinyl from Richard Pryor and I went back and listen to it I came to the conclusion that what was he giving a fuck about I can't give a fuck about audiences this is what the fuck I am I'm going to unleash the wrath of fucking God I am weak I'm out of here we'll see what the fuck it is you know the worst thing I did was a week before Jim Norton said something that kind of bothered me once in the night and I understood after you said it you said you didn't watch people specials

me I like watching Tommy specials I love watching but a week before my special did the worst thing in the world that watch John Mulaney special was a great writer

what's a great writer I'm not a great writer everything was me as my energy so I wanted to be John Mulaney and that's what I felt Looking Back Now now I got it all out of the way I know exactly what the fuck I am and you in trouble I'm taking into murky Waters now every shop and I'm going to say something to offend you because that's who I am I got to talk this dirty shit you know I don't give a fuck what anybody thinks anymore but they want some I fit my wife closet Joe you having a white moment you're not white you're cute but not going to start off like I get headshots I promise I don't even know what is a picture of me offline I don't give a fuck you look so you don't give a fuck thank you very much

Marcelino you know because I've got some shit to do before I leave for New York I'm not going to be around but I'll be around after that okay November 1st What about love you too man was great to see you always so tonight it is at midnight Thursday until 8 I'm yours is the 30th so tonight you can check it out live on Netflix shout out to Netflix thanks for thank you very much and I love you I love you thank you everyone for tuning in to the show and thank you to our sponsors thank you to the motherfuking cash app download the cash app for free in the app store or the Google Play Market now and when you download the cash app and to the referral code Joe Rogan all one word you get $5 in the cash app will generously send $5 to our great friend Justin wrens fight for the Forgotten charity building Wells for the pygmies in the Congo thank you thank

thank you also to the host of Joe Rogan. Com Squarespace Squarespace out for free and find out how fuckingawesome it is check it out go to squarespace.com go for a free trial then when you're ready to launch the amazing website that you build yourself oh shit use the offer code Joe save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain and thank you thank you thank you to the underwear that I that cradles my package every day of the week meundies my favorite all-time underwear and now they have the world's most comfortable lounge pants and tees

to get 15% off your first pair free shipping and 100% satisfaction guarantee and the greatest mother fucking underwear you'll ever wear go to meundies.com Josh Rogan that's me undies.com Rogan alright thank you appreciate you much too much love to all but bye

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